


Stand

by LillianPeace



Category: The Walking Dead, The Walking Dead (Comics), The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Angst and Humor, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/F, F/M, Family Fluff, Family Issues, Love, Love/Hate, M/M, Ratings: R, Sex, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-07
Updated: 2018-03-14
Packaged: 2019-02-11 19:32:48
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 24
Words: 56,496
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12942162
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LillianPeace/pseuds/LillianPeace
Summary: Rick and his group have reached a safe-zone, Alexandrina. They clash with many in their desire to keep Alexandria safe from the threats of this new world. Cameron becomes friends with Daryl starting a very unlikely friendship but she is just what he needs and even if she can't see it he is what she needs. A new threat, many death's no one is safe in a world torn.





	1. Alexzandria

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Monsterpanda-fanfiction and AO3](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=Monsterpanda-fanfiction+and+AO3).



> I own nothing, and no money is being made.

Thank you for reading, this is just a small story not so sure it will be long. I make no money from this story or any other that I write. Thank you for reading and please review, this story is some comic, some t.v show and some just as it could have happened that is what fanfiction is for. Beta is Monsterpanda, check out her stories.

Alexandria was once an upscale planned community when the apocalypse struck us it was a safe-zone established by the military in the early days of the outbreak, containing a handful of supplies for a large group of people. Ohio Congresswoman Deanna Monroe lead the evacuees as we used the supplies for our survival, including construction materials from a shopping mall nearby, which were used to build the wall. New survivors joined the community shortly thereafter. Deanna soon became our leader she was once an Ohio congresswoman, a natural leader and saw promise and the rebirth of civilization in Alexandria. She believed who people were before the apocalypse mattered in rebuilding and sustaining the community. Reg Monroe, her husband, was a professor of architecture and took charge of building the walls. Her son, Aiden, was in ROTC and was made supply runner while her other son, Spencer, used the church tower as a sniper's post. She put Aaron and his boyfriend Eric Raleigh in charge of going outside to recruit more survivors due to their experience of working together for an NGO in Africa.

Over time, Aaron and Eric recruited enough survivors to establish a thriving community. However, they recruited a man named Davidson who was the leader of a small group which went terrible. At a time, Deanna suspended the recruiting program from taking in larger groups and instead focused on lone survivors. As time went on, Deanna saw that her citizens were not prepared for the outside world and that being inside the walls since the beginning of the outbreak made them weak and inexperienced in surviving. Knowing that this made them vulnerable to the undead and to hostile survivors that wanted to attack the Safe-Zone, Deanna allowed Aaron and Eric to resume recruiting larger groups.

Now this is where the story picks up, my name is Cameron James before the outbreak I was a Professor at Alabama state a farmgirl to boot. I was taken to Virginia by an old friend who was Military he once said this was my best chance for survival and it has been so far. I used every skill I had, raising small chickens, a nice thriving garden, I was the youngest of six brothers, so I was rough and able to get dirty when needed. My hair was light brown along with my green eyes, nothing like a beauty queen would be associated with me, I was high up with Deanna. I modified my home one of the larger ones with secret hidden rooms not even she could find. It was just a hunch, when the world ended so did humanity men and woman would revert to survival being a primal instinct. My home had food stored, ammo and guns all unknown to the community it felt like I was betraying them but in the end, this would ensure our survival when someone unwanted came knocking.

We have had some massive trouble this recent few weeks with Pete, he could not be allowed to get away with beating on his wife but for now he has as everyone turned a blind eye. I was needing to talk to Deanna on this, I was not skinny but not plus size either as I tugged on the jeans with rips on the knees and V-neck plaid pullover with my black lace up boots, and my hunting knife strapped to my waist.

The air was crisp here in Virginia, but I still missed home in Fairhope, Alabama but home is no longer a real choice to return to, I have made a life here helping the community with all that I do.

Deanna was already walking towards me her face grim but friendly all the same, "Aaron and Eric have found a group of fifteen, will be needing you to help make the judgment call,"

I smiled, "Your boys wouldn't have brought them if they didn't think they would be harmful to us. Deanna, I have been thinking of leaving this place is weak and one sign of trouble it will be taken by the first bad guy that comes. Pete beats on Jessie and we all have turned a blind eye, is this how we want to live?" I tried hard to convey my desire to leave if things had not possible change.

"I have worried the very same thing, Cam. After the interviews we can talk,"

I watched the group, a teen boy who needed a haircut holding a little girl no more than two years of age if not younger. A woman wielding a katana holding the hand of the leader who looked happy but wary, behind him was an Asian man with a woman who looked wise but tired, a man with long dirty hair, good structure and a bow slung across his chest.

I sit as they eat and drink, we take them one at a time Rick, Michonne, Noah, Glenn, Carl and his sister Judith, Carol who tried to hide certain things she would be one to watch, next was Maggie and the list went on until the grungy guy walked in.

He sits with a huff reminding me of Pigpen from the Peanuts cartoon.

"Hello, I am Deanna I am the leader of Alexandria. You're," she was always very polite, these survivors are our last hope, I have no bad vibes yet, not even from this one.

He spoke low, almost reluctant, "Daryl Dixon,"

He spoke only when spoken to, he hid much and gave little away and by that Daryl was what she was worrying about, so I spoke up after staying silent. "Deanna, I know what you're thinking. He is very well a dangerous person but not to us as long as we don't harm his friends, his family and we have no intention to Mr. Dixon. We are offering some peace, but in this world, there is never any real peace with what lurks beyond the wall's. He is a warrior, a survivor but he will not do as such at our expense,"

Deanna gave me a small look before nodding letting him go back to his friends, now the last was Father Gabriel, a church going man who insistent the group should be exiled due to their nature. He told tale of the murders they did, and why they did them and I can say I would have. Cannibals are a real issue now, even that was not lingering in my mind but now it was.

I have spoken once during this entire afternoon but now I must speak again, "Father, you a man of god are casting judgment down like hell fire. Confess your sins to us before you do so for others. They killed not for fun, not for pleasure but to take out a threat to every one of us, I will thank them. They kill only the true evil to make sure they and others survive much like yourself. So, confess your sin's," he was sweating now.

"I am not pure and have done wrong,"

I cut him off, "Was it to save others or yourself, I can read people and am a good judge of character as to why I was asked to be here during these interviews. I think you can be a good man once you leave your fear and cowardice behind. Deanna, I think this group is what we need, and if things don't change I will leave and this community will take a blow. If those un-dead come strolling in here most are sitting ducks and that must change, or this safe heaven will not survive,"

She knew this she agreed.

I stood with her outside as she spoke to the entire community, "We are welcoming new members of Alexandria, ones who I hope will bring balance forgive me for saying that we're weak we never have had to face what really lays beyond the wall they have. They can teach us, many changes are coming and so are some exiles unless the change is welcomed,"

"Rick, I would like for you and your girlfriend, Michonne to be our constable. We can give you two homes; Father Gabriel may have the church and the small loft above. Noah, Abraham, Sasha, Eugene, and Rosita may have the third house. Carol, Glenn and Maggie the second, and Rick and your family the first, as for Mr. Dixon he can roommate with the only person who has room Cameron,"

She betrayed me, my home was for me to be alone and clean he was the opposite, he looked none to pleased but said nothing as they're given supplies "We need your weapons, we will give you two guns, the rest while on duty. But we don't keep them just on our persons,"

I took his cross bow but left his hunting knife, I was not asked to hand over the bow as I walked from the group heading towards the lone house, in fact the biggest so that I could use it to grow and raise animals, it was gated off unlike the others. I could tell he was following me as I unlocked the gate, "Careful coming and going the chickens like to escape and it takes forever to get them back inside," he watched them run around his feet, his eyes taking in the massive garden growing veggies a fruit for our community.

"You do all this?"

I smiled giving him a nod as we walked into the clean house "Here you can have the second master, your own bathroom, for showers," trying not to be rude but also alerting him he smelled like rotten ass. But after the first couple months the smell of death was normal, it touched everything since the dead are walking and eating any they can.

"Why you take it," his eyes on his crossbow, it was very nice he must have kept it in prime condition.

I sighed, "Deanna would have taken it here it can be accessed at any time, just don't go parading it around the community. I do have some rules, like if you make a mess please clean it and showering is a must,"

He smiled when I handed him his weapon, "yeah I can do that,"

I walked him to his room "I will go get you some things while you get settled," I left him alone, he was unsettling but also not. I checked his tee knowing his size, so I headed to get his supplies seeing Rick with his daughter, Judith.

I nod to Jessie, she was annoying and not trust worthy, "Jessie, size medium tee and size 36/32 pants and any supplies for a male," she just bustled off.

"Thank you, Deanna said you spoke up for Daryl. He is a good man, he is just rough around the edges,"

"Watch out for Pete and Jessie, they are not trust worthy. I hope having you here is the best choice, I am Cameron but call me Cam," his handshake was firm his eyes set in understanding as the little girl just giggles in his arms.

"This is Judith," she was adorable with light brown curls and matching hazel eyes, she was too pure for this world.

"She is beautiful,"

Aaron was next to us, 'Agreed, a little Princess,"

"Aaron, I think Daryl will be a very good fit for your scouting partner it will also give him a purpose. Might want to give him that thing sitting in your garage, sorry not sorry you'll never get it to run," he just huffed but then he laughed as Rick gave us a look that had so much appreciation in it.

Jessie returned with a stack of clothes and supplies, "I will see you and your wife around Rick, and of course you Princess. Goodbye Aaron, give Eric a hug and kiss for me," I waved before taking the path to my home.

Night was on us, as I walked in heading towards his room the door was wide open as he was just sitting on the floor cleaning his weapon, I coughed trying to get his attention. His dark eyes locked with mine "Got these for you, some clothes and supplies. I am going to go cook dinner have a nice shower and join me if you like,"

We raided the mall for clothes and supplies and a local Wal-Mart taking and freezing what we could, now we have farm raised animals, fruit and veggies. He stood faster than I thought possible it had me stepping back "I won't hurt you no need to be scared,"

I retorted, "Sorry, just you moved faster than expected. There is a small party to welcome you guys, but I have things to do here and am not going, it is at Deanna's you can't miss it,"

"I ain't going to some party,"

I gave a small bow of my head leaving him to do as he needed, I thawed two breasts before I watched them cooking with garlic, rosemary, pepper and lemon, I added some red potatoes to the pan to cook, last was just a nice handful of green beans from the garden. The butter was a compound that I made in large batches for the community, as Reg made the butter when he was not wooing his wife Deanna. I listened as the water shut off a few minutes ago so he would be coming just as dinner was plated.

I took the small jug of fresh lemonade setting it on the table before I was seeing him clean, his hair was still wet but brushed, his face had marks from a recent scuff "Take a seat anywhere," I motioned around the room, but he sat at the table as I brought him a full plate.

"It smells good,"

"Thank you," it was nice sitting and eating even if he hardly spoke, but I pushed a small kit filled with gels, creams and gaze towards him "The wounds look fresh,"

He said nothing, but he did take the kit, color me surprised when he helped wash dishes, he was a southern boy deep down. He walked from the kitchen without another word, maybe having him here wouldn't be so bad.

But nothing good is meant to last…


	2. New friends and a death threat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I sighed, "Sleep well, Daryl."

Deanna stands close as she talks to Rick, Michonne, Maggie, and myself about the civilization she see's growing within the community, starting with the constables.

Deanna says, "You protect and serve. You patrol, walk the wall, watch out for the kids. If there's a conflict, you solve it. And people will listen to you." Pete will do no such thing, he has become a drunk.

Michonne, "Because we're wearing windbreakers?" I laughed since I was not expecting her to say such a thing, she seemed cool and calm, but I was starting to see new sides to all our new residents. I got control over myself, this was not the right moment to be laughing. At times I also watched Carol talking to Daryl from her porch she smiled giving me a friendly wave.

Deanna smiled, "Because they believe in this. Because I'm telling them to. A police officer used to live here. So, we had these jackets and I wanted to make it official. So, it's official. There's going to be a government here one day. That's why I want Cameron and Maggie working with me. There's going to be a police force. That's why I want you two to start it. I see a vibrant community here with industry, commerce, civilization. Real lives. It might be horses and mills, but - What?"

Deanna stops mid-sentence since she notices Rick is looking off into the distance his eyes turned to the clear blue sky. Then she continues in the same encouraging tone, "Does that sound like pie in the sky?"

Maggie and I agreed, "No."

Michonne makes full eye contact as a sign of respect with Deanna, "No."

Rick smirked, "No."

I walked away with Maggie and Deanna heading towards her home where Reg was leaning over the large table outback with Noah, they seemed in deep conversation as we walked by.

Maggie sits next to me, Deanna folded her hands as she spoke, "Any other issues?"

"Pete and his family, I am not fond of Jessie or her bratty boys. Pete drinks until he can't see reason, he is abusive and if you want law and order it needs to start with him. We need to make a jail persay in a basement, I have already spoke with carter and he agreed that Denise has the adequate space needed for a three-man holding space, now all you need to do is sign off and we need supplies as well." Getting her to agree was the hard part, supplies in a world like this can be hard to find.

Maggie chimed in, "Cam is right if we are going to have law and order a small jail will need to be built and maintained. Pete is an issue maybe if he understands there is law here he can stop his behavior and reform, maybe we should toss the booze too."

Deanna looked at us in turn taking her sweet time answering, "I agree, I will draw up a form with Carter and have it done."

"I suggest Abraham to help he is an asset."

I agreed with Maggie, he was packed with muscle and had a good work ethic so far, so all I do is give a nod agreeing with the statement.

I walked out with Maggie, "Thank you."

"No problem."

Glenn was walking up to us smiling, he was dashing to say the least, but he was so in love with her and her to him. I wanted that one day, but men are slim pickings these days. The air was humid with a faint scent of death so I continued walking with her to Daryl and Carol who are still talking on the porch; she smiled seeing us coming.

"Hello, Maggie, Cameron." she was a decent woman, but I was noticing she could manipulate Daryl to do what she needed, she seems to think of him as a son, but she takes certain things too far.

"Hello, Carol. I wanted to invite you to dinner tonight."

Maggie gave me an impish grin before walking into the house with Glenn, Daryl seemed to like the idea since he was smiling.

Carol retorted, "Of course, what time?"

"About six would be great."

I just wanted to make sure she understood a few things, Daryl and I have become friends and I'd rather him not die on some hair brain mission she has him on. I liked Carol but just want her to back off him, he was really coming into his own here.

I walked back down the steps heading towards my own home, needing to check my garden and pick anything ripe, the sun was high up making the air humid and sticky. I left one slab of beef and two chicken breasts out to thaw while I showered the dirt and sweat from me, I took a cold one saving what hot water we had. I set about cleaning after dressing in old sweats and a tank top, was not to impress her or anyone really.

I nearly walked into Daryl as I exited the den, he was just standing there waiting and watching "Hey." I smiled.

"Hey, thank you for havin her over."

I patted his shoulder before moving around him to get back to the kitchen, "No problem, but may I ask a question?"

He just gave a nod his hair was clean but covering his face, when it hit me he was attractive and dangerous.

I asked, "Is she your girlfriend?" I hoped not since it just didn't seem right, but to each his own in my opinion.

He gave me a look before he sat on the bar stool over looking the island where I was chopping some veggies, his eyes cold and menacing but open. And for a few minutes it seemed like he would not answer that I had finally crossed an invisible line he had drawn between us.

But he answered, "At first, I thought she would be my girl, but it just never happened. Now we are like family, nothing more. I liked this girl Beth for a little, she was Maggie's little sister she had some spunk, but this girl killed her too. So, no she ain't my girl." the way he said it was different, it had conviction lingering, at the end his tone was open and promising.

I nodded, "You want to help cook, or shower?" a small fire lit his eyes then his frown turned into a small smirk.

"I can take a hint."

"I hope so since telling you that you smell like decaying walker ass is rude." he turned back a little shocked, but he was smiling, that boy was coming out of his ice shell a little at a time. I smelled the meats cooking adding some diced and minced herbs, a little at a time. I mashed the small russet potatoes adding in butter that had garlic and rosemary. I thawed some frozen corn on the cob from a raid on the large local Wal-Mart, it was boiling in salted water when Daryl walked in. He wore sweats and nothing else, this was a first, and dear god he had scars on his back and torso. I say nothing, but I sneak small glances at him as he sets the table for our guest, some are very old, and some are newer everyone of those scars have a tale.

I was setting the food on the table when a small knock was heard, he just walked off to get it, he walked back in as I set the last dish on the table. "You look lovely, Carol. Please take a seat anywhere."

I sit in my normal seat and Daryl in his, she watches with careful judging eyes as she takes the seat in front of us. "Thank you, it smells great."

She was a good woman, she had her faults but deep down she wanted her group safe and to have some peace, but she kills any in her path. Another knock I made a move to get up, but Daryl was faster leaving us girls alone.

Carol spoke, "You hurt him, and I will kill you." this was from left field, why would I hurt Daryl?

I gave her a cold look, "Listen here Carol, I like you, I really do. But you watch yourself, you're the one sending that man on death missions for you. He is not your lackey, he is like your son and I watch you twist and turn him to do things for you. Cause he is liable to get himself hurt and I don't want that and neither do you. And me hurt him? Gosh woman have you lost your bleeding mind. I can't hurt anyone, I know if I don't learn to kill and fight or I will not survive like most here, as to why I convinced Deanna to keep ya'lls." she was judging my every word, but that didn't matter none she was the one pulling his strings.

She deflated, "I love that boy, and want the best for him he is stubborn as all hell. But he cares and loves with everything he is, being here means I want the zone safe and that means you. I will teach you somethings in private, I can see your point as to how I have been talking to Daryl it just isn't right of me."

But those words are all she got out as he strode back in "It was Aaron, he found the missing part for the bike. I think it will run just fine now."

"Praise god, now that is over, and we can rest easy knowing that bike will run we can have a nice dinner."

Carol smiled "I baked some cookies for after dinner, now Daryl you're going to show Cam how to kill walkers with a knife. This girl needs to learn to fight."

"I can wrestle but not like I want to get up close and personal with a walker."

It was late when the kitchen was clean, Carol was gone soon after, leaving Daryl and I alone for the night. He stood it was not rushed but still quick pulling me up with him he just drags me outside, it was dark as we walked with bare feet to the pond, but we could see Rick and Michonne walking, making sure all was clear.

He took his own hunting knife out handing it to me "Show me how you hold it." I did holding it as if to slice into a pig, I was used to farm life, a knife was like a second skin.

He smiled, "Nice, but when you're facing a walker hold it firmly, straight not slanted unless you are cutting his belly wide open to use his inners as cover." he was behind me my back flushed against his bare chest showing me exactly how to hold his knife. Rick and Michonne watching and making small comments on how to hold myself, my feet, to use my head and keep my cool.

Michonne smiled, "Good work, you have promise. You're a good listener and take criticism very well. Can you shoot?"

I answered, "Of course, I was a farm girl born and raised in Alabama."

Rick clapped Daryl on the shoulder, "Good work, but it's curfew back home with ya."

I rolled my eyes, "Sure thing pops."

Michonne laughing was all we heard as Rick nearly kicked me in the butt shooing us home, I waved back at them as Daryl nodded. Michonne had her palm braced against his face while he seemed to be leaning into her touch, no words said just the pulsing love that was moving unsaid between them.

I turned walking passed Daryl who opened the gate, the chicken in the coop I built with Carter to keep them warm and safe at night.

"Night." he muttered walking into his own room, he didn't make eye contact.

I sighed, "Sleep well, Daryl."


	3. Hearts broken

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reg smiled, "Maybe when the town's people grow and learn you can take a break and let Rick have a turn. So, we can have a little retirement." he was into wishful thinking, there was no retirement, there was only death. And that was only if you were killed 'right', just thinking that made me feel a twinge of bitterness.

Last night as I walked with Reg and Deanna; we agreed on many things, the most important being Rick's group, that Rick had leadership qualities that would come in handy when she stepped down. The towns people have been clashing but even that seemed to be edging off. Reg was along with Noah make blueprints for a better wall and filtration system to help us grow. Aaron has boosted to his mother Deanna about Daryl and just how good he really is at scouting.

Reg smiled, "Maybe when the town's people grow and learn you can take a break and let Rick have a turn. So, we can have a little retirement." he was into wishful thinking, there was no retirement, there was only death. And that was only if you were killed 'right', just thinking that made me feel a twinge of bitterness.

I returned home to see Daryl sitting on the sofa doing much of nothing, just sitting and staring at the walls. "Hello." my tone low as he gave me a look. he was silent most days. Even though it has been some time they have been here, but it seems like he and I have much in common. Deep down.

"Hey."

Maybe he needed a friend even though he has many friends in his group, "Are you okay, Dixon?" at times when we spoke I called him by his last name out of habit.

"What's your last name so I can call you that?" was he joking?

"Aldridge, but not suggesting you do it. I was a Professor at Alabama state when the outbreak happened, at times it's habit to call one by their last name."

Daryl gave a slight nod of his head. "I was a drifter, never did anything really bad - petty crime, drug dealing, assault, and gang work were the worst of it. Worked crummy jobs and hunted when we had to as well." we have become friends, but this was the most he has ever spoken about his past, I was privileged to be the one he spoke with.

I asked, "We?"

"My brother Merle and I, our Ma was killed when we were young; a house fire. After that we got shipped off to our dad and he was not what you would call father material." his tone said not to ask more concerning his father, it was those little things with him are easy to pick up on.

I changed the subject, "I have six older brothers, Kyle was 42, Brice was 41, Ricky was 38, Mark was 36, Bobby was 34, and Frank was 31, then there was me was supposed to be the last boy, Cameron James Aldridge, but I was a girl. Mom once said she nearly had a heart attack and pa and the boys vowed I was never allowed to date. When the outbreak came knocking Maw and Pa were the first to die, my brothers gave me to a friend who was Military who they thought could protect me and that Daryl is how I came to be here." I smiled but maybe he saw the heart break that was lingering behind my eyes, my smile, because he came and sat with me his arm slung over my shoulder, he smelled like death and dirt, but he was warm, and I needed a shoulder at times.

"Merle was not a good person, he ended up doing what was right in the end, but this Governor killed him. He turned, and I felt it was my duty to not let him be one of them. Look, whatever it is you're holding on to; it's already gone, Cam. You have us now, we can be your family." but was it gone? Are my brothers all gone? They could survive but I never knew if they did.

"I can be your family too." my eyes are watery, but he just smiled.

"Aaron lost his bag today, I cursed him good."

"I will talk with Aaron in the morning after your scouting and my tending to the gardens. Apples and such are ripe and ready to be picked. I was going to ask Carl to bring Judith so they both might help." that is how our night ended; getting to know small but intricate details about the other.

I rose early dressing in the same jeans I like to wear, with my gardening champagne top that is made from stretch jersey with a color block and floral design. Shaped in a straight cut, it drapes over the hips, thighs and bottom, finishing with an asymmetric hemline it let the breeze hit me as the humidity became over whelming. A worn brown floppy hat with brown worn boots, my supplies ready as I walked out, the sun was up as I set to work. I filled baskets with ripe veggies, fruit, and herbs as Daryl walked out. He wore jeans and a long sleeve tee, his leather vest too. He strode from the gate keeping the chickens in as he left for his own day.

"Take a break at a point, I don't want to find you passed out in the dirt," his face peeking over the gate humor in his tone as I tossed him a large apple, he caught it without problem leaving me in peace. Carl and his sister Judith arrived she would just chase chickens but being in the sun was far better than the house day in, day out. Carl rounded up the eggs for me, he was a sweetheart.

"Thank you, Carl. I got you something, but don't you go telling and showing it off, it is for your protection." he smiled as I handed him his own hunting knife, with a case he could strap to his waist; he had a baby sister to protect. He hugged me, a damn good kid.

Judith was tired as we used wagons to take the baskets to the storage unit, "Let us help." it was Rick and his girl Michonne who I adored. So, we each pulled a wagon, I had two baskets at home, I grew them and was keeping some for myself, Deanna knew.

Rick held his daughter, "Were you a good girl?"

"She helped feed the chickens, and now we have some baby chicks she has been so much help."

Michonne laughed, "Thank you."

"For what?"

She answered, "For believing in us."

I just braced my hand on her shoulder, "Thank you, not just for being you but for the wealth of knowledge you and your group bring to us."

Deanna was marking down the food and weight as it came in, "Cam hunnie, this is more than expected. You're over working yourself, and you say eleven new chicks?" I nod as she marks it down.

Later that night I sit by the lake, I watched and listen to Rick, Pete, and Jessie as they argue, this was what Deanna was so worried about but was this not the best out come?

Deanna stand with me now as voices become raised "I see you hitting on your wife or kid again, I will kill you."

Pete attacks Rick when he was confronted in front of the crowd, he acts like the alpha male here.

Deanna calls to Rick "Stop! Stop it right now!"

Maybe Rick can't hear maybe he doesn't care, but I do not for Pete but for our community.

Deanna yelled again, "Damn it, Rick! I said stop!"

"Why, Deanna? This is what you wanted in a more violate way, he is the one who is going to lead us and make us better." she heard me but again she was a pleasant woman.

We watch as Rick lets go of Pete. Alexandrians advance towards Rick not to attack, it's not in them to do as such.

Rick takes out his gun aiming at any who advance close to him.

Rick bellowed, "You gonna kick me out?

I retort, "No Rick, we have no intention to do as such, but I will ask for you to lower your gun."

Rick is angry with every right, "They still don't get it. None of them do! We know what needs to be done and we do it. We're the ones who lived out there. You, you just sit and plan and hesitate. You pretend like you know when you don't! You wish things weren't what they are. Well, you want to live? You want this place to stay standing? Your way of doing things is done. Things don't get better because you— you want them to. Starting right now, we must live in the real world. We must control—" he points his gun at Pete who is still on the ground, "—who lives here"

Deanna finally answered, "That's never been clearer to me than it is right now."

Rick shocked, "Me? Me? You—"

Rick laughs in a tired and angry way.

Rick continued, "You mean- You mean me? Your way is gonna destroy this place. It's gonna get people killed. It's already gotten people killed and I'm not gonna stand by and just let it happen. If you don't fight, you die. I'm not gonna stand by—"

I watched as pain flashes over Michonne's face but Michonne runs in, elbows Rick in the side of the head, disarms him, and looks apologetically in our direction. "He is right, Deanna, on all account he is right. Now it is up to you to make thigs better for us, so that we can live."

Rick was well nearly two days later as we held a meeting over the incident Rick or Pete must be exiled due to their actions, right now the town is torn even as I stand with the new comers. Reg and Deanna implore them to make a wise decision, the weather is chilly as Carl watches from the porch and we all talk outside.

It is dark as the stars and moon shine brightly above us, to think I could be watching them and not the meeting laying out in front of me. But things had to change if not for Rick the walkers that managed to get into our safe-zone due to Father Gabriel leaving the gate open they would have killed many of us, but he and his group have helped us. I agreed with Maggie as she came and saw Deanna this very morning stating and reminds Deanna that she made a decision to let them in, and now she's giving the town the decision to send them back out. She tells Deanna that's not leadership, and she's right, but Deanna isn't interested in hearing any of it, not even I knew what was going on in Deanna's head.

"I'm not sorry for what I said last night, I'm sorry for not saying it sooner." Rick tells Deanna, telling her that luck runs out. They need to be ready for what's next. He continues as we all listen, this was it, this is what we needed.

His speech is powerful in the way only a Rick speech can be, but it gets interrupted by a very drunk Pete, not very abnormal.

Pete, holding Michonne's sword, declares that Rick is not one of them. Reg rushes and tries to stop him, but Pete uses the sword to slit his throat as I screamed it mixed with Deanna's own. Without word I am shoved into the porch as Tara drags me behind the covering, it was Daryl he shoved me out of harm's way. I just crawled to Deanna as Reg was bleeding out in her arms, I tried to cover his wound until Denise arrived, but he is gone as we cry. He was like a father to me. Abraham keeps Pete pinned down even as Pete continues to scream that Rick isn't one of them. But, it's in that moment that Deanna looks up at Rick and tells him to do it; we all watch as Rick shoots Pete right in the head in front of everyone.

Reg was taken to be re-executed before he could come back, then we would burn his body but right now I stumble through the streets towards my home, crying with sobs echoing when I am airborne in strong smelly arms.


	4. Finding the lost hearts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hugging was not a sign of weakness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thought this story would do very well on Fanfction.net but it has not, going to try it here and if the feed back is not positive, pretty sure I will finish it. There are mistakes, my computer keys have been messing up and it is going into the shop.

Maybe at one point in my life, before the outbreak, having a guy like Daryl around would have gotten me in deep tar with my family. But getting to know him meant the world. he and I would have been good friends if not more, but this was the outbreak those days are long gone.

I still sobbed even as he set me on my bed, "Hey now, what's got you cryin?" his tone was worried but confused.

I sobbed, "He was like my father." his hand touched my face, brushing hair from my tear drenched cheeks.

He looked torn even has his hand was braced against my face. "I will deny it if you mention it. But I am scared most days that Rick, Michonne, Glenn, Maggie, Carol, Carl, or little ass kicker will not make it. They have been my friends, my family, my reason no to go bad for so long. Together we have seen real evil, we have faced so much since the very beginning." I listen hearing the worry, the hurt in every word he spoke, I moved to a sitting position grasping his hand in mine.

"I am leaving the safe-zone, I just need to get to Alabama and see." taking another deep shaky breath. "See if any of my brothers made it." our farm was massive, the crops could help any survive but that doesn't mean they did, if it was over run I prayed they fled to the hills and somehow made it.

He stood looking at me like I had gone crazy, "You can't survive on your own, if this is something you need to do I will go with you, better we do it now. Carl and Tara can care for your garden and shit. We leave at sunrise, get some sleep." he left just like that, but I heard the front door shut.

I did fall asleep but in the blink of an eye I was being shook awake by Tara who was wearing bright pink glasses and a smile. "Hey, Daryl is getting two packs and said to wake you up."

I felt stupid, if he or I got hurt it would be all my fault. I moved from the bed when she touched my shoulder. "I wish you luck, I would be doing the same thing. But most of us watched as our families died. Here." in her hand was bright green sunglasses, I took them with a smile.

I hugged her, "Wish you could go, Tara. But you know how to tend to the garden and chicks."

She tossed an old tee at me as I pulled it on it was her ACDC knotted tee, my old tattered jeans are next, my lace up boots last. I took a hairband for when my hair needed it, my brush was in my back pocket. We walked from the room together. Carl was sitting with Judith at the bar, she was giggling at her brother who was making cute odd faces when we walked in. Daryl was bagging up some extra food before he was tossing me an apple. "We are leaving, here is your bag."

I walked to a controller that looked like an everyday television remote, I trusted them as I entered a code. The room was silent until the wall moved, then voices and gasps are heard as I spoke. "For the survival of Alexandria I have been doing much more than any know. This does not leave the room."

Entering I took two rifles and a single box of ammo, handing them both to Daryl who walked in behind me. "Impressive."

"This isn't the only one."

Deanna and Rick are outside, she looks as if she had been crying but when she spoke her voice was clear. "You hurry back now."

Hugging was not a sign of weakness. "I will, I need to do this. I am thankful Daryl offered to go with me." but I was worried all my faults would get him killed in the end.

Rick clapped Daryl's back. "You bring this girl home safe now, it's near ten hours to her family farm. Michonne is sleeping but she mapped it out for you, so we know you will be back in three days' time." he was giving us leeway which was good.

I hugged Rick, his words whispered in my ear. "You watch out for him, Cam." he cared so much for Daryl, I would watch out for him, but I was the one who would do something dumb and get us killed. I climbed on the back of his bike putting on the bright green glasses as it came to life, not at all loud. Glenn and Maggie wished us the best, she hugged me tight, Glenn kissed my forehead.

Then we took off out of the gates taking to the back roads of Virginia, my arms wrapped tight around his waist, he said there was not stopping unless we have too, we could be there by five at night if we just drove and with luck no large packs of walkers roamed. I watched things pass us by, so much destruction and death all around us. Cars broken down with the dead resting inside, lone walkers roamed the woods, the streets. My head was resting on his back even being scared shitless I was enjoying myself, but than his bike broke down midday, but he said we are close enough to walk. I was so glad he took my hand leading me into the woods because I was shaking, he dropped it as we moved. The forest was dense as we moved through the brush as hard as it was I did it all without complaint.

His arm stopped me, "A group of walkers, doubt we can sneak around them since we need to get to that bridge." I knew that bridge, we are so close.

"That is Naples bridge." I whispered, he was right we had to go through them to reach it, I was not ready, but our lives depended on doing this together.

He gave me a look, "You got this, I am going to get their attention you get to that bridge." I gave a nod.

He did too, a set of fireworks went off, watching as the walkers saw him, heard him they all made their way to him. He was taking them out as I ran to the bridge, I stopped trying to find him, but he was not superman, there are too many. I change my mind. I would never leave him behind, with that thought I was hauling my chubby ass to him, seeing a walker nearly on him as I plunged the blade deep into it's skull before pulling it out; the walker dropped like a ragdoll.

Daryl gave me a look, "I told you get to the bridge."

I snapped, "Not without you, never."

He could say nothing back as the walkers came but together and with the training they gave me, we are able to take enough out. My knife was covered in brain matter but now we are both safe as the dark came, my hands freezing as he dumped water on the blades, the water tinting red with blood.

"You did great, thank you."

"For what?"

"Not leaving me." the way he said it was embarrassed even.

I blushed, "I couldn't, you and I are in this together. So, if you're with me and have my back you will get all of me."

Now it was very dark as he thought we should set up camp, I was helping start a fire when a gun was put to my head, "No southern hospitably." I sighed but the look, the rage that had transformed Daryl's face scared me more than the gun.

Daryl stood tall, "You get that fuckin gun away from her."

"Get up grab your things and follow me." Daryl had no choice as another man came from the darkness with another gun, I walked with my arms forced behind my back as we're being marched through a worn-out path in the woods.

"We have no intention to take your things, but we don't like people close to our compound. After we release you, don't come back."

I snapped, "You ain't my daddy, asshole."

Daryl put his arm around me his bow was across his chest as we walked, "Just stay close to me."

I did, like glue his body leaned in front of mine to protect me as we entered a gate, looks as if they took the trees and built a well-insulated gate, firm and unmovable. It was the farm, not all of it but a substantial amount, I was scared but as we are taken into the main house. I nearly faint seeing my old home, pictures in frames, my brothers sitting together with me dressed in pink nestled in hay between them. I moved faster than I thought possible, the gun went off but hit the banister, my knife at his neck as Daryl took the other with ease.

"Where is the family who owned this house?" I was seldom angry, but this was my home, they took my home.

"Cami?" I heard when I glanced up at that name the sound of a tired voice I knew so long ago, my eyes locked with the green eyes of my older brother Frank.

I dropped the guy, like a missile I rushed my brother, his arms wrapped around me as we cried, "Frank!" I was sobbing as he just stroked my hair, his hands moving to my face, it was dirty, but he was smiling.

"Daryl, this is my brother Frank."

Frank shook his hand, "Thank you for keeping her safe, Cami why are you here?"

Daryl spoke up for me. "She had to know if her family was alive, and I was not about to let her go at it alone. We have a day before we have to leave back to Alexandria." she gave me a nod.

Frank looked like he wanted to say something, but instead he grinned, "Come on."

"Come on, Daryl." Frank lead us out of the house before he was giving the loudest wolf whistle I had ever heard, but when others heard that they stopped. In the dark with only candle light I could see five people running fast. Daryl and I stood together as Frank let another one rip, I just shrugged.

Once close enough Frank yelled, "Baby girl is home." then I was in a six-way hug, all my brothers are alive, all are alive. I sobbed hugging any one I could. It seemed the hug was short, but it could have been an hour and still too short.

Kyle spoke first, "Cami, my god. We couldn't find you, you look perfect. God, we missed you, we have sent scouts to find you, but none ever did."

Brice chimed in, "But you're home again, you hungry?"

"You're dirty, you hurt at all?" that was Ricky he was a worrier if I ever seen one.

"Now, now guys give her a chance to answer." I gave a grateful look to Bobby as Mark punched his arm.

"It has been too long baby girl." Mark smiled hugging me once again.

I smiled standing once again by Daryl. "I am so happy, happy and blessed to see you all alive and doing as best you can. I am in Virginia, a place called Alexandria a safe-zone that is doing well. I am fine not hurt at all thanks to Daryl, when I made the choice to come find you here he wouldn't let me go alone. But boys I am heading back to Alexandria, that is my home for now, but knowing you're here means I can come and see you." they each looked worried and hurt I wouldn't be staying here with them.

I smiled, "I can give you a map so that if you need us or just me you can locate us." I noticed Kyle was looking at the man at my side.

"Daryl Dixon, these are my brothers; this is Kyle, this one Ricky, Brice and Bobby the twins, here is Mark, and you met Frank." in turn they each shook hands judgment being placed on both sides.

Kyle spoke, "Thank you for bringing her home. Cami, you need rest go up to your room and have some sleep."

"Come on Daryl, I am not leaving you to this rabid pack that some call my brothers." my eyes narrowed, you think after the outbreak they would calm down on who I could be around.

They all seemed to protest but I just stared them down taking this man to my room, which was just as I left it. Daryl was looking around touching the solar system I made my senior year, it won too it was very intricate, so much glitter covered the house that weekend. He looked at my metal band posters, I sit on my day bed holding a framed picture of my entire family, Pa and Mama alive and smiling as their children surround them.

"You were kind of a nerd," he stated as I just rolled my eyes.

I retorted, "I was and nothing wrong with that, you would have been the boy ditching class and doing criminal activity. You might have bullied me, but that is not who we are now, well I am still a nerd." I took my backpack that was hidden in the corner, using old shirts to wrap my photos, a few books too when a knock was heard.

I yelled out, "COME IN." I held another picture book in my hand when Kyle walked in with two plates of food a woman at his side with drinks. It was Abby from down the road, she was a friend from school even though she was a grade ahead of me, I smiled jumping up.

"Abby, I am so glad to see you."

"Not as much as I am glad to see you." yeah, guess my brothers can be unbearable at times.

"Here is some food for you and your man." I paled.

"Thank you." Daryl winked, he was messing with my oldest brother, this was not safe to do but guess he liked to live on the wild side. We ate as Kyle talked telling us everything that had happened so far, Daryl told their groups story so I could eat. Then I told mine, he was impressed I listened all those years to him, the boys, and pa.

Kyle kissed my head. "Get sleep, we have tomorrow." and we did. I pulled out the trundle from under my bed but he didn't cover up with the lavender ruffled bedding, he just lay on top of it. I stuck the quilt mama made before she passed into my extra bag.

I woke not seeing him, my hand was on his chest last night when I passed out but now he was gone. I just wore the same clothes, no need to change. I walked out of my room seeing nothing, the house was silent as I made my way through the open-door way. Outside was another subject; people milled around helping with water, supplies, the harvest. Cows, sheep, lambs, piggy's, and chicks roamed around. Abby and three other women are churning, and some are doing the wash by hand like mama used to.

Abby smiled, "Hey Cameron, your brothers and your man are in the barn."

"You left Daryl with those rabid pack animals?" all she did was laugh, even as I made my way to the barn seeing them and many other men all talking. Daryl was talking as I came up to his side.

"Rick will not bow down if we are attacked, we have come across some people that have done some vile shit. Cannibals, men who tried to rape a teenage boy, others who were hell bent on killing us and taking what was ours." I just stood listening seeing many familiar faces, one I was not too happy to see was Jack; an old flame who was rejected.

Mark was sitting on a hay bale, "Is she safe?"

"I am safe, Mark. But our communities need to come together if anything was to happen. I know Alexandria will come to your aid, my question is will you come to ours?"

Ricky faked hurt, "You question our loyalty baby girl?"

"No, just your sanity, but that has been on going from my birth."

"But yes, I am, will you?"

Kyle took my hand, "You come calling and we will be there."

I just listened after that, they survived by no recruiting it was not safe to do as such. They killed any who came into the compound, that night we could have died if it had not been my family. I helped them as did Daryl in fact as twilight came I was helping roast a large pig, not my favorite thing, I hated killing animals, but it was a matter of surviving.

I was alone with Abby chatting as we turned it over the open pit when Jack walked up to me with a sly smile, "You look good, Cam. Lost some weight too."

"As charming as ever, now go away." my tone was flat, if looks could kill he would be six feet under.

But he never took a hint. "Come on now, I think you should stay here on the farm." his fingers dug into my skin as Abby made her get away, I knew she was heading for my brothers.

I snarled. "Move your damn hands, jackass." seething with hate as I looked into his cold near black eyes.

He acted like it was nothing. "You will stay."

"No, you got it wrong she is coming home with me. Now get your fuckin hands off her."

I watched as Jack listened and Daryl moved me behind him, his body dead set in front of mine even as Jack pulled a gun on us. "Cameron is staying on the farm like her brothers want her too. She and I can work things out."

"I would rather die than be with you." I tried to bypass Daryl but he wouldn't budge, his own gun pointing at Jack.

My brothers arrived and with a single swing of the bat, Jack was dead and Bobby was breathing heavy as Daryl took his knife to Jacks head, I was being held by Abby who gave Kyle a look. "I told you this afternoon he was going to cause issues."

I was in my room an hour later, getting our bags ready to go tomorrow morning, it was late when he walked in he just laid on the bed watching me "Do you want to stay?"

I gave him a look, "No, I like Alexandria, it is home I will miss my brothers, but I can always come and see them and they can come see me. If I stayed it would be an issue. They would be so worried about me they would get nothing done, we leave as soon as possible."

He just continued to watch me as we settle in for the night, my hand draped over the bed as I stared off into the darkness when his voice broke the silence "I will protect you." it was like he was speaking to himself like a vow.

"I will do my best to protect you." my hand was on his chest as I closed my eyes.


	5. W is for Wolves

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He chuckled, "No, but I am not in the mood to let Kruger lose on my hair."

Hello fellow fanfiction writers and readers, here is another chapter of this story that I hope you guys will enjoy. As usual I own nothing except new characters and ideas, I make no money from writing, and all rights go to the rightful owners. Thanks for reading, please leave a review!

I woke before the sun rose, I noticed my hand was still on his chest feeling the steady rhythm of his heart. I was a tad shocked that his hand was placed atop of my own. I needed to pee and have a talk with my brothers before we leave. I slip from bed but getting my hand from his was a task in its own, but I managed. The house was silent as I walked through it touching things as I passed, small intricate reminders of my childhood and all the fun times we had growing up here. Abby was in the kitchen packing some small bags up when I walked in, Kyle and the boys are at the dining table all talking.

I snorted, "Am I interrupting a meeting of the minds?" the smile was heard in my voice as Kyle winked pulling out another chair for me. I sit with my family knowing we needed to talk about things before I had to go. We are a day behind and something tells me Rick will be looking for us.

Abby takes a set next to Kyle, "I have to go, ya'll know that right?" I asked them trying to make eye contact with each one as they stared me down.

My sigh can be heard on the west coast, "I have noticed since my arrival you lot have stopped being leaders and are back to over protective older brothers. You have neglected your duties here and it has been because of me, plus I am needed in Alexandria. I am important there and not a distraction, I love you boys to the moon and back, but I have to go."

They all just looked at me with different degrees of understanding, Bobby stood. "It's that man upstairs ain't it?" Brice just yanked him down his ass hittin the chair hard.

I narrowed my eyes, "You leave Daryl out of this, he is a damn good man. He has been through more than any of us and you will shut that trap, or I will shut it for you Bobby. He is important to me."

Abby spoke up, "Cami, they understand even if they are not showing it. They all got girls now, I married Kyle months ago. They will not begrudge you anything they all assumed ya'll were a couple."

I smiled, "They did but he and I are friends right now. But we're leaving, and I don't want you thinking I don't love ya'll or am trying to escape as fast as I can. We are ten hours away add in a bike repair after we hike to it's location than an eight-hour drive back if all goes well. By now I am sure Rick has sent people out for us." each in turn gave a single nod as we talked for a little longer.

Kyle looked behind me seeing this I turned seeing Daryl "Come in have some food before you both head on home." Abby smiled starting to plate him some food she was passing it to him as he took a seat next to me, his dark eyes moving to my own.

"Morning." even just waking up his voice was groggy with sleep, but he was ready even his bow was across his back as he ate.

I answered, "Morning, sorry I didn't wake you but since you seldom get enough sleep I didn't think it would hurt you none." but the bags are still under his eyes, he nods but says nothing going back to his food.

Kyle cut in, "We will send scouts to you, well it will be two of us at a time. But you should get going soon it is now about ten in the morning and ya'll have a long journey."

It was later than I thought as I stand taking the offered pack from Abby who hugged and wished us well, Daryl was shaking hands with each of my brothers each saying something low before moving on to me hugging, I wanted to cry.

I did as we walked from the house heading towards the gate "I will bring her back." Daryl took the motorcycle part from some guy I had never seen before as my brothers nodded.

I walked next to Daryl with my gun strapped to my back as we took to the woods heading back the way we came, which means walkers after the bridge. The sun beat down on us as we moved tree branches from our way until we came to the large opening to the river. Lone walkers roamed as we moved together keeping to the tree line trying to avoid detection at all cost, the bridge was in front of us as I glanced behind us every few seconds to ensure none are coming from behind.

The bridge was not as sturdy as it once was, the drop wouldn't be bad the river was deep under it. It shook and made noises that had me shaking as I moved slowly over it even when a snap was heard, it was loud.

"Don't look down."

"I am not scared of the fall, it's those walkers I am scared of." in front of us walkers roam closer seeing us, hearing the snap of the tightly strung rope. He grabbed me pulling me the rest of the way until my body was over the bridge, he looked around there was no way we would make it past, again. I took my knife out holding it like he showed me in one hand was the knife in the other was my extra pack filled with things I needed.

He looked ready to hide me, "No one can make it out here alone, don't you dare try it Dixon." I practically growled at the untamed man, his face lit up with a smirk.

He retorted right before sticking his blade into a very moist looking walkers head, "Never could."

We just needed a path and once thing became silent we could make it further into the cover of the woods, I slung the backpack as far as I could in the general direction of the woods. I did what I had too, the sound was the most disturbing thing it sounded like something being removed harshly from a wet tight hole, I just followed his lead.

I pulled the gun out bracing the hilt against my right shoulder aiming for the three advancing on Daryl, the sound echoed but the first was down, then another, and another but soon enough we flee into the woods with the sounds of walkers behind us, but in the commotion, I get myself lost, with Daryl nowhere in sight as the panic rises.

I stop dead scanning the area surrounding me, but I knew I couldn't stay in a single place, I turned trying to double back before skidding to a halt I was even more lost now since I didn't make it back to the clearing, I could feel the prickles of tears as I moved through the dense forest only stopping to look for Daryl, I wanted to scream for him but that would only bring walkers my way.

I watched as a few lone walkers roamed but not close to my location, I moved faster away from them when I noticed it was near twilight, but I was noticing the trees not as close together now.

All those thoughts ceased as my body was knocked into the dirt by a man with long black hair, his face lean with a large "W" carved into his forehead. I kicked hard sending him flailing back before scrambling to my feet, but three on one was no match.

The men smiled moving around me, "What we got here, a little girl lost in the woods?" I wanted gag and cry at the way he looked at me, I was so stupid to leave Alexandria, stupid for getting myself lost in the woods.

"Owen, take care of them walkers. Her screams will only attract them."

The one with long hair was in front of me a blade to my skin, it moved down slowly, "We can free you."

"Leave me alone." I near sobbed but this didn't seem to affect them this even might be all fun and games to these beasts.

I could fight back, and I did but as I was being pressed into the cold hard dirt nothing mattered but getting this asshole off me, I screamed as loud as I could trying to attract walkers to us but soon enough the side of my face is pulsing in pain.

He nearly cooed after punching me, "When there's an opening, we'll make a break for that path. Hmm?"

I screamed, "No, I'll just slow you down." but I saw the path, I could run if I just managed to get free. I calmed down thinking my brothers always dog piled on me, to me this was no different. I rammed my knee up at the same time my head slammed into his sending him back as I stabbed the other man in the leg before ripping it out, snatching my bag and taking to the path sobbing like a child. I ran wanting to scream but staying silent running, hearing their own footfalls behind me when I slammed into a wall, but the wall hand hands as they pawed at my face.

I screamed shoving him back only to see it was Daryl, then I was on him hugging him close. "Three men, they tried, they're behind me." pointing to the men smiling behind us, I blinked, and his bow was out, and an arrow flew.

"Get behind me." he moves firing again taking the limping one down, but the one who tried to hurt me was gone, vanished.

Daryl moves me back to better cover, "Hey, you good?"

I sobbed, "No."

His arms come around me pulling me to his chest, "Come here." I never wanted to leave these arms, so for now I just hold on to him.

But soon enough we must move, "I was trying to find you, I swear. I turn, and you were gone, I doubled back to the clearing and nothing but your extra bag."

"I doubled back and became even more lost; those men have big W's craved in their foreheads. I was so scared, I stabbed one, kicked another in the nuts and ran for it."

"He do this?" his voice tight with anger as I gave a nod, for a spit second, he looked to leave me here and find the last one, but I held on.

Pleading with my eyes, "Please, don't leave me here alone." he saw something since he just dragged me up the path for a while until we came across the covered bike, I just sit watching him work, the way his muscles flexed, tight then relaxed with every movement. He would turn to check on me and smile seeing me already staring like a fool, but after another few hours he sighs.

"We need to get to a safer spot, come on," I took his hand as he helped me up and on to his bike, the cool night air hit us as he drove seeing walkers but no herds, I just held on with my head against his back every so often he would touch my hand letting me know he was still there, even though I was impersonating a baby Kola bear. cricket's chirped but the only sound other than a few moans is the bike as it makes its way home.

About two hours from home a car was coming towards us, they saw us, and we saw them, but Daryl still pulled over aiming his revolver as the car pulled to the other side, but when he saw Michonne, Tara, and Aaron he lowered his gun.

Tara started in, "Rick and Deanna are freaking out, oh god her face."

It must be bad as Aaron gives Daryl a look as he and Michonne talk to him while Tara fusses over the issue that is my face, "Guys with something craved into their foreheads, sick fucks." she went on as she dabbed at my eye with a wet nap, she didn't move when Daryl and crew walked over to us.

Michonne touched it, "Are you okay?"

"I am now."

Aaron smiled, "Get on that bike, we will trail you home."

I had no problems doing that, as the sun rose we entered the gates of Alexandria. Deanna called a meeting, she was more determined now we needed to learn to protect ourselves.

I just sit watching Rick talking to Daryl, Enid holds Judith her eyes on Carl as they smile at each other, young and alive.

I only found peace and quiet once was in my home, he said nothing to me since we left the woods, with his door shut I took it as a sign he didn't want to be bothered, maybe I had caused him enough troubles.

So, I left him alone and he was silent as we passed in the halls, ate dinner together he was sullen, Aaron and Carol said he was upset with himself for not protecting me, that it had nothing to do with him being mad at me. So, I say enough is enough the silence is over as I grab my sweats tossing them on and a ripped tee, next was my scissors maybe he wanted a haircut.

I walked out seeing him laying on his bed watching the ceiling as if it had answers, "Hey, you want a haircut? Just a trim?" I offered, his head turned slowly until his eyes fell on the silver in my hands, he moved off the bed in only his sweats he didn't slam the door in my face.

"Sure, but just a trim." I smiled leading him downstairs to the kitchen area, he sat as I combed through his hair looking at how much to take off.

He asked, "You do this often?" I liked the gruffness in his voice, he had an accent as well as I did but they were not the same.

I conceded, "No, you're the first to let me after I nearly cut off all of Denise's hair. It was on accident I never meant to take off so much then it was me trying to fix it, well it was out of control. But you saw Denise it grew back out and looks great." the truth shall not set you free, because I felt him tense up before he bolted from the seat.

I stomped my foot, "Get back here and take your haircut like a man, damnit."

But he backed away, "You know what Cami, I am good."

I gave chase as he run into the den, I smiled, "Afraid of me?"

He chuckled, "No, but I am not in the mood to let Kruger lose on my hair."

"It's on!" I jumped the sofa in midair tossing a pillow at his head, it nailed him, but he recovered running from me, but the chase was on, he couldn't hide in this house. I crept through the downstairs trying to be silent, I checked the spare room but nothing when something hit my ass, but I turned nothing was there. I was going to lose this game. I walked up the stairs the scissors forgotten in the den, room after room was checked but nothing. I entered the loft leading to the hall. He jumped me from nowhere his hands pinning mine to the wall as I just had a slight panic attack, my mind trying to come up with where he hid.

"The hell you come from?!" I gasped.

"I was hiding from you and your death shears."

I narrowed my eyes, but seeing the humor and how he let his guard down made it hard to be pissy with him "I will just do it as you sleep, can't run away then."

But he said nothing, he just watched me looking at my lips move, I never noticed him leaning in until it happened.

His lips touched mine.


	6. First Run

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Not every run would end in blood and a good haul, it would end in our friends being alive and nothing.

Later that night, with him in his room and me in mine all I can think about is the kiss. It was not my first, but it was the most incredible one I have ever had at first it was slow just as if he was testing the waters with a small kiss, but soon enough it was filled with passion and desire but something wild and untamed about it. The way his hands dropped my own only to move from my face to my hips bringing me closer to him, my own hands tangled in his semi clean hair. The kiss was intense even as we broke apart due to a knock at the front door, I was so stunned and just flustered he smirked walking from me heading downstairs as I composed myself.

"Cami, it's Tara."

With another single intake of breath, I forced my body to move down the stairs seeing Tara in the front foyer waiting alongside Daryl, they seemed to be in deep conversation.

"Hello, Tara."

"I need to see if you or Daryl will come on a supply run in the morning." this was a first someone has asked me to go.

"I will." I called with a little too much enthusiasm seeing Daryl looking rather frumpy.

"Oh, she called it." Tara was goading him as he grabbed her arm leading her from the room when she laughed.

She was serious but knew when to let the stress fade and just be happy "I need to talk to her." she managed to get away from him as we headed to my room.

I turned back to Daryl, "I will be back."

Tara just wanted to talk, "So, I really like Denise and want to do something special for her."

"Maybe a nice dinner, surprise her." I knew Denise loved homecooked meals, but she was our doctor and at times she was just tired with this hectic life.

Tara groaned, "I can't cook, like at all. My mother and older sister did all of that growing up."

I sighed, "Okay Tara, I will come to your place after we clean up and I check the chicks and garden after going on the supply run. I will help you make a fantastic meal for her, maybe even a desert."

When we finally leave the room, Daryl is gone from the house, so after she left I was alone in my room, he and I needed to talk but soon enough my eyes close.

The next morning, I was in the kitchen in my old jeans and boots with a plain black tee, a pack on the counter as Tara braided my long hair. I mapped out what places have been raided each time, so we didn't waste time, we had hours not days. Glenn, Noah, and Nicholas will be going from what I was told.

I have not seen him all morning as our small group leaves the gates, "Be carful out there," Maggie says, her tone happy but worried as her eyes are on her husband. Glenn just smiled placing a kiss on her, but behind her by the tower is Aaron and Daryl talking but his eyes are on me as we leave, so with a small wave the gates close and his face pulls into an unknown mask.

But now my head had to be in the game, it was a small trek into the nearest small town, it was not some big named town, so we figured it be best we at least check it out. The heat was doable as Noah and Tara joked around, Glenn and I walked together since I was not a fan of Nicholas. He was a coward and would turn on anyone he could at any point in time.

"Tara, you and I can check the stores, Nick, Glenn, and Noah can go to the factory and check it out." my voice ringing out as we finally entered the town through the back end. Tara walked with me as we left the boys to do their own scouting while we hit the local stores here for anything we could use. I held the knife at the ready as Tara closed the door with a slam trying to lurer any walkers from hiding but only two came, so we make quick work of them. We found some supplies that Carter could use for sure.

"We will need a car to get just this back." Tara was right, a truck was outside it was an old Ford, I pointed, and she nodded as we took three loads to the truck bed. Crossing this off we moved to store to store finding decent supplies camping gear, food, last was a mom and pop pharmacy that was the mother load for us today. It looked like the people are just out to lunch. I found more boots that I think Daryl would like, more arrows too that are for his bow, last was this leather satchel for his bike those are in a large bag that I would take to the house for him.

"Odd we have not run into more walkers, where are the towns people?" I stated as we used what boxes we could find packing them full before carrying them out, we made six trips as I became so tired, Tara was too as I crossed this off too.

"One more shop."

It was our last too, we found it was a second-hand baby store, all I could think of was Judith as we loaded up on clothes, toys, and books for her. These clothes are cute and sturdy, little boots and winter clothes since that would be coming soon enough.

I walked next to her my eyes towards the factory since that was where we are headed now as we secure the truck, I think Noah and Nick could get in back. "I got it started, lets go we have dinner to cook." her voice so animated now as I hoped in taking the middle seat as she pulled out of town heading for the factory at the top of the hill.

She and I, were not ready for the sight that we drove into it was a blood bath as Glenn was pounding into Nick. "Come on!" screaming as loud as I could, both came running but where was Noah?

Nick was the first to jump into the bed as Glenn slammed the door, he was covered in blood, his face so filled with pain as tears leaked out. "Where is Noah?" is all I got out my throat thick with what I knew was coming.

Glenn just gave me a look as Tara understood taking off. "Cami, he didn't make it due to that walking piece of shit."

I knew this would happen. "Make sure he touches nothing, he is a damn coward." we all took turns watching him, the gates opened as Tara stopped in front of the large garages we used for all supplies. Deanna, Rick, Michonne, Maggie, Jesse, and Denise all come to stand and check in anything we brought back.

"Deanna, we have an issue. I sent Glenn, Nick, and Noah to the factory for supplies while Tara and I went into town to check. We hit every store and brought everything back, but seems Nick is a coward and left Glenn and Noah to die, Noah saved Glenn but lost his own life. I think it is best for our safety Nick goes on no more runs, your choice but with us making changes this needs to be one."

She looked hurt, "Nick go home, nowhere else, Rick and I will be coming real soon." her words sharp.

"You got one if us killed, you could have gotten three more killed. Now you hear me, you will go home, you will wait for us, and you will not be doing runs. You can clean toilets for all I care." Rick was just the type of man you wanted to follow, he had honor and our best interest at heart.

Denise and Michonne looked into the bed of the truck as I spoke, "Maggie I think Glenn needs to go home, shower and ya'll can talk."

"Thank you." I was glad they had each other two souls destined to be together. I watched for another minute as they walked hand in hand towards their home, Sasha walked up in that time.

"Looks like a good haul."

"Oh yeah." Tara was proud.

"The town was a gold mine, untouched. We hit a filled pharmacy, food, gear everything. That bag is mine, these three boxes go to Rick for Judith, clothes for another two years, boots, toys, and books for her," Deanna was smiling as they took the long task of entering all this into the log, Denise was in heaven seeing all the medical supplies, Jesse her son and Carl loaded the selves. Denise was able to take a box filled to her house as we used it as a medical ward.

"Tara, give me an hour." I smiled with a wink, I took the bag slinging it over my shoulder as Sasha was taking the truck back out the gates.

Deanna spoke, "We need to go deal with Nicolas. Cami, you and Tara did us good on this run, thank you sweetheart." I loved hearing my first run was good, but I knew not every run would be good, but we need to hit small towns first. Maybe they would be the best for good hauls, the bag was heavy as I had filled it with things.

I walked when Carl and Enid run up to me, "Here I got that, Enid and I took care of the chicks and the garden for you." Rick was so lucky.

Enid added, "Nothing was ripe yet, but maybe tomorrow."

Once inside the house and Carl set the bag in Daryl's room, I pulled the skates from the bag, handing each a pair along with two candy bars. "Go have fun, but not too much fun."

I didn't shower just set some lamb to dethawed as I left to help Tara, sadly I was home before Daryl as I was grilling the lamb with lemon and pepper paste a made two small side salads with drizzled lemon when the door opened and in walked pig pen.

He was filthy as I pointed to the stairs, "Dinner in ten."

I set the table, plated our dinner when he took a seat across from me "What's in the bag?"

"Should have looked, I set it in your room for a reason." smiling the entire time, he smiled too as we ate and did dishes.

"Come on."

He dragged me into his room, I just take a seat on his bed as he takes the bag also setting it on the bed. He was, I think, more shocked at its contents and it being for him more than anything "This is all for me?"

"Yeah, you need these, and Tara and I hit a jackpot."

"Rick mentioned you did."

But then it happened he grabbed my hand pulling me up and too him, his lips so warm and soft, he held this burning passion that many can't see, but not only can I see it but right now I can feel it. The feeling was new as his lips moved from my own to place rough kisses to my neck with my head in the crook of his neck.

With a deep throat clearing my heart jumped from my chest.

"You didn't answer the door, and now we see why." Rick was red in the face as Maggie, Carol, and Michonne tried to hide their faces as Daryl just held me closer.

"What you need?"

"We want you and Aaron to scout tomorrow, but Cami we wanted to talk to you about getting Deanna to stop the scouting. We come across some then fine but right now we have kids here and having new comers might not be the best thing." he was right, after my attack it hit us there was very dangerous men, my brother even said they only took children and families, no lone men or women.

"I will talk to her, I do agree with you, Rick." I knew everyone was looking at us making things awkward.

"Are we going to talk about the fact we caught them kissing?" Maggie winked, I groaned as they all laughed.

"You leave them alone, about time Daryl found something good." Michonne pulled Rick trying to get him to leave.

"They both deserve happiness." Carol added.

"I am happy for you, brother."

The bond with these people was just awe inspiring.


	7. Invasion part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It is chaos even as the horn blaring stops, I move to find Denise now knowing Tara would be close to her. We are killing any in our path, I take my knife to the woman's head, so she will not return as a walker.
> 
> But a creepy voice echoed "YOU!"
> 
> "You live here?"
> 
> I say fuck it and run it was the man with long dark hair from the woods, but running only caused me to be surrounded by three more men with the 'W' on their heads.

"Okay, how about ya'll leave my house. Even though your bond is inspiring, and you have kind words, you have seen too much and have to go." I started to shoo them from the house, all they did was laugh and crack jokes. I was blushing badly, the heat from my cheeks and tips of my ears are tale, tale signs of this.

"Fine, I need to go have a talk with Morgan anyways." But Rick was smiling, I liked Morgan he was damaged and the values he held now would never last, he would break. But for now, his ideals would cause issues, if we had to take out people for the good of not only us but the remaining good people still out there then I would be okay with such things.

I was not upset they walked in after we had not answered, it was just embarrassment that they caught us in a compromising situation. He was topless, and I was making small mewls of pleasure, after tonight looking them in the face was going to be rough. Daryl just locked the door before returning to his room where I was waiting, he looked just as flustered and nervous as me.

I lay back just thinking while he tries on the boots and sets his new things away, to most Daryl is both a physically and emotionally strong man. He is often volatile, but he is still significantly more level-headed and rational than most people after the outbreak. Though he is usually distant, Daryl has often shown to us all to be caring and selfless. All on his own, he risks his life in an attempt to save Carols daughter, she once regaled the tale to me her own heart break clear as day. Daryl has also proven to be an incredibly honest individual and hardly ever lies that we have seen, a characteristic he shares with his close friend, Rick, thus making him a very respected and trusted right-hand man to Rick from what I could see. Daryl is just as aggressive and agile and can hold his own against the dead and the living, holding certain emotions in at the same time.

In addition, Daryl has a keen sense of intuition, especially when it comes to meeting new people. Like his likeminded friend Michonne and now myself, Daryl can tell almost immediately who can be trusted and who cannot. I know I think of him a little too much, but he was dark and mysterious until he let me in and closed the wall behind us, we talked about Merle, his father Will, his half-Uncle Jess while I spoke of my brothers, college, and being a Professor. Maggie and Carol agreed he let me in and I was his since then, I just laughed at them, but it hit me they, especially Carol, have known Daryl from the beginning.

His voice broke me from my thoughts, "They fit perfect, thanks."

"No problem."

He pulled me up once again, he was taller by maybe five inches so, around 5'7, he isn't the tallest or most muscular of the men, but he is sinewy and strong. He had bluish-green eyes that could be warm or cold depends on you and his temper, but he is fully capable of surviving on his own. He can kick your ass seven ways to Sunday or shoot an apple off your head with a crossbow from a mile away. In other words, he is deadly accurate with a weapon and knows how to street fight like a bulldog.

He looks unsure of his movements. "No thank you, not just for the things but for you." his forehead was pressed into mine as he closed his eyes taking in his own words and actions.

I pull him down to his bed placing myself across his chest his arms come around me when he spoke again. "This is new for me, I may be a failure and disappointment, but I will try."

"That goes double for me." he didn't believe that at all, but this was so new, I liked it though that was my last thought as I closed my eyes falling to sleep with ease.

I felt him move a few times, but I couldn't wake up so when the sun shone through the blinds, all I can do is blink in rapid motion to shield my waking eyes from the brightness. Daryl was awake but just laid there while I slept, creepy but maybe he just woke too.

"Morning."

"Good morning, let me change clothes and I can whip us up something to eat. We both have a full day."

I hurried ripping off dirty clothes dropping them into the basket to be washed, leaving my jeans on after using the bathroom, a light brown knitted sweater that showed a small portion of my belly, I was not skinny so in a world long gone I would have been made fun of for this. But now no one mutters a damn word, because I grow the food they eat.

I just pull my hair into a messy ponytail, and lace up my boots before heading downstairs not seeing him, the eggs in a bowl as I take the cheese Holly made out, it was excellent. But we're running out of milk, wet and dry that would be an issue in due time, I was deep in thought as I mixed the eggs together blending them with pepper and salt before dropping half into the skillet.

The butter meeting the eggs cracked, I ground some chicken sausage into his omelet before adding the cheese, it smelled great. Mine was next, just some parsley, pepper, and salt; last was the cheese before the rest was wrapped up and back in the fridge for another day. I could hear his steps coming from the stairs, so his plate was in his normal spot since we both had much to do before the sun set today. So, we just ate quick, he washed the dishes as I grabbed a few baskets heading to the door he was holding open for me. My house was best, the backyard was massive which enabled me to fence it in and start a mini farm for crops, behind us was more unused land.

I yawned, "Going to go grab Enid, Carl, and Judith. If you lot find a cow, turkey, a piggy while out just bring it on home."

"Why don't you get those two other boys to help too? And will do."

Sighing in such an annoyed way. "They are brats and do no work, I can't stand them. Being too sheltered is not always a good thing. Carl and Enid have such an amazing work ethic for being young, they help." we walked through the gate closing it before the chicks could run free.

Daryl grasped my hand as we walked, Abraham smiled as he and Sasha walked by us "Very nice," she seemed to be doing well here recovering from losing not only her man but her big brother.

I saw Spencer flirting with a newly single Rosita; Eugene, and a few others watching as we walked closer to Rick, but Daryl's mood went south real fast. "HAVEN'T YA'LL SEEN A FUCKING COUPLE WALKING BY?!" he was fuming mad by now, but I just held his hand, in the end he would calm down.

"Morning." Aaron smiled coming to a stop next to us, Daryl just gave a nod as I turned giving Aaron a small hug like every other morning.

Daryl dropped my hand in a jiffy, "We're leaving." it wasn't a real question towards Aaron, his mood switched so fast over something so small.

"Yeah." Aaron turned walking back down the porch steps.

I grabbed Daryl, "You should realize he is like a brother, and gay as hell."

Clarity hit him as he mumbled something close to an apology, before he captured my lips in a heated kiss.

"Oh gosh." a very female giggle echoed as we broke apart, it was Enid and Carl.

"Hello, you two, grab the baby and come help at my place."

I stashed some gum drops and more candies from the raid yesterday for them, "Sure thing."

I never noticed he walked from my side to the massive gates until I looked up and he was gone, he gave a single wave before they exited the gate. I was near passing out as Enid left my basket on the kitchen table before we had to get this checked in, we ate lunch and they had candies after to get some more energy for pulling the carrots up. With baskets filled and the garden cleaned up and seeds planted we start to load the three small wagons down. I carry Judith who is munching on a few gum drops as I pulled my wagon. Deanna as normal checked everything in as Jesse and Oliva put everything into bags and in the massive refrigerators or freezers. Things like this made me so glad I kept so much, everything was so organized if we're overrun they will know how much we have at all times.

I didn't go straight home after, we took the baby home to Rick who was talking with Michonne when we all come calling. "Rick your daughter ate all my candy, she is hoped up really good on sugar, so you can have her back." I loved her, even as I gave her to her daddy she was eating what was now mush drops she kept fisted in her tiny hand.

All of this had the group laughing, I watched Carl and Enid walk off with Father Gabriel while we all talked and laughed about Judith. Oliva took her since Rick and Michonne had to leave. It was going to be twilight soon, but I had one more stop to make, Carols.

She was in her kitchen when I walked in nearly forty minutes later, she is looking out her window as a meal is being cooked in the oven behind her. "Hey, Carol." I gave her a verbal warning that I was behind her not needing to be shot.

She didn't turn, "I really hate her, smoking on her lawn," walking up I see Megan is indeed chain smoking on her lawn when lord have mercy out of nowhere a large, dirty man attacks her with a machete. Once he knocks her to the ground he hits her in the head, likely killing her. Carol doesn't stick around to watch, instead she runs out of the kitchen… hopefully to get her gun. I move with my knife in hand making my way from the house, Carl and Enid are out there alone. But as soon as I open the door they come running into me, for now they're safe.

"We need to get you home, you need to protect your baby sister at all cost. You teens and her are our future. This is not how you can survive on your own this is how we survive together, now Enid I know it is easy to run but we're your family now." I knew how close she was to Maggie, Carl, and myself.

I left them at home as I move as fast and hidden to Deanna's who thankfully is with Maggie. "We have a damn problem."

The screams from the neighbors are heard throughout Alexandria, especially by Deanna and Maggie who are busy working on the filtration system when I find them. We get closer to the tower we call out to Richard who is keeping guard on the wall, but before he can respond he's hit with some sort of fire ball and falls to the ground. By the time Maggie gets to him, he's dead, and when we look up we catche a glimpse of someone climbing over the top of the wall.

"SPENCER TAKE ROSITA AND GET UP THERE." he was good with a gun and so was she, we are being overrun; we have blind spots that need fixing fast.

"We have to move, Maggie get a damn gun."

Deanna, this was her fear.

I moved taking any out that I could with Maggie backing me, we worked together even as it seemed we're out numbered.

I was scared as I was now alone in the commotion we got separated, I have my rifle as I come around the small park where I see Ron hiding behind a tree, a man large dirty mane gives chase to him as I fire hitting him in the leg, his body collapsed like a sack of spuds, as I walked up, "Ron, get home now. Boy get your ass home, you ungrateful snot!"

The man had a "W" on his damn head, even with my hands shaking I hold the gun up even as he begs and pleads I know he has to die, we have innocent children here.

I fire but it just clicks as Ron looks terrified now, "Oh no." the dirty man smiles in a sick twisted way.

I pulled the knife but Carl fires from behind me, "You boy never listen." I vent.

It is chaos even as the horn blaring stops, I move to find Denise now knowing Tara would be close to her. We are killing any in our path, I take my knife to the woman's head, so she will not return as a walker.

But a creepy voice echoed "YOU!"

"You live here?"

I say fuck it and run it was the man with long dark hair from the woods, but running only caused me to be surrounded by three more men with the 'W' on their heads.

"Come on little girl."

Morgan comes from behind and start's having a conversation with the guy from the woods when it broke out into a brawl. I move to my left as Carl fires and I tackle the big one my knife impaling his thick neck, Enid with baby girl in her arms unloads on any that are left, she did not flee.

I hug the teens before taking the baby, I am covered in blood but for now these men have died or fled.

"My dad will be coming."

"I pray they are all safe, because for now we're not; there is a hole in the gate, get Carter now."

I work with Deanna and Maggie, as we have to do a cleanup, but her mind and my own are so far off. Deanna breaks in. "They're both safe."

Even as I helped along side everyone else and rock Judith who was distressed, my mind was in chaos. "I can't help but worry, they should have been back by now, Maggie."

"Yeah, they should have, but I know them so don't give up hope just yet. Daryl is as mean as a bulldog and now that he has you he has something to return to."

She was right.


	8. Invasion part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I am dirty and tired but here we all are putting bodies into the bed of the ford to be driven far from us, the other women pour boiling water on to the blood-stained streets cleaning the blood and making it look pretty normal. But everyone here knows this has changed them, many died because they didn't fight back, in fact they didn't even hide.

I am dirty and tired but here we all are putting bodies into the bed of the ford to be driven far from us, the other women pour boiling water on to the blood-stained streets cleaning the blood and making it look pretty normal. But everyone here knows this has changed them, many died because they didn't fight back, in fact they didn't even hide.

I groaned, "For now this is the best we can do, Deanna. Spencer should drive these up to the fork, then head left he should reach the large ditch about two minutes after. I think it be the best place to leave the bodies. For now, we have Tobin and his crew working on the hole, while Carter takes Carl and Enid to show him every weak point since they are able to get out without us taking notice."

Maggie was with them taking notes since all this had to be maintained and fixed, we are nearly finished with the land behind my house which will mean room for animals, more land to farm as well. We cleared the walkers thanks to Big Red, then evened out the land and started the massive fence around the entire few acres, we are making Alexandria better than ever. I move closer to Tobin as he covered for Abraham, he and his crew work together, this was days' worth of work not a single day.

Judith was sitting in the small park with Oliva, as her and Jesse's son Sam played, he was a snotty little ass.

Deanna spoke, "This was a harsh wake-up call for these folks."

"Yeah, it was. Now you lead them in the right direction, they're scared and with every right."

That is when we hear the screaming, it is Rick, we know his voice.

"OPEN THE GATE!"

I stand with Maggie and Deanna as it opens, Michonne, Aaron, and Rick walk in looking frantic as they see the damage, as they see the truck filled with the dead.

Rick makes sure every surviving towns member is in hearing range as his words reach us. "A massive horde of walkers is making its way here, what we have to do now is keep any light and noise as low as possible. You all understand me?"

I cut in, "Where is Daryl? Where is Glenn? Aaron where is Daryl?"

Aaron started to give small sob's as Eric wrapped is arm around him trying to give him comfort. "Daryl went with Abraham and Sasha, same with Glenn and Nick. This is all my fault, a week ago I lost my pack with photos of us here, those lead the Wolves here to attack." I watched as each person started to look defeated by a simple mistake.

"Oh, like you folks ain't never made a mistake, Aaron they would have found us no matter what people like them kill for pleasure. I understand not wanting to acknowledge how things are, but that fighting is the new reality we all must live with." my words touching each one as some understand, most do.

Night comes, and we learn Rick was given full leadership as Deanna stepped down, the wall was done but it needed to be re-enforced.

Two days have passed, I tend to my duties but stay with Maggie as Rick has forbid us to venture out and find the boys, the horde was surrounding us now. Rick assesses the damage from the Wolves' attack, and finds a section of wall were the blood is dribbling from, and starts working to re-enforce it, we are aware his hammering is luring more walkers to the walls. Tobin joins Rick to the repairs, admitting to Rick that their group brought a lot of changes to Alexandria but the remainder of them are adapting and thankful for their help. Maggie and I, also help hearing Tobin talking to Rick, we have to get this wall fixed.

After everything is said and done, Maggie and I wait on the lookout tower together, our eyes glued to the landscape searching for a sign of Glenn or Daryl, she is having his baby so he has to come home. Father Gabriel posts a sign for a prayer circle. Rick shreds it as he strides by Father Gabriel, who patiently replaces it with a new sign. We see in the distance by their home that Rick and Carl are teaching Ron how to use a gun, that was not the brightest idea, that kid is a ticking time bomb. He blames Rick and Jesse, his own mom, for his father's death.

"Not the best idea."

Maggie nods, "No it isn't, but look now." we see the scene behind us has changed, Carol and Michonne are with Rick and Morgan who look to be arguing. All we could do was watch them, it looks heated as I give Maggie a look.

I say with a long sigh, "I will be back."

Rosita, bless her, is giving machete lessons to my fellow Alexandrians, some look like they could be doing well. Eugene, well he was scared, he was the person people bullied. He was smart and that was valuable.

"Death is easy… its watching your friends die around you because you're too scared." I watched as he strode far away from her, but we all knew he really liked her as well.

"We need to saw some more wood, Tobin. Got to get the wall supported." my tone low, but Tobin and Rick just get to work, as do I, doing this means my hands are busy, doing this means my head is not filled with worry for Daryl.

Tobin says, "Some of us folks have been reluctant to change, but now we see you have been right all along." He sighed. "Don't give up on us." Tobin urges.

I hug Tara even as Rick is tearing into her, "ENOUGH!" my voice angry. "She did what she felt right, and for that Spencer owes her his life. You have a saving people thing too, Rick, so don't cast stones."

Walking off towards the towers to re-join Maggie, when Carol stops me. She is worried. "Morgan is up to something, I am going to follow him but I saw you first. He will come home to you, I have seen you fight, have watched as you worried but continued to help where you could, he would be proud."

I tried to smile as the tears welled up, "I am so worried."

Carol left to do her stalker shit with Morgan as I headed to my destination when I see Maggie screaming. "Those balloons, its Glenn." she is all but crying her smile so brilliant. I just smiled and clapped alongside Rick when old church tower, which had been deteriorating through the time we have been fixing the wall, topples onto the wall segment that Rick, Tobin, and I were trying to enforce, crashing through it and allowing walkers to flood into Alexandria.

"It has smashed through three panels." I gasped my body going ridged.

I watched in absolute terror, as maybe hundreds of walkers pour into the streets as Rick yells over the noise. "GET INSIDE, LOCK YOUR DOORS."

Everything happened so fast, I fired alongside Rick and Deanna who try and thin it out as much as possible while everyone flees as fast as they can, and to where ever they can. Maggie is struck in the leg by a stay bullet but with a struggle she makes it back up the ladder before the walkers can grasp at her ankles. I am going to run out of bullets very soon, we needed to get to a house fast.

Rick was being over run but I was fairing no better as I fired again, out of the corner of my eye I can see Deanna fall but she must not be seriously hurt since Rick is carrying her as we make an escape. I move with them firing as Carl, Father Gabriel, and Michonne all join in, we keep them back as we take refuge in Jesse's place, the first floor is going to be over run so we slip up to the second where Jesse and Sam are waiting for us.

I looked back, "Where is Enid and Judith?"

Carl produces his sister, "Enid went outside the wall."

Jesse is trying to get Sam to be as brave as he can, but he is broken down in fear even as his cocky brother stands by. I sit on the bed checking on Deanna who refuses the offer for me or Rick to go find Denise, she lays there her wound much worse than we thought, the saw blade ripped into her.

I held her hand, "Deanna, come on let me go get Denise."

"No, she was taking care of Scott last I checked and he needs her more than me." her face was pale though her words are firm and unyielding. But there it is on her side, she couldn't be saved.

"Rick grab Michonne and come here." my voice as low as possible but they heard me just fine. Together they walked in "She has been bitten." the bite mark was fresh as blood and mucus oozed from the wound.

"Well, shit." Deanna says.

Rick walks from us with a plan to raid the armory using flares to lure the walkers away from Alexandria, plus in the armory there are more guns, we need those now more than ever.

Michonne and I clean her wound, "I want to continue what you started, you had great plans for Alexandria."

"What do you both want for yourselves?" her voice growing weaker and weaker as time marched on.

Michonne answered first, "I want my family to be safe, I may not be his real mother, but I love Carl and Judith as if they were my own. My goal, my happiness, is to have us all safe."

"I want our community to grow and succeed beyond what we think possible, I want Daryl." in my heart so much more could have been said as I have grown close to Rick's group.

I left after a few more moments as Deanna took a small nap.

"Where is Carl?" I asked, he was nowhere in sight as Michonne took the baby from Jesse, Sam was still just in a state of shock.

The sound of glass breaking is heard from below us, "What the hell was that?" Rick looked to be leaning on the edge of a break down.

"Jesse get some sheets, Michonne we need to kill two walkers and use them to camouflage ourselves to make it out and passed the horde to the armory."

We kill and gut two walkers, each sheet covered in guts, Father Gabriel in his own sheet walks from Deanna's room, "She is staying, she will take her own life when the time is right."

I wanted to go back in a rip her a new one, but Rick and Michonne stopped me "Let her be, we need to get out of here now."

I had no choice, I take the sheet and cover myself like the rest Sam and Ron look so hesitant but right now this was our way out. I smile at Carl, "You got this?" all he did was smile.

"This is not my first time being covered in guts, doubt it will be my last."

Glad he could joke about this, because I was dead scared. I stay with Michonne as we start to make our way from the top of the stairs, being silent when Father Gabriel speaks up. "I'm not stopping." insinuating he was not going to stop to help us if our cover was blown, I doubt this; he was changing, we are all. We move through the walkers that have made their way inside the house, the air is crisp as we make our way to the front porch before we continue on having no time to stop. Clasping hands we move along with the horde it seems like everything is going so well, but then that little shit starts.

"Mom." it is a weak call, but he doesn't stop. It grew louder, "Mom." we tried to hush him up, but it was not happening he is scared, and he needs his mother.

The walkers are becoming aware of us now as Michonne lets my hand drop, I hold tight to Carl incase we have to bolt.

Rick knows it might be a bust, "I need to get to the trucks, I can get the herd away from us that way."

I was not shocked, "Let me take Judith, Rick. I will take her to the church and protect her, I promise." Judith held such a spot in all our hearts, I watched Rick un-cover his baby girl and hand her to a man who once condemned them. His hand on Father Gabriel's arm then he was slowly walking away since Sam refused to go.

We move like a snake all holding hands, Carl smiles at me with a small nod and a squeeze of hands, just to remind me we are never alone. I see a boy of maybe ten who has turned, this was the first child walker I have ever seen, I choked back a sob trying to tear my eyes away from the sight of his little body decomposing, large open nasty wounds.

"MOM!" Sam's eyes are wide in fear seeing the same little boy that I did, he doesn't move, we try but he is now in shock his body tense and frozen. His fear of being a walker was seen in that other little one, I cry but don't scream but walkers start tearing into his flesh ripping and tearing the blood spurts hitting us; the sound, the sight would haunt my every dream, no matter what he was a little boy.

Loud anguished sobbing as Jesse watched her son being killed, not able to help him a mother's worse fear was playing in front of us all. She just sobs over and over "No." all the while watched Sam, who is dead now, but the walkers continue to eat him and now her, she still does nothing to stop them even as they bite and tear into her.

I yank on Carl since Jesse has his other arm as she is dinner for them walkers. "Rick, she ain't letting him go." trying to be silent, but Jesse is dead with her hand clamped down on Carl.

I yank as Rick use's his small hatchet to sever her arm, it was the only way to get Carl free, his body slammed into mine as a gun went off, Ron shot at Rick, he waited and took his chance. But Michonne impaled Ron with her katana, making him miss, for a split second I was happy until Carl's grip slacked, and he swayed on the spot. I held him up as his words hit us. "Dad."

Ron is now being snacked on and this time him being a kid meant nothing to me, he deserved it.

I held Carl as Rick turned, Carl had been shot, I just held him as blood poured from the wound in his right eye. Rick was on us as he had no hesitation picking his boy up and running for Denise's house.

Michonne and I cleared the path, her katana and my hunting knife slashing as many walkers as we could until we are safe in the house, I can't look to see if Carl is alive, it hurt so bad. But Denise is working, I can hear her. Heath, Spencer, and Aaron are hiding out here as well.

"Wait for me." I barely see Rick walking from the front door, I call out to him knowing what he is about to do. I wanted to help so I followed along with Michonne we three walk from the house where Carl is being worked on, none of us able to take seeing him when there is a horde right outside the door.

I know that I might die but others can still be saved, I take my only weapon the hunting knife and just lose it. My mind going blank as I saw dead eyes staring at me every time I stuck the blade in to the hilt, I move on so it again, it was on repeat. I took notice that Heath, Spencer, and Aaron are now helping Rick, Michonne, and I each killing any walker in their path.

Eric, Olivia, Bruce, Francine, Kent, and Barbara venture out and join the fight. "We can beat them!" Rick cries as we all do just that, we fight. I am in the same clothes as two days ago, I was dirty, bloody, with dirty ass tear streaks running down my face.

But there she is, Enid along with Glenn, who is carrying Maggie to Denise's as Enid fires killing another, she sticks close to me, but she needs to go now. "Get to Carl, Ron shot him hunnie. You go and hold that boys hand." the look on her face was filled with fear.

She takes off as I give her enough cover when the sound of machine guns, a large fuel truck comes through the gate, Sasha herself was driving as every walker around me started to fall to the hail of bullets hitting them.

Big Red and Daryl stand atop the tanker firing down bullets, it was like a bowling ball hit me in the chest seeing him alive. Daryl just looked at me as Sasha was dumping some fuel by the smell of it into the small pond in the middle of the town, I looked away going back to killing but my eyes found him as he had some very large gun on his shoulder, it fired something into the pond.

An impressive ball of fire shoots into the dark sky, but we can't stop; now the walkers are flocking to the fire, burning with no way out.

Daryl is barreling towards me and I don't hesitate for a second before I tackle him, my legs wrapped around him as we hugged, he was hurt but nothing bad. I let out a sob for the first time as everything hit me, he just held tight saying nothing.

"I missed you." it still came out as a whimpering sob.

"God damnit, I fuckin leave and…I missed you too." whatever he wanted to say he thought better of it, but something was lingering on his mind. We all talked at Denise's, Daryl and Rick in a corner as Carl was now laying on a spare bed with Enid holding his hand.

"We did a small sweep they're dead, we have the truck blocking the entrance and another the back. My crew and I will have the gate back to better than new in three days' time." Big Red, well I knew Abraham hated when I called him as such but not like I cared much.

"Sasha let people know, they need sleep, a group calling themselves Wolves attacked first they're the ones who caused the damage to the wall, after we were trying to fix the wall it fell and the horde entered. Daryl, she has not slept a damn wink in over sixty-hours, get her home. She was something else, I am so proud of you Cami, she even put me in my place." I blushed but Daryl said nothing he just hauled me from the house, the streets leading to my home are now littered with rotted bodies.

I needed a shower something fierce, and that was my goal not to pass out before a shower. The chicks are sleeping and healthy, tomorrow I had to harvest some things, my yard stayed untouched. The house was dark the only sound was him locking the door as I set the basket away, I had emptied it a day ago when I had a few minutes. He is still silent but right now the shower and my bed, his bed, just a damn bed was screaming bloody murder for me to just pass out.

I turned the water on setting my tattered shorts and Metallica tee on my bed along with undies, my filthy clothes in the basket that would need to be washed tomorrow as well. The water was amazing it pooled at my feet; red, brown, black, and so many other filthy colors, the smell was gone now at least. My body was sore, bruises and cuts, littered me after the dirt was removed.

I felt cold air hit my back side "It's just me." his rough tone was welcome, it was his body that scared me, and him seeing mine. I was pretty, but I wasn't skinny like Rosita, I wasn't heavy set like Oliva I had curves, a big butt and boobs like my mama.

His arms turned me, he was just as dirty as I had been so I just handed him the luffa and soap, trying to keep my eyes on his and now where else. I was clean and after a few tries so was he, in the shower he just held me and it was very new to me, the way he stroked my wet hair.

"I don't ever want to lose you, and that scares me now more than anything. I leave and an attack happens, then a shit ton of walkers comes, when we drove in seeing it all you were the only one I was thinking about. There you were the girl killing walkers, you were amazing, maybe I just wish I knew you before all this shit happened you're not like any girl I have ever met."

Now I was crying, "I wish the same, but now we make the most of what we have in the here and now."


	9. Maw and Paw

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I keep telling you, Rick, she needs to be outside."
> 
> "Yeah, dad."
> 
> "Yeah, dad." I copied as we all ganged up on him, but he just smiled.

I sit with Judith in the park in the middle of the town, the pond back to normal with zero fuel, I have two ducks swimming in that pond. It has been two months since the attack, we not only survived we became closer as a community, we have expanded with a bigger and better gate.

Maggie sits with me as we talk, she is excited and scared as any rational person would be. We have formula stocked and that was a very good thing for her and Glenn. "How long have you and Daryl been together?"

"Two months and three days, we got together the day of the attack before he left. Ten months ago, you all came here, ten months ago he moved in an it kind of snowballed from there, he opened up to me and me to him. Just getting to know each other a little at a time until one day I tried giving him a haircut, yeah that was the night he finally kissed me." she smiled listening to everything I said, as we watched Judith walk around on unsteady feet playing with the ducks or on the slide.

"We're all glad he has you, I am glad we all have you." with that I carry Judith home to have some food. It has been so long in retro spec that they came; with them came change, change was better when it was positive.

Rick, Michonne, and Carl are at the table. "This girl needs more time out, had to drag her kicking all the way home. Oliva should be able to care for her both in and outside." placing her in her chair as Michonne set her plate in front of her.

"I keep telling you, Rick, she needs to be outside."

"Yeah, dad."

"Yeah, dad." I copied as we all ganged up on him, but he just smiled.

"Fine, I just don't want her to get hurt." it was all inevitable we all will be hurt, but it is how we handled that hurt that mattered.

"So, Rick, I love you." I started out, it was how I kind of started with my own father, putting on big eyes and pouty lips.

He just set his coffee cup down, but his face was cracking as Michonne knew what I wanted, she stands with her arms around him. "What you want, Cami?"

"I want to go with you and Daryl, he has been god awful not letting me go anywhere. I have nothing to pick today, the garden and chicks are already done, I think it is vey unfair I am not asked to go since the attack." making my eyes as big as they can, my lips quivering, it worked on pa, but Rick was a hard man.

"Fine, just don't look at me like that, ever, it breaks my heart…like a little lost puppy." He muttered the last part.

Carl scoffs. "Now if I did that, I might get popped in the head."

Michonne gave him a one arm hug. "You could do it to me and I am sure you'll get what you want, well within reason. Girls, are very different and now it looks like we just adopted Cami."

Rick just laughed, along with Michonne as Carl smirked. "Good, I love her now I have a big sister who can kick my ass, and watch out for me while I protect Judith."

I smiled. "I just need my knife and I will be set to go."

I was happy as walked back to my house, Daryl was at the table eating when I walked in he smiled, he looked ready to go as I strapped the knife to my waist. "Morning, hun." his voice chimed, his eyes went to the knife, but he said nothing.

"Morning." placing a small kiss to his lips, kissing him was my new hobby. He was the best scout, so he was gone a lot, we have slept in the same bed, showered but nothing more than that. He seemed to enjoy it, the way his hands would move, his tongue it was all magic guess being a criminal and bad boy really paid off.

I was dressed in ripped jeans, and a cranberry plaid button down shirt that was keeping very warm, my brown riding boots when he was in black jeans, pretty worn too, a black button down with what it seems is a missing pocket.

He had no issues with me walking to the gate with our hand intertwined, his bow slung across his back as we enjoyed the small walk, Rick and Michonne wait at the gate for us. I felt a twinge of guilt at tricking Daryl. He was not going to be happy I was going but I knew I could be useful and I have proven I can handle myself.

"I won't be gone long, should be back by tonight." his voice was raspy by nature, but it held such love now, a fact he only let me see behind closed doors.

I hesitated as we reach the gate.

"Come on now we don't have all day." Rick smiled as we stood close, him and Michonne hugging as Daryl hugged me before pressing his forehead to mine.

I whisper. "I was given permission to go." I watched as his eyes opened and they're cold and cruel, I would not back down even though it seemed my safest bet.

He in one movement move back his arms disappearing from me, he was pissed, his face was cold and menacing. "No."

I just walked to the gate as Eugene smiled down as it opened, I can hear Rick. "Daryl, calm down. She will be with us and if you hurt Michonne's new baby girl she will cut your junk off."

I held in the laughter, my face contorted when she chimed in. "I will too, she is my daughter now, I will go level ten mama bear on you." I felt the genuine love we all shared, it hurt a times because I really did miss Ma and Pa, my brothers too.

"She is safe inside the fuckin walls, I …" my heart melting if he wasn't so damn stubborn every time he almost says something mushy he stops and becomes cold.

I called back as I was far head of them. "That's why you should tag along, I might trip and kill myself." the look he gave me was amused and angry all rolled into a panic attack, this was a new side Rick had never seen, not with Carol or Beth.

Rick and Daryl had to jog to get to me, I didn't have my map, so we are going by Rick. "We have more than enough provisions so if I might ask why are we going out again?"

"You can never have enough, we also are checking around for lone survivors." Rick spoke as we got into the car, he was driving and low and behold I was stuck in back like a disobedient child; Daryl ignored me.

Rick says. "I think today is going to be a good haul, I can feel it, maybe having Cami here will be good luck. Here and Eugene have been the only ones to find good food supplies, medical supplies, they point us, and we go. Maybe we will find a new friend or two along the way." he was hopeful and that was what was needed.

Daryl was not a happy camper. "Doubtful, we have not seen anyone in weeks."

I just watched out of the window, up the street I noticed a house with a shed but what got me was the tracks to the shed, they're still there that means something was taken to the shed often. With luck Rick had to pee and we are able to pull to the side of the road, I walk into the yard after checking over the gate for walkers. It was a decent backyard, very well kept so I climbed over while they took a leak as Daryl put it.

I moved close to the fence in case it was needed to jump over, my knife was out as I tapped on the shed three times, but it locked as I take one of my pins and get to work, I learned this from Brice when he was going through his criminal phase. The lock clicked open as I tried to keep the chain from making to much noise. But just a lone walker in some tattered pink clothes bustled from the house, she was taken care of easy but knowing there are more lurking made me hurry.

I opened the shed thinking some tools that could be used would be resting inside, but no, at that moment every bad thing I said about women who used coupons and paid a dollar for two hundred worth of shit, I took it all back.

In that moment a hand clapped down around my mouth, I tensed up before ramming my elbow back as hard as I could into a very soft gut, it was a little dark as I held my knife to a throat. "Calm down now, Cami. It's me Rick." I was crying, I was scared but I just put my knife way.

"Sorry, but look what I found can you bring the car around."

Rick chuckled. "Thank you lord for extreme couponers." amen to that, I was alone everything looked new still, that walker in pink kept everything air tight, I helped load the trunk, Rick walked into the house to check if there was more, and there was another large cabinet filled with cans, dry milk, dry potatoes, things we need. The trunk was filled to the max, as some had to be set in the back seat with me. This was at least a good day.

Rick let out a sigh. "Daryl, come on she did good. She can't learn to survive living behind a safe wall. You love her don't you, I love Michonne and yeah it be easy to say stay behind but that is not how life is now. She is your girl stop acting like she isn't here, because I am glad she is here." they thought I was sleeping on a pillow made of bags of pads.

Daryl gives a grumble. "I can't lose her, I don't know how I fell so hard for her. I never have loved anyone but Merle but what I feel for her I never wanted to feel or even thought I could." my heart was goo, he was a good ole southern boy deep down.

I wanted to say they're both hot headed and I was logical, rational, and could be of use.

Rick points and we see a sorghum barn, Eugene said we needed it so here we are, I was out giving a slight stretch before we walked into a massive trucking garage, two trucks lay there, it was pay dirt both are filled with supplies everything we could use, one had maybe half of the other but still so much. I was going to drive the filled one just to show Daryl that I could, how useful that I could be.

"I can drive one truck, I know how, you two figure out who will drive the car back." I just jump in the cab of the sixteen-wheeler, as they debated I watched Rick get into the car as Daryl got into the other, I buckled and was the second to pull out, it was a task, but we had a little cargo train going. I turned into the gas station behind them this was very un-needed, but Rick mentioned it might be worth it. I watched as Daryl hooked a vending machine to the back of my truck as it was his way of messing with me.

I was in the driver seat when fireworks went off making me jump pulling my rifle, heart hammering in my chest as I un-buckled the door flew open and there stood a guy, he was very nice looking. His hair was long it looked soft to the touch, he smiled his green eyes filled with mirth.

"Hello ma'am, my name is Jesus. I see we have a problem."

I smiled. "Hello Jesus, I am Cameron now I take it you want this truck and I can't let that happen, but we can work something out. Either you can come back to our safe-zone or we can give you some, allies are better than enemies. He gave me a look as Rick and Daryl shoved him into the truck, I jumped down.

I took Jesus by the coat. "He is not an animal, he was talking to me, we need no enemies I am sure they will come at us, he was not hostile, Rick trust me, please."

"Talk." Rick gave him a chance.

I added. "We are good people, you seem the same." I pleaded he stared at me the entire time, even as Daryl growled taking my hand.

He finally spoke. "I belong to a community called Hilltop, I was out trying to find supplies same as you. We have peace and I would like to keep it that way." his tone was honest.

I gave Rick a look. "Rick, we need allies and maybe this Hilltop will be good. I think no, I know we need to give him that truck a sign of good faith, between new friends." Daryl just fumed walking away as I rolled my eyes. "Excuse Daryl, he is rough around the edges, but he will come around."

Jesus smiled. "Maybe he is just jealous." of what?

Rick gave me a hard look, "Cami, this is your call. I trust you."

I was thrilled, "Jesus, we're from Alexandria. Take that truck it has a vast amount of supplies, a gift from Alexandria to Hilltop as a show of friendship." He was looking around, not sure if I was being honest but Rick gave him the keys moving away from him.

He spoke. "Here, I am sure we will both benefit from our new friendship." he gave me a small map, that he started marking. "Hilltop." I smiled.

I nod, "I will send two scouts with a map to Alexandria, drive safe." I smiled getting into the truck as Rick calmed Daryl down they both got into the car as I pulled out seeing Jesus checking his haul, he was smiling as he waved us good bye. As I drove the sound of the damn vending machine was driving me insane, but soon I was pulling into our home. It would be getting dark soon, Oliva, Maggie, Eric, and a few others unloaded the truck. Oliva was checking everything in, I moved some away into a basket Enid was holding, same with Carl.

Michonne hugged me, as Maggie smiled, "Bravo, you did very well with that man." I was happy they at least thought so. Girls are happy with the trunk of the car, it held so much food, and things, I took some cheery blossom lotion, shampoo and conditioner, a few boxes of tampons, the baskets filled and safe in the hide outs, I set my girl things away.

The house was silent while I just cooked some chicken and a salad, I made a nice and simple ranch dressing with the packets we found. I sit eating alone when he finally strolls in, he just takes his food to his room not speaking a word to me. I knew he was giving Denise her orange pops for Tara, when she arrived back. I sit alone, this was not what I wanted, I wanted him to see me being able to handle myself and be proud that I could do so. He has been a little hurt by Carol maybe that has something to do with it, she vanished in the night soon after the attack, Morgan and Rick tried to find her but nothing.

With nothing left to do after cleaning any mess I go for a walk in the darkness, lights glitter all around me, my feet just carrying me around, the tower was guarded, the storage area locked down. I lay in the grass just looking up at the stars, so bright without the lights of the cities to drown them out. I was in love with him he was a hard man to love but I did, it had been two months since we started dating but the feelings came before I started to accept them. We rode his Harley to find my family, he had to of cared to even do it.

I stay outside enjoying it all when I felt another next to me. "Give him time, Cameron. He and I were loners until we met Rick, I adjusted well and so had he, but love was never something he felt for a girl. I am sure he loves us like family, but you are another subject." Michonne smiled from next to me, her eyes also staring at the sky.

I say. "I love him and would do anything not to lose him."

"We all do what we can to ensure the ones we love live, I love Rick, Carl, Judith, and you. I lost my son, my Andra the first few weeks of the outbreak, my little peanut was gone, and I vowed to myself Carl and Judith would not have the same fate." I felt my lips moving as tears threatened to spill over.

I did let them it was not weak, I say. "My ma was bitten while trying to protect me, it was days into the outbreak we never thought it reach us at the farm. But it did, old man Hank came stumbling onto the farm looking beyond ill we had heard what was happening, but than more came. My ma was in the house and the boys started to cut down massive trees to use as a gate to protect the farm, so I fired nailing him the head just like the army said. That caught her attention she rushed from the house her own gun in hand, we tried, god help us we did but there was so many. She shoved me down into the ceiler and kept firing. She had been bitten, I can still remember her words to pa." I take another breath as fresh tears cascade down my face.

"She said 'take care of her boys, she is your responsibility now. I love you all so much, so happy you each blessed me with being your ma. I have loved enough for many lifetimes your pa, and you kids. Pa, don't let me turn into a soulless killer, take me out to our spot and do it, I can die happy there. Cameron hunnie, I would die hundreds of times to just keep you safe, you don't ever think this is your fault. You were my blessing for our lord, a little girl so beautiful and smart, I am going home now.' her voice grew weak even as pa carried her away, he killed her before she turned. He was a hard man but after she passed his goal was for me to be safe and that killed him too, he was bitten five days later by his own best friend. All my brothers were in the army, they gave me to their best friend when he promised to take me here."

She was holding me. "We all will lose someone important, so much has happened, so much that we shouldn't have lived through. And despite it or maybe because of it, we did. We're still here. The two of us. We're still standing, and we're gonna keep standing." Michonne was right, it hurt but it was right.

She and I started to walk again, before she gave me a hug. "Get some sleep, he has been following us the entire time. He was sitting on the slide when you were talking about your ma." oh, god he heard me sobbing, snot and all.

My feet moved to our house even as he strode up next to me, his hand slipped into mine. "I am sorry, Cami."

I sigh, "It's okay but we are a team in this."


	10. Tears of the full bladder

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> But my boyfriend was tired of me risking my life.

I sit here reflecting on the last little stretch of time. We have joined Hilltop, Maggie and I, well we're not fans of Georgy he was a self-serving man who was using his leadership to survive. Jesus was a well-defined man with a good head on his shoulders, Maggie and I made the deal to get their man back, take on the Saviors in turn getting supplies like medical stuff. We got him and fulfilled our deal, Jesus brought our packages for Denise and the rest into our storage. At night I fixed the log's and took what I could, Daryl helped so that I wasn't sneaking off doing bad things alone. So, much has happened Maggie was taken along with Rosita, but in the end, everything was okay, but we know the issue with the saviors might just be beginning.

Daryl, Denise, Holly, and Rosita are going on a small scouting trip that I was supposed to go on, but here I sit tied to a chair in our kitchen, I was so angry, so angry that I cried as he slammed the door shut. Now I sit here alone a gag in my mouth, I was not a child and right now he was just jealous of some guy. Jesus and I got on well, but he was gay, you could tell maybe he doesn't want anyone to know but I knew it, I was willing to bet. I personally think he and Aaron would make a cute couple, better than him and Eric.

But my boyfriend was tired of me risking my life.

**Flashback**

I liked sleeping in his bed, it had nothing to do with the bed it was the man in it, he had no issue just holding on to me all night. We have not taken our relationship to the next level, but it was only a matter of time until it happened. He dressed behind me as I pulled on jeans and a black metal and rock tour of '97 tee, my old faded brown riding boots are last as I am now ready to go, I wore my hair in a ponytail to keep it from my face.

Daryl gave me a passive look before we headed to have a small meal, just a simple egg on toast for him, I had fresh fruit thinking more weight needed to be shed. "You stay put, love. Just goin to do these dishes up." he was being very caring this morning maybe over doing it a little.

I went over the map yet again, Denise wanted to hit up a certain store which was a little ways away, so with a red pen I traced the best rode to get there and back, time was always working against us, we didn't want many out at once. I was slammed back into the chair like a sack of potatoes I was so confused for a split second, it was Daryl. My brain was saying it was, they're his hands but when I tried to move from the chair his words are low and firm.

"This is for the best." the white silky rope was around my waist. "I am worried enough with these assholes running around, you don't need to be out there risking your life. Sorry you can just be mad at me when I get home." he was tying me up, it didn't hurt but in no way was I going to get loose with my hands tied firmly to the chair, my ankles the very same as he now moved the chair to face the door way.

I yelled, "LET ME GO RIGHT NOW YOU BLOODY, ASSHOLE. WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS!?" letting as much hate and anger flow through my words but anger was something he understood, something he could deal with.

I sniffled, his eyes softened his hands reached to the cords before he shook his head diverting his eyes from my face as tears leaked out, not in sadness but rage. "Let me out of this, this is not how you treat your girlfriend." I pleaded with wide eyes.

He just didn't look at me, using his bandanna to gag me as the knock rattled the front door, the light streaming in alerted me someone had entered. It was Rosita she was ready to go as Daryl stood with a low curse muttered.

She rushed forward, "Untie her damn it, what is your damage?" but she was just held back as he took the map that was folded.

"YOU ASSHOLE!" Rosita pounded on his back in anger, I just struggled trying to get free from my little prison. Rosita tried to get free, but it was Daryl he would just carry her from Alexandria kicking and screaming. She was giving me a look saying how sorry she was, Daryl looked back once seeing me crying.

He whispered. "Sorry, I will be back, and you can hate me then." I hated him now.

I was sore, and my rear hurt after so long, I was going to bash heads soon enough.

The door opened and in walked Carl and Enid. "Fine job jackass." she tore the bandana off, with a stern look she sighed.

I sniffled, it was real I was hurt and sad this time. "Please, un-tie me I really have to pee it has been hours." with a few curses and his knife I was free my bladder bouncing, rejoicing being able to be relieved. As I wash my hands my anger perks up, its nearly five in the afternoon, I have been siting since eight this morning; a whole eight hours.

They were standing by the door when I walked back in, the torn ropes in his hand as he smiled, "We're sorry we didn't come sooner, we thought you left. We were coming to check on the animals." she gave me a worried look as if I would be mad at them

Nodding. "Not your fault nether of you, since I am going to empty a gun into my boyfriend, or ex that was hurtful being tied up you both might be helping more." maybe he thought he be back much sooner, but now my wrist are bruised and cut up.

"He was wrong." was all he said walking from the house with me, I grabbed a tin feeding the chickens and they come running as I make sure they have extra, they were to be fed before we left this morning. They left me fuming, they understood Daryl was wrong it was rash thinking with us not knowing much about the Saviors. So, I just fumed feeding the chicks and checking the gardens, they're so much bigger now with more land. I had three turkeys, two piggies, a vast amount of chickens now but after all was said and done I was storming from the gates ready to wage war all over his backwoods ass.

I saw Sasha walking so I walked up to her side. "Have you seen Daryl?" I asked her in a tone that hinted murder.

She retorted, "No, I am still waiting on Abraham to get back."

We walked around to the front tower, Spencer called down. "Have two cars incoming, looks like they are back." this was good, but when the gates opened Daryl was carrying Holly's dead body, Denise and Rosita running with him. Eugene and Abraham behind them, I just walked with Eugene who gives me a nod.

"Found an industrial factory to make some bullets." he was solemn, but I think he is coming into his own.

I smiled touching his hand, "Great, I would love to help. We brainiac's should stick together we can fight but we know how to do things the others can't." he gave me a smile looking down, I wish Rosita saw him in a better light but right now she was hurt.

"We do."

Daryl never saw me as I walked far back, Holly was gone and would be buried. I watched him walk towards our home, he wouldn't find me there.

I called out, "ROSTIA!" her thin face was filled with relief that I managed to escape my chair.

She and I walked into her room, she locked it. "How did you get out?"

"Carl and Enid came after eight hours, I had to pee something fierce. I wanted to say thank you for attempting to help me, and see if you're okay. I know he left you for Sasha…" I was good friends with her, and wanted to see if I could be with Rosita too.

She tossed her hat to the bed side table while working her thoughts out. "I loved him, and he used me, I know life moves on but how?"

"By not sleeping with Spencer, sorry but he is an opportunist his mother even knew this. I wish I could get you to open your eyes and see a very good man in front of you, he fought for you too. You think Big Red magically came up with that shiner, it was Eugene. He really cares for you; the good and the bad. He is smart, he is caring, and he can be more to the right girl. Maybe you can give him a chance, like a date." she looked at me as if I was a mutant.

I held my hands up. "A date, see how you feel. Just try because I am willing to bet you will enjoy it."

She was sizing me up. "He really punched Abraham?"

"Oh yeah, a sucker punch to the face he was fumed he did that to you." she flopped on the bed thinking, I waited and watched until she gives me a look.

She decided. "Fine one date, tomorrow night."

"Go in with an open mind and heart, he has had it planned already."

She was smiling as I left her there, heading to find Eugene he wasn't very hard to find he was sitting on his porch going over some notes when I walked up taking a seat on the banister.

"So, guess what?" I started out my tone teasing.

He asked. "What?" he was not good at this game.

I smirked. "You have a date tomorrow night, eight at night pick her up at her door. You owe me." he was up his face pale with disbelief.

He retorted. "You're pulling my chain, so to speak." I just sighed.

"She hates your hair, go to Oliva as soon as possible but don't let Rosita see it before your date. I gave Oliva a general idea of how your hair should be, you come and tell me how the date went." he took his notes and walked from the porch heading in Oliva's general direction, with a sigh it was time to head home.

It was peaceful as I walked, I wasn't as mad just hurt he did this, in no way did he have a right too. I didn't see him when I walked in, I wasn't hungry, too upset to eat. I locked myself in my room needing this time alone to think. I did fill the bath up with warm water to rest my sore ass in, the water felt great this was never something I do but it was needed.

By nine I was in my pajamas reading by candle light, I sighed setting my book down when the sounds of heavy footfalls are heard, he wasn't alone, next was Ricks voice at my door as he banged on it. I strode over nice and slow not needing to answer but it was Rick and he was like a father figure, so I unlocked the door seeing him and Daryl.

I asked. "Yes?"

Rick retorted, "We couldn't find ya." now he was smiling at me, but Daryl was looking at the floor.

In a low dead tone. "I finally was released after eight hours of being tied up, I went and talked to Rosita and Eugene, before that I was with Sasha, now I am home." with a slow move Rick was facing Daryl with a disbelieving look.

"You didn't."

"It was for her safety, Eugene is not a fighter and her going with him was putting her at risk." he was holding on to his moral beliefs, his un-rational thinking.

I was so done; my heart was breaking. "I love you very much, Daryl, but you hurt me. I need you to stay away from me. In fact, I am going to see Denise for the marks on my wrist, maybe she has some cream."

Rick was pissed, "No, you stay I will get Denise to come here. Daryl come on." I turned not making eye contact with him as Rick closed my door, but I could hear him yelling even after the door was shut behind them. I just lay in bed sobbing because I was in love with him, soon enough a small knock on my door made me get up but knowing it was Denise made it better.

Her face was filled with pain as she examined my wrist. "Pretty bad rope burn, going to put some ointment on it before I wrap them up. Daryl was fretting about you the entire time, now I know why he was, even why he and Rosita kept going at it."

"He takes protection to far, now every move I make is filled with pain. My rear hurts from sitting in that hard chair for eight hours."

Denise frowned. "Can I have a look just, so I can make sure you don't have a sore form being in that position?" she asked like I might say no to her based on her liking the ladies.

I just stood pulling up my long tee, she sighed. "A small one hold on this is going to be cold on your rear." I tried hard not to jump but it was cold but stung at the same time as she applied cream to it, now I was hungry.

I was alone after she gave me instructions and left, Daryl was sitting on his bed when I let her out, he looked up seeing the bandages wrapped around me, but without another word I relocked the door. I waited and waited until I hear his door close before I came out, little immature but I was hungry, so I made some salad with left over chicken, making my way up the stairs when I hear him.

"I never meant to hurt you, Cami."

"But you did anyways." my eyes filled with tears as I faced him, he saw the pain and was taken back by it, I trusted him. I just shut my door, crying while sobbing into my salad.

Life was never fair…


	11. Beginning of the end

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Two-faced called out. "Daryl."
> 
> "Wow." even gives a chuckle at this.

I looked at Daryl as he stood at Rick's side during the meeting, he looked worse for the wear deep bags hung under his eyes, his face was set in a mask of nothingness. A bible verse came to me, one my mother would say to me many times.

"Song of Solomon 8:6

Place me like a seal over your heart, like a seal on your arm; for love is as strong as death, its jealousy unyielding as the grave. It burns like blazing fire, like a mighty flame."

"The world is ours and we know how to take it." I can't take much stock in Rick's phrase, I sit with Maggie and Michonne.

"That is bullshit, Rick, we have a group of people called the Saviors out for blood. We do not know their numbers, we know nothing about them you act as if we are invincible when we're not." I seethe at him.

Rick only sighs as Michonne speaks. "She is right, but right now we need to find Carol and make sure she is safe."

I agreed, Maggie suggests they create hidden caches of guns throughout the community, to guarantee they'll have weapons in the event of an attack, this we all agree on.

Rosita and I stand outside seeing Daryl on his bike. "He is not right in the head right now, he shouldn't be out there alone." and I agree with her, Rick is right there talking to him. I just watched with a frown, it has been a few days since he and I talked, it hurt every day to not talk to him.

Every day seemed like avoid all contact.

Daryl turned back seeing us watching, seeing the pain that was clear as day on my face but when the gates opened his bike came to life and he was gone just like that.

Rick was not smiling. "Rosita and Cami need you to take a car, and look for any sign of Carol. I am sending Sasha, Abraham, Michonne, Carl, Enid, Glenn, Aaron, and Heath out as well."

I gave a nod as Enid was bolting to us. "Maggie is in with Denise, she fell over in pain."

It was like a mad dash to her home, only to see Maggie getting an ultrasound, "She needs bed rest for a while, it's stress."

"Have her in the room next to yours Denise. Rick, Glenn should stay and care for her, we can bring Eugene instead, he has come into his own and we need to trust him."

Rick was worried. "You rest now, Glenn you take good care of her. We will be back we need to at least try and find her."

Maggie was pale, her skin clammy as she held Ricks hand. "You just come back."

"You're in charge, Glenn."

I was dressed and ready, in a charcoal gray knotted oversized tee, some old destressed low-rise jeans and my brown riding boots, last was my knife. I watched as group's disbanded including us. "She doesn't want to be found, this is a wasted trip, but it brings them peace that they tried to find her."

The lush green landscape passed us by, it was nice. "You're right, Carol is gone. Let's see if we can find some supplies while we're out at least."

I asked. "So, you and Eugene?" poor thing was turning pink.

She waited to keep me in suspense. "It was really nice, he even let me vent until I cried. He fucking got a haircut! Well in the end maybe nerds are better; we are giving it a go."

It would be wrong to jump up and down, but I did do a small dance much to her amusement. "Figured you be happy."

I was he was a great guy. "Pulling off looks like a road block up there."

We entered a small shopping plaza, finding a few things, we sit in the dusty shop eating some stale chips. "Thank you, I know how hard I can be and everything with Big Red just made it worse, but you stuck around."

I snorted. "Thank you for trying to rescue me."

She gave her own snort. "Held my mouth closed until he tossed me in the car, nearly put me in the trunk. He took his fears to far, glad you at least got out."

We set the few things in the back seat as we see some house in the distance. "On foot."

The weather held as we marched through the over grown grass, weeds, and flowers making our way to the three houses', I grab her. "Look to your left." it was four men walking from the woods,

She lets out a low curse. "We might be able to flee."

With a glance over my shoulder we could try, but then we might not make it, it was debatable at this point which was the safer option. "Looks like we are screwed either way, the sun is setting. If we run, they might just shoot us." I moved my knife just hoping to keep it.

A man with dirty blonde hair and a very Harvey Dent looking face walked up to us with a smile. "Hello, Ladies. You're coming with us."

We're out numbered and have no escape as our weapons are taken and our hands tied behind our backs as we're marched into the woods. "Such stunning ladies, sure the boss will love you." his eyes lingering on our female attributes.

Rosita and I stick close together now as whistles are echoed, they're signaling each other. "They're signaling to each other." I whispered, she can only nod.

"Keep waking." not like we stopped.

"Have you seen us stop walking, you are just plain stupid." I snapped out in his anger he made to slap me, but Two face grabbed his advancing hand in midair forcing it to a stop.

He spoke low. "Not on my watch, you fall in line or pay the price."

Rosita give me a nudge nodding with her head, it was a clearing with a fire, now we could see a lot more people waiting. Once we get close enough I can see Enid and Carl on their knees hands tied behind their backs, my rage was coming they are children.

A man says, "On your knees." we stood defiant, but that only lasted so long as a man fisted my hair forcing me down next to Enid, who was crying.

I moved closer, to her whispering. "You will be fine, hunnie. You will survive this, you listen to me; show them no weakness, men crave that, well men like this. You dry those eyes on my shirt, come one Enid, we are scared but give them nothing." her eyes bore into mine even as she wiped her face on me.

"Show them nothing." she repeated when Rick, Spencer, and Eugene are tossed down, next is Big Red and Sasha, this was not happening.

The one I took as a right hand just scoffed at Rick's attempt at negotiation, these men are about surviving not friendship.

Two-faced opened a van door dragging out Heath, Michonne, and Daryl who was covered in his poncho his face so pale as blood poured down his right side. I felt fear, I felt over whelming panic, Daryl was holding on to a thread, his eyes down cast.

I let out a small sob while calling his name is such a low tone. "Daryl…" he heard the sob but not his name, he was swaying side to side next to side next to Eugene.

The leader guy just banged on a door saying. "Let's meet the man." he was not the leader but his right hand.

A guy in his early 40's maybe, with some gray stepped out in a black leather jacket, jeans paired with a worn red scarf. A spiked baseball bat on his shoulder as he walked towards our group.

He had a deep voice. "Hi, you're Rick, right? I'm Negan, and I do not appreciate you killing my men. Also, when I sent my people to kill your people for killing my people, you killed more of my people. Not cool. Not fucking cool. You have no fucking idea how not fucking cool that shit is. But I think you're gonna be up to speed shortly. Yeah." He takes a breath with a slow shake of his head, he closed his eyes for a moment. "You are so fucking gonna regret crossing me in a few minutes. Yes, fuck yeah you are. You see, Rick, whatever you do, no matter what, you don't mess with the new world order. And the new world order is this, and it's really very simple. So, even if you're stupid, which you very may well be, you can fuckin understand it." this man was a killer, early in life he was a bully you could see it shinning through.

He continues, "You ready? Here goes. Pay attention. Give me your fucking shit... or I will kill you. Today was career day. We invested a fucking lot, so you would know who I am and what I can do. You work for me now. You have shit, you give it to me. That's your job. Now, I know that is a mighty big, nasty pill to fucking swallow, but swallow it you most certainly will. You ruled the roost. You built something. You thought you were safe. I get it. But the word is out. You are not fucking safe. Not even fucking close. In fact, you are pegged, more pegged if you don't do what I want. And what I want is half your shit. And if that's too much, you can make, find, or steal more, and it'll even out sooner or later. This is your way of life now. The more you fight back, the harder it will be. So, if someone knocks on your door..." this man loved to hear his own voice.

I was scared no doubt. "You fucking let us in. We own that fucking door. You try to stop us, and we will knock it down. You understand!?"

Rick is shell shocked, he gives no answer.

Negan moves around very dramatic in his movements, making a show for his people. "What, no fucking answer? You don't really think that you were gonna get fuck through this without being fucking punished now did you? I don't want to kill your fuckin people. Just want to make that clear fucking from the get-go. I want you to work fucking for me. You can't do that if you're dead, now, can you? I'm not growing a garden. But you killed my fucking people, a whole fucking damn shit load of them. More than I'm fucking comfortable with. And for that, for that you're gonna fucking pay. So, now... I'm gonna beat fucking the holy hell outta one of you."

"This- this is Lucille, and she is awesome. All this, all this is just so we can pick out which one of you gets the honor." I try and protect Enid my body moving in front of hers.

"Fucking sucks, don't it? The moment you realize you don't fucking know shit. This is your fuckin kid, right?" the bastard chuckles, "This is definitely your fuckin kid."

"Just stop this!" Rick snapped out.

"Hey! Do not make me kill the little future fucking serial killer. Don't make it too fuckin easy on me. I gotta fucking pick somebody. Everybody's at the table waiting for me to order," He just whistles like this is a game and to him it is. "I simply cannot decide." he chuckles again it is a cold sound. "I got a motherfucking idea."

He moves pointing the bat again and again repeating a nursey rhyme, "Eenie... meenie... miney... mo... catch... a tiger... by... his toe. If... he hollers... let him go. My mother... told me... to pick the very best one... and you... are... it..."

"Anybody moves, anybody says anything, cut the boy's other eye out and feed it to his father and then we'll start. You can breathe, you can blink, you can cry. Hell, you're all gonna be doing that."

We screamed as the bat with, so much force came down on Big Red, he was bleeding from a large open gash, but he did not crumble to the ground, he flashed a peace sign to his girl, as we just screamed.

Negan smiled in glee. "Ho! Ho! Look at that. Taking it like a champ!"

Big Red took another hit before he cocked out. "Suck my fucking nuts." then it was a blood bath, he just kept at him the sound makes my stomach turn, the thud, the wet sound of every hit. Enid was shaking like a leaf and at this time I was fairing no better. Daryl was looking at the scene unfolding, he in no way saw me, I was hidden by Rick and Carl, both taller than us.

Negan was laughing now, Abraham was gone, Sasha was sobbing, Rosita was too but her eyes are on Eugene who is also crying. "You guys, look at my dirty girl!"

His people even laugh as Negan moves around again, now to look at us, making his way around his eyes lingering on the females. Sasha, Michonne, Rosita, Enid, and last was me, he was smiling the entire time. "By fucking damn, Dwight you brought me a stunner, nice and thick. What do guys call that, an hour glass figure? Hey, there sweetheart, what's your name?" it wasn't a question either, he moved the bat towards Enid even if it was only a fraction of an inch, I got his meaning loud and clear.

I say. "Cameron." trying to be braver than I felt my words sounding just as I needed them, but one the inside I was screaming and crying.

"Lay your eyes on this."

I just looked him in the eyes, I was not much but I could give a dirty look "That just made me hard, but you should fucking know there was a reason for all this. Red - and hell, he was, is, and will ever be red. He just took one or six or seven for the team! So, take...a damn look. Take a damn look!" I never looked away from him, and in no damn way was I looking at that bat that was now covered in my friend.

"Fuck you." I spat in anger, but it was the movement from the side that caught me, Daryl even injured jumped up.

I screamed trying to get him to stop, "Daryl!" but he was already on Negan, his fist laid into him not once but twice before he was subdued.

Wiping the blood from his face. "That? Oh, my! That... is a fucking no-no. The whole fucking thing - not one bit of that shit flies here.

Two-faced held Daryl's bow to his own head. "Do you want me to do it? Right here." I looked at Daryl, tears falling now, he just looked at me a fact that didn't go un-noticed by Negan.

He spoke. "No. No, you don't kill them... not until you try a little. Now this stunner, and this guy, well I will be some monkeys fucking Uncle. That ain't going to stop me one bit."

"I won't take her now, but I fucking will. And anyway... that's not how it fucking works. Now, I already fucking told you people - first one's free, then - what'd I say? I said I would shut that fucking shit down! No exceptions. Now, I don't know what kind of lying assholes you've been dealing with... but I'm a man of my word. First impressions are important. I need you to know me. So... back to it."

She was gone, my friends gone, she died along side her man and Negan never knew, Sasha and Abraham gone, I just tried to hold Enid as I looked at Daryl, I could see his anger at me not tied to our kitchen chair, I mouthed. "I am sorry, I love you." he was smart, he understood just fine.

"Oh, hell. I can see this is hard on you fucking guys." walkers are coming, you can hear them, they came because we screamed. "I am sorry. I truly am. But I did say it. No exceptions!"

Rick leaves with him, Michonne snarls next to us, but they aren't gone long, and we have no idea what has transpired between them. But the tides have changed, changed for now, we know more know about them we need more people to take them out not down, mercy was not shown so mercy can't be given.

He was going to hurt Carl, Michonne sobbed, "You don't have to do this."

I add, "We understand."

Negan winked. "Not so sure Rick does, sweetheart."

"You answer to me. You provide for me. You belong to me. Right? Speak when you're spoken to! You answer to me. You provide for me. Provide for you. You belong to me, right?!" he goes on. "Right. Right. That... is the look I wanted to see. We did it... all of us, together... even the dead guys on the ground. Hell, they get the spirit award, for sure." sick fuck.

Negan sighs. "Today was a productive damn fucking day!"

Negan touches my face. "Now, I hope, for all your sake... that you get it now... that you understand how things work. Things have changed. Whatever you fucking had going for you... that is fucking over now. You will be mine, might even kill off my other girls for you, sweetheart."

"Get your paws off me, mutt."

"Damn she got some spunk! Ah. Dwight... load him up."

I gasped. "NO!"

"You sweetheart don't belong to him, you're mine."

I paid him no mind my eyes move to two-face dragging Daryl into the white van "That is my girl." he bellowed before the doors closed.

Negan smirked, "He's got guts - not a little bitch like someone I know. I like him. He's mine now. But you still want to try something?"

"Not today, not tomorrow."

"'Not today, not tomorrow'? I will cut pieces off of... Hell's his name?"

Two-faced called out. "Daryl."

"Wow." even gives a chuckle at this. "That actually sounds right. I will cut pieces off of Daryl and put them on your doorstep - or, better yet, I will bring him to you and have you do it for me."

"Ahh! Welcome to a brand-new beginning, you sorry shits! I'm gonna leave you a truck. Keep it. Use it to cart all the crap you're gonna find me. We'll be back for our first offering in one week. Until then... ta-ta sweetheart."

He was gone…


	12. More than half

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A Note: I got a review (on fanfiction.net) she was on point stating that Daryl would not just bunk with some random person no matter if Deanna said too. So, I am going to address it in this chapter, thank you for your reviews they help the story.

Rick was not one to back down but now we had more to lose, I burned the supply logs now so now they will never know how much we have or had. It seems for now Rick is bowing to Negan, but it is not as such, he promised it isn't. I had an idea and was going to talk to Michonne and Rick so they could make this choice together, Judith was not safe here. It had been four days since they killed Abraham and Sasha, we made the choice to bury them here, Maggie was still resting as we hid some guns and supplies.

I tossed on some old jean shorts, blackish gray with a black worn tank top, with bare feet it was time to check the crops progress, Rick was at the door when I tossed it open seeing the reflective light hitting Rick just right. With my bag of tools in hand he offered to get the baskets to the larger section of new crops, just to check but I was sure only some carrots, apple's and some cabbage from my regular garden.

I asked. "Are you really going to bow down to Negan?" hoping he wasn't but I needed reassurance, a lot of it

He gave a low sigh. "No, we will need to play a part until we are able to get more to our cause. We will not be able to take them by ourselves, they have others working for them; now we recruit them. How you holding up?" he just sits with me as I pulled a few carrots, the tomatoes ripe as they spiraled up the circular cage I made.

"I am angry, Rick. But I miss him, ever since he first moved in we have become friends then more, he never struck me as the type to bow down to Deanna." with a fond smile he looks at me, his hand covered mine, he didn't care that my hand had dirt covering it.

Then he chuckles. "Daryl told me you took up for him during his interview with Deanna, said you seemed more like us. Plus, he knew this was our shot for a semi normal life, for Judith and the rest, he would have protested if it had been anyone but you. Your small act of defending his nature when you really didn't know him made him trust you just a little, plus as he put it 'she is just some girl not like she can get one up on me.'" Daryl was not right, I was not just some girl, I was his girl.

I knew Michonne should be here. "I know a safe place for Judith, my brothers have a homestead; it is massive. I rather them not be involved but they can care for Judith, she will be safe there."

He gave me a look. "I will have to talk to Carl and Michonne, but will have an answer tonight."

I am kept company by Enid who alerted me Carl was coming, she was always good with information, like how Maggie and the baby are doing good now. Denise was coming into her own with the supplies Jesus gave us, the most used is now the small ultrasound machine.

She looked over the fence when voices are heard. "They're early." scrambling to my feet to see she was right, Negan had arrived with some of his bastards and a single truck. "Come on hunnie, they ain't goin to let us just go about our day." we make our way from the house to the gathering as Rick was talking to Negan. Oliva, Aaron, and Eric looked to be huddled together talking as we walked up on them.

Aaron was whispering. "Play your part and soon enough we will have the numbers to take them on, they are the worst part of outbreak. Taking from the peaceful, killing innocent friends."

Enid snapped. "Damn right we are, they were going to cut Carl's arm off, they killed two of us, and he threatened Cam."

My arm around her, it was like Maggie and I shared joint custody of Enid. "Calm down, here they come."

Negan could make himself heard. "You don't look at him, you don't talk to him, and I don't make you chop anything off of him. I want you all to stand nicely in front of your homes, while my men and I just do a nice walk through before we take half of your fucking shit."

They are like roaches the worst would survive living off others, Negan walks with Michonne and Rick who try and keep the peace here, but right now we all know a part is played. Daryl walked with Negan, his face was swollen, he was in sweats that are dirty, he was pale and black and blue, all this made my resolve thicken, my resolve was as thick as a Honey badger's coat.

Two-faced was coming he was smiling by the look of him. "Now that that's all settled, I got a job for ya. Go get me Daryl's bike." No chance in hell, it was just Enid and I, standing here, Carl was in front of his home watching from down the road.

I smiled. "Fuck off, it isn't here and I don't know where it is, go run back to Negan."

"You lie."

"Not that you can prove."

He strode into the gate, I could hear a low whistle. "Negan come get a look at this." he was dead, if I killed any it be him. Rick looked worried now as the four of them made their way to my home, but not like they wouldn't have seen it anyways.

Negan was smiling form ear to ear. "Hey there sweetheart, you look fabulous." I just looked at Daryl who was looking at me.

Two-faced opened the gate. "Seems little miss mouth has a goldmine of goods." I just stood tall he was not going to push me around.

They walked passed me. "Come on sweetheart, your home so you can show me around."

I passed Enid to Michonne as I walked behind him, he also gave a low whistle. "You have been a busy girl, take half of everything. Now let's move to the house and see what she has." we did, he had Simon take half of the fridge/freezer he took a good amount of Daryl's belongings, he left mine. His eyes on the pristine condition of my home, even as I stood next to Rick, Daryl was off from us but his eyes swept around.

All my spots stay hidden for now.

"Daryl by god, you don't even sleep in the same room as my girl. Shame such a fuckin shame."

"Simon take Daryl outside, Rick you go too, I think my sweetheart and I just need a few moments alone." his tone was filled with content, humor, and underlining authority. I watched Daryl twitch as he was two seconds from attacking again.

With a cool head. "Daryl, no worries I can take care of myself, Rick everything is fine."

Negan was leaning on the counter. "I am not such a bad guy, sweetheart. Look, I even let you say something to him, he has proved harder to break than I have ever seen. Now, I am going to take you home with me, not today but it will happen."

I just look down my nose at him, he was serious but so was I, if it happened I would do my best to kill him and two-face. "That would be your mistake."

Our eyes locking now, his so cold and dead, devoid of actual life while mine are filled with it. "That just makes me want you more."

I walked from him and out the door seeing them waiting, I stood by Enid and Michonne as Negan laughed. "She is something else, that mouth going to be a problem only I can deal with." he grabbed my arm dragging me closer to him.

Father Gabriel spoke. "The Lord tests the righteous, but his soul hates the wicked and the one who love violence." he came from nowhere.

Negan jumped back, "Ho-ly crap! You are creepy as shit, sneaking up on me, wearin' that collar with that freaky-ass smile, coming here quoting the bible at us."

"My apologies, I am father Gabriel, come Cameron let us move from him." Father Gabriel was still smiling even as he took my hand moving me from Negan who let me go.

"This once, padre I will give you this free pass. Well, this must really suck for you guys. Number one? That was on me. No choice there. Lessons had to be learned. But number two? That didn't need to happen. Daryl, there, he forced my hand."

Father Gabriel spoke again. "You forced his hand, he is a good man protecting his wife."

Negan's eye twitched. I think this little arrangement we have is gonna work out just fine, without the logs they have no clue what we have, they have taken more than half.

I snorted. "I see not a man of your word, you have taken more than half, you should at least be honest with your true intentions."

Rick was trying to keep the peace.

Negan gave me a look. "I am very honest with my intentions, maybe they got a little trigger happy with the gold mine ya'll have. I will leave your beds in good faith since we have taken so much."

I eyed Michonne as they all packed up to leave. "See you real soon sweetheart."


	13. Equivalent exchange

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 'Daryl-
> 
> I know how pissed you will be that I am the one they took in exchange for you, I assume they couldn't break you and needed an excuse to take another from here. Negan knew I would go if that meant you would live and be free to help Rick. You saw their place, so you will have some information, the Hilltop will side with us now that Maggie and Glenn have taken over with Jesus, Georgy is gone. I love you, I hope you know that and understand you are needed here while Rick plans to take them out. All this is just a passing problem; one we will overcome. I will see you again, this not our final goodbye. You gave me all of you and now I can do this, so you can be free to take them out. I assume Negan has plans to kill you before you reach that car, he will want me to watch, but I know how strong you are. Love you dearly.
> 
> Always yours, Cami'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This has many more chapters, as I update on FF.NET I will also do here.

It had been weeks now, without another pillaging they already took seventy-five percent from us leaving us high and dry. Well that would be hard since we stashed so much before they could come, Maggie and Glenn are heading Hilltop after Georgy was killed by Jesus, not something we wanted to happen, but it did and now we make the best of it.

It is dark in my room, a small candle lit as I write my brothers a note.

'Boys-

Stay far from Alexandria, we are being overrun by a group called the Saviors, they will take over you as well if they find you. Secure and kill, I am sending Judith to you to protect; when we are safe I will come get her.

-Cami'

Short and blunt. I sent a picture inside just so they knew it was me who sent it and not some freak, I also gave Michonne private details on each brother that only I would know.

Michonne and Rosita are taking her soon, better to leave in the dead of night when there are no watchful eyes.

I tried not to look at his door as I make my way down the stairs to the front door, seeing Rick just hugging his baby girl as Carl and the girls watched.

His eyes touch on mine. "You sure she will be safe?"

"Safer there than here, my brothers will assume she is mine and I have said nothing to hinder this, they will protect her with their lives." it was true.

Abby would care for her like her own until I come to get her. He just gives me a nod before handing his daughter to Carl who hugged her as Rick spoke. "Judith, you're going to go see some friends, daddy needs you to be good for them. You will be safe there." she would too but the heart break in his voice could make anyone tear up.

"Michonne, you will be taken; you must tell them you are coming from here and need to speak to Frank, Brice, Ricky, Kyle, Bobby, and Mark. Try not to tell them I am in as much danger as I really am, I want them to be safe from the Saviors."

That was three days ago, Michonne and Rosita arrived back, Eugene was happy about this. I heard she got on well with Mark while they rested there.

Michonne alerted me my brothers are in a fury.

No word on Daryl, they came and took what we had until maybe forty percent is left.

Another week goes by when the loud pounding on the gates interrupts our daily life. When the gates open it is merely a few Saviors, Arat is leading them into the safe-zone.

She is grating on my nerves.

Rick is gone with Aaron on a supply run along with Spencer, Eugene, and Rosita. Tara and Heath have been gone for a week already. "We have come with a proposition." she smiled in such a way as Michonne and Enid stood with me, Carl was watching from his window he was being watched so he could not try and leave the safe-zone.

Michonne was not one to mess with. "And?" with the small wave of her hand she urged the Savior to get it said and done.

Arat let her smile drop as she judged the woman in front of her "We take one of your own and in exchange we give you back Daryl. You will see him walk from us as we take…her." with a renewed smile and her gun pointed at me.

Enid snapped. "NO!"

I gave her a firm look. "How do I know Daryl will be let go?"

"You will watch him walk to a car they leave, he will not know it is you that was exchanged for him." this was their only chance to get Daryl, he was needed, he was a fighter.

I turned looking at all my friends. "I will pack a bag, I will go."

Arat smiled yet again. "We will be back tomorrow to get you, here is the location you'll drop a car off and wait here for him."

It was settled.

Enid and Carl milled around my room while I packed a small bag with just a few things. "You two are the only ones able to tend to my garden with Tara, I can try and kill him while I am there. You make sure my animals and garden are safe and well taken care of. I will give you a letter for Daryl, get it to him asap."

I knew they would fight tooth and nail for me to stay but logic was I go and try and kill him, Daryl could help them start this war, they needed the advantage and with Rick, Aaron, and Daryl they would be able to get the upper hand. I could hold until everything went down, I was not a damsel in distress.

Carl and Enid slept in my room with me, but how could I even sleep when in some mere hours I was going to be far from them, far from him, my garden, and my animals with only Tara, Enid, and Carl for company. I stand moving to the desk, so I can write him my note, in private. Or, well, as private as it can get with two teens behind me spooning.

'Daryl-

I know how pissed you will be that I am the one they took in exchange for you, I assume they couldn't break you and needed an excuse to take another from here. Negan knew I would go if that meant you would live and be free to help Rick. You saw their place, so you will have some information, the Hilltop will side with us now that Maggie and Glenn have taken over with Jesus, Georgy is gone. I love you, I hope you know that and understand you are needed here while Rick plans to take them out. All this is just a passing problem; one we will overcome. I will see you again, this not our final goodbye. You gave me all of you and now I can do this, so you can be free to take them out. I assume Negan has plans to kill you before you reach that car, he will want me to watch, but I know how strong you are. Love you dearly.

Always yours, Cami'

The sun was up, all I could do was leave the kids behind me as they are, sleeping peacefully as I take my bag in hand walking from my home. Michonne is at the gate with Rosita as I make it to them, both looked grim.

Rosita spoke. "I am going to go leave the car and wait down the road for him." she could not even make eye contact.

"They're going to try and kill him, no way they will just let him go unharmed, that would be out of character for this group. All I have done is study them and their predictably. He used mental and physical war far, so his movements are the same always. Tear them down by killing someone in a brutal way then tear them down mentally, then they will do your biding."

Michonne gives me such a mothering look. "I don't want you to go, but seems you have made your choice. Find out any information, I have already been working on a plan to get you out so be ready." her arms are strong as she just holds me, I was scared, life there was an unknown. They came with this offer with the soul reason to get me. Negan could do so much better than a chubby country girl.

Maybe I reminded him of a girl, a girl who he loved either before the outbreak or after, but it seems it is before, maybe she died in a way that killed him, he was probably a shitty husband but loved her. At least this is my guess and no way to prove it until I was there and was willing to risk my own life to do as such.

Rosita was gone with a final hug. "I will come back, you take care of dad he is not going to be happy when he returns. Carl and Enid need to check and feed my animals, fruit and veggies picked as they ripen, Tara knows the days so she needs to talk to them as well." I am tired but this was going to be how they survive, Daryl knows my codes, so as she looks at me I debate on telling her as a just in case.

I give in. "On the smaller black remote in the front den, enter 0601 if you run out of food or weapons. Carl, Enid, and Daryl know what's in them. Have no one on the house, this stays between us." now she was giving me a side eye trying to figure out what I have really done.

But our time is done as Arat has arrived, she looked like a rat too, so befitting for her name. I was not hurled into the back of the van but I was helped into it, a seat was waiting, there was no time for goodbyes they made sure of such things. Three others including Wade and Simon are in the van along with Arat and another female I have not seen before; she looked depressed even being here. I watched as Michonne faded from view as the gate closed with Eugene waving until he vanished from sight. Lush green landscape passed us by. The woman in front of me was petite with shoulder length brown hair, she wore a tight black dress with black heels, I watched her as she looked at me with such an immense amount of pity.

She smiled, it was fake. Very, very fake; it hurt just to see it. "My name is Sherri, I will be your sister wife. I am married to Negan, by being one of his wife's you have nothing to fear; you will be protected and loved." her tone was filled with uneasiness.

With a scoff my retort sounded like sass and sarcasm. "Oh yeah, look Sherri we can be friends but in no way will I fake marry that walking piece of shit. I don't need protection." the way she watched me was like she was trying to put a complex puzzle together.

We started to slow down now, we passed Rosita who was sitting on an electrical box her eyes on the van as it passed. I just pressed my hand to the glass as she hoped down, her hand up. I see the car she drove off in lying in wait as the van stopped next to another. "Let him go." this was it, I know I will not be able to get out so I would settle for this, just seeing him go.

Arat was out watching as two-face dragged Daryl from the van next to us, a black bag over his head but after a few feet two-face pulled it off. Sherri and I, watched as Daryl squinted his eyes walking with his hands tied but dropped down his front, they walked to the car when I noticed two-face had a knife pulled out and with a swift move it struck Daryl in his exposed lower back, a wound he wouldn't live from.

Shock tore through me as I stared at the man walking back to the van with blood on his hands, he was smiling as they all patted his back, Simon and Wade out laughing.

"Looks can be deceiving, that man is my husband. He is not dead or even hurt, but Dwight had to make it look as real as possible." her voice so low I had to strain to even hear it.

But I had to try and believe her, this had to be a nightmare but soon we drive off both vans together, I just watch until the car and his body are gone from my sight.

Arat just had to talk, her voice husky like a mans but she was a girl. But like I once said the worst of the worst will survive the outbreak, human nature reverts to the primal instinct to survive.

"Your old man is dead, you're Negan."

"Name is Cameron James, not Negan. I am not his girl and will never be that, he can threaten and do whatever but I will not cave into him." I saw red, she was smiling about Daryl, in her eyes he is dead and she was happy about it.

They never checked me for a weapon, not very smart. We are there, a three-rowed chain link fence protected the factory and main houses of their compound.

God placed the single most important life supply a few millimeters below the most exposed part of the body. It was now or never. I tackled Arat, making sure the blade was wedged into the left side of her neck. I was speaking of the corotated artery in her neck. I only needed to puncture it, and by the flow of dark red my mission was accomplished, her hands fumbling as she tried to stem the flow of blood.

I was yanked backwards, and my blade removed from my hands as Sherri was looking at her husband, her real husband, with some un-said words as Negan walked up looking at the scene laid out in front of him.

Sherri spoke, "Arat, was goading her the entire way, she also didn't check the girl for a weapon." Negan gave her a nod as Wade took her away, not in a brutal way but leading her back to the main house.

Negan was staring at me. "So, glad you could join us sweetheart. Now, now, you already made a huge mistake by killing one of my favorite saviors."

"Tit for tat you sadist ass with a messiah complex, you had two-face kill him."

"Right you are, now come on for your grand tour. You will be my wife, I will keep the others but just as a show of power not for pleasuring purpose. You will have a person with you always, to help. You will dress how I like, but instead of black you'll wear a red dress to show your standing with the others."

"You're insane, I will not be your wife." my voice firm as he just stared me down, his bat nestled to his shoulder.

"You already are."


	14. Tides of change

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Hello ma'am."
> 
> "Hello young man, I am Cameron James."

They have a market place, they have coops and gardens, they could be very self-reliant, but they still terrorize other communities for more and more goods. When they have a decent number of people milling around doing odd jobs, woman and men, I don't see any children roaming around; they are like leeches they have a purpose but still suck everything from you.

Negan just holds tight to my arm as he walks the compound or the sanctuary as they refer to it, it smells like decaying flesh as they have walkers between the fences as a protection. "This is your helper for when I am not around, we found this kid starving and alone." he was about Carl's age, his skin dark his eyes a warm brown color but when he smiled it was pure, friendly, and welcoming.

"Hello ma'am."

"Hello young man, I am Cameron James."

"I am Duane." he seemed charming and very unlike the rest here, he was untainted but only time would really tell if he was. He just tagged along as we walked into the factory where more people roam, a furnace was opened but not blazing with life, it has been used recently by the warmth coming from it.

"This is where we give out punishments to any who deserve it." Negan just droned on and on, pointing as we moved on to another room, my mind trying to memorize anything and everything. I was going to escape and that was the end of it, I was not going to die here.

A room that was lavish to the extreme was next, a room connected to this main one had beds all made, woman sit around all looking dead inside, not even one was smiling. I stand with Duane and Negan, Sherri smiles now moving forward.

"These are my wives you could call it a harem. They understand you're the main wife now, I have a fucking meeting get her dressed and ready for me." this was it, he left with the slam of a door leaving the teen boy and a room filled with women who all came forward.

"You poor thing." a girl that I took has Spanish origins, with her olive skin, stunning eyes and shinning black hair.

"Names Tanya, this is Frankie, and Amber seeing as you met Sherri. Come on have a seat, you want some alcohol. Duane, get her some, hunnie."

I speak, "I don't look like any of you, I am thicker. This is not adding up. I think my perverse idea was right, I remind him of someone important, a way to get them back." rambling a cold glass of amber liquid was pushed into my hand.

Sherri takes a seat next to me. "Do tell."

They gather around me listening, Frankie has ginger hair, a thin face with stunning green eyes. Amber with her brownish blonde hair, she looks similar to me, but skinny. They regale tales of how they came to be Negan's wife, it was a trend, all have been doing this in fear, fear someone they loved would die.

Sherri spoke last, "My Dwight, my sister Tina we worked together to earn 'points' in exchange for supplies; over time, however, we grew to become fearful of the community leader, Negan, due his violent sociopathic actions and oppression. Eventually, Tina fell behind on points and became unable to purchase the insulin which she so desperately required. She was offered the opportunity to marry Negan and become part of his harem, in exchange for no longer operating in a point capacity and therefore always having access to medication. However, acting on impulse, Dwight personally stole the medication he, Tina, and myself fled from The Sanctuary. To our misfortune, we were begrudgingly forced to travel on foot with only a limited amount of supplies as well as a lone pistol for protection. At some point later in the week we three managed to take temporary refuge in the forest which we had previously inhabited. In the end, Tina passed away, and I did the only thing I knew to do, I gave myself to Negan to save my real husband's life." she was sobbing by now, the girls move in and comfort her, they use each other as survival in this world, they are too scared to leave him. But war is coming, and lines have already been drawn.

I mused, "With Sherri, he used his power to create a situation in which she had no choice but to consent. He may find no crime in that—after all, they're "married" now—but in real life, we're capable of recognizing what he's done for what it is. We are not all Negan, after all. But seems he has a pattern and I am not fully fitting into it, his bat is named Lucille, an odd name for it unless he named it after his real wife who he either watched die, or couldn't save. Negan seems to have an unhealthy obsession with his primary weapon "Lucille", a baseball bat wrapped in barbed wire he even has been seen speaking to it, referring to her as if she is a person and asking it to give him strength. Jackass enjoys using Lucille to kill his victims, often using her excessively to install revulsion and terror into others. It is the name of his wife, his real wife."

They all watched a Tanya chimed in, "Finally, some logic in this mess. You need to dress, he doesn't rape but he does, but rape isn't actually limited to what happens when a strange man corners a helpless lady in a dark cell. Consent under duress is not consent. We will try and help you, we promise."

"Who saw Daryl?"

"I did, brutal guy they planned to kill him because he would not break but Negan used your love to get you here without just taking you." Sherri looked at me with that sad look she wore our entire ride here.

Another girl smiled handing it to me. "A Burgundy suede silk, high neckline with shoestring straps, bloused bodice, and asymmetric skirt with ruffles throughout. Buttons closure at center back. These platform pumps with go very well with the dress, your bust happens to be a bit bigger than what he normally likes, so your logic is confirmed. Sorry, I was a designer before the outbreak, names Dina." she tried to be happy, but it was fake. Seems the woman like each other and help each other in times like these.

The dress fit even if it was snug on the girls, the heels are horrible, I couldn't walk. I try and fail try and fail as Duane laughed. "His dad thought he was a goner and left him after killing the walker, but this boy was smart hiding, he had some bumps and cuts, but he is our favorite man here, other than our real men." Amber winked at him making all the girls laugh, I joined in seeing him blushing.

I stood nearly taking a header into the sofa when the door opened, Negan, Two-faced, Simon all stand looking into the room. "Now you look super stunning."

"Dwight, a little blast from the past with you-know-who. Sherri, you and Dwight have a single night, a reward for his killing Daryl and doing a fantastic job."

He was watching my face, I kept a cold mask on when inside I was dying, I had to trust Sherri that he wasn't dead, it was a rouse. "Lucille was your wife, your real wife. I am willing to bet my life, you treated her like shit, you screwed around on her like a bitch in heat, then what maybe saw the error of your ways due to something and tried to make it all better. Then she was gone, she died, and you couldn't do shit about it." talking about a woman who I didn't know, and could have been a great woman was wrong, but I pushed his buttons as he tried to push mine.

He became intense the calmness he walked around with was gone in a flash, he broke his own rule, my face slammed into the floor as Duane rushed to me along with the wives. "YOU BASTARD!" Tanya screamed as Negan took another step back looking at us, I was helped up by two-face.

"I am sorry, Sweetheart you pushed the wrong button." He even sounded sorry.

I didn't grab my face, I cried there was no way to stop that. "There is no black and white in your world, no hands are clean. But even though your wives consent to your proposals and agree to marry you their consent is coerced. So, it's not really consent. In the society you have created at this 'Sanctuary' it's not possible for women to consent freely to marry you. There's no equality in Sanctuary. And a woman that isn't his equal can't freely give consent. As long as you have power over their survival their consent is coerced. In relationships where one person has power and the other doesn't the law says that the powerless person can't consent to a sexual relationship. A relationship between a prisoner and a guard can never be consensual. Similarly, a relationship between a dictator and one of his subjects can't be consensual." my words coming out, taking some form of a stance against him in front of his wives and his men.

"Take her to my room, gag her, and tie her to the bed post this little vixen might just try to escape." but he was angry, he was not calm in the least, the girls looked ready to keep me here.

Simon was not gentle as he dragged me from the room with two-face and Duane who looked ill seeing this, I stumbled nearly falling but Simon kept me on my unsteady feet. Negan's room had a four-poster bed, a hutch, desk, a mix of a bedroom and office, Duane watched his face torn.

"You need to be careful you're hurting her, and Negan will be angry with that." Duane spoke up as two-face smiled.

"Boys got a point, I got it. Duane trust me she will be fine, wait outside." he had no choice as he left his eyes downcast. But two-face pulled a chair over helping me sit as Simon tied my hands to the post, Two-face tied a bandana over my mouth before they also walked out.

I was alone, for a good few hours when Duane walked in a tray of food in his hand. "I brought you food, and a drink. Negan said I could come keep you company, you really got to him." he was super excited about this.

The food was on the bed as he slid the bandana down around my neck. "Thank you, Duane." he had to feed me, wasn't allowed to be untied just yet, so we talked.

He started, "My mama was a walker, she nearly killed me, but I was able to hide under a car as my dad killed her and a few others. There was blood all around me, I could hear him screaming but I couldn't get to him. I tried for days to find him but nothing, I was alone and lost. I know my dad never would have left me, he loved me." My eyes watering again, not from the pain of eating but the emotional pain hearing this teen boy, his words simple it was the emotions he poured into the words that had me.

"I am going to leave here and find my dad, I know he is out there."

"He sounds like a good man, and I hope you do just that. You don't belong here, I know two kids your age Carl and Enid, and Lynn at Hilltop you could all be friends. What's your father's name?" I asked maybe if we ever crossed his path we would know. But this kid was going to come home with me, we could be his family, a good one too.

"Morgan." he smiled this small fond smile.

I balked.

"I know a man named Morgan, he lost a son in Georgia. He came looking for Rick, he is with us."

The fire that hit the boy was instant, "Rick wears a deputy hat,"

I laughed, "His son Carl wears it now." this was a huge chance he and I are talking about the same Morgan, but it was chance we are going to take.

"I can help you escape, we can go see if it is my dad." he stood tall.

I smile, "Go talk to Tanya and the other wives, they're coming too."

The room smells like him, even as Duane has to leave and with his departure my world crumbles.

"You seem to like that kid, I am happy with that. Good kid works really hard, be a damn shame to lose him." Negan paced the room placing Lucille down before pulling a chair to my side. "You are intelligent, I did have a wife, I did cheat and treat her bad. She had cancer when I tried to fix us. She now roams the hospital because I couldn't kill her, I changed since then. You look a lot like her, I loved her in fact she was the only girl I loved. I think you will be my wife, the one I could maybe catch feelings for." his finger stroked the pulsing bruise on my face, his touch made my skin crawl.

I was free to talk now, "You can go to hell." he was a man who should not be pushed, because rules can be broken.

His sigh vibrated around the room, "You will need to be broken in too, you do as I say, or I will bring that little teenybopper here and break her in." this was how he did things, he would give you a choice, but if I turned him down he would take Enid and hurt her, he would make good on that promise.

"Consent under duress." I muttered as a finger of nausea poked my stomach.

He smiled standing up, removing his top exposing his bare chest. The skin on my face and throat was hot, but my fingertips were cold on my legs as I clenched them to stop from screaming. The bastard before me became distorted beyond recognition. I thought I might faint or vomit, but I didn't. I was held up by a feeling of dizzying suspension, like the one I have in dreams where I can fly, but only if I get into some weird position.

At first, he didn't seem to be doing anything but untying me, but that was a short-lived hope that nothing would happen. He presses my lips to his, and they're searing hot. I want to reach the top with him, to kill him, to end the threat to us, to his wives. He turned me over and I heard his zipper before his jeans crumple on the floor. I heard it, even with my face crushed in the bed...Hard and steady on the back of my head, I could feel his fingers tangle in my hair with enough force to rip it out. His palm print on my neck as tears leaked out.

Wrapping his arms around me, he took my mouth with his tongue then teeth as he pulled on my lower lip. He leaned down and licked my neck, stopping at the pulse point before capturing the lobe of my ear.

"Have I told you that I love this dress," he said as he unzipped it, "even better on the floor?" Within seconds, it was pooled around my feet, and I was standing in front of him in only lace panties and my shoes. He stared at me.

"I hate you, you disgust me." my voice broke as did his temper, I was pressed back into the soft bed, his hands so rough and painful, my sobs echoed off the walls of this prison.

"Pain enhances the pleasure." He boosted as he drove into me, his sweat dripped down on me, and I pushed to try and free myself, but I was no match for him. Pain flared on my rear over and over, he fucked me mercilessly until I was crying with the pain and humiliation.

I couldn't sleep, his disgusting arms around me, he acted chipper as he zipped my dress, so Duane could take me to the wives to have female time.

"Tell me you love me." his voice chipper but some new emotion, not love more like he dares me to go against him.

I spat out, "I hate you."

"Tonight, you'll pay."

Hours later Carson comes in with a pill, I take it. "I shouldn't be doing this, but this will ensure you won't have a baby, I will be back tomorrow." then he was gone as I was cleaned up, sobbing in a ball.

"We need to escape; every girl wants to go."

He was a monster and he proves it behind closed doors, hearing his grunts, professions of love, I just try and think of Daryl and the fact I was going home to him.


	15. Reunite

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In every sense of the word most of these men and woman are monsters, they don't kill just for the kill they kill to make points that they're far superior. Everyone here is on a points system and if you didn't have the points you could not eat enough, get enough medication.

In every sense of the word most of these men and woman are monsters, they don't kill just for the kill they kill to make points that they're far superior. Everyone here is on a points system and if you didn't have the points you could not eat enough, get enough medication. I paid nightly for my behavior, my body worn and beaten by Negan, I would not tell him I loved him, he would have me at his side during any meeting making me his lieutenant and keeping a watchful eye on me.

Duane was like my shadow, finding ways to get by Negan and out of the compound without being seen, he was going to sneak the wives out before me, I was not sure how long I was going to last.

Carson tried his best to fix me up every time, but soon just the pill was all he could do. This was simple physical and mental with Negan he was trying to break me, physically he won but mentally was another subject that I could maintain.

"We will be leaving to the Kingdom in the next five, we should have ample ration after. Hilltop and Alexandria have been gold mines, Hilltop is having a slight harder time now." Simon spoke in a low obedient tone never breaking eye contact with Negan as he spoke.

"Good, maybe they need more incentive."

I knew Glenn and Maggie would fight. "Or be leant give them time, using force will not get your way every time. You stand a better chance by allowing them extra time to get more rations, now people are traveling longer distances to get adequate supplies. Time is the issue not their incentive." I never spoke but when push came to shove Negan would take out Glenn or Maggie as incentive, they're important and it would spur the others into action.

Dwight gave a small nod.

"By damn my girl, now listen to her. You tell Hilltop we will be back in three weeks, take nothing today and let them know we are being very kind giving them the extra weeks to get us our shit. Cameron, you can go have some girl time now, run along sweetheart."

He once or twice tried to be sweet or romantic but knowing him made it more cringe worthy. "Thank you, I would like that. Duane come on." I called trying to be polite hoping he just leave me be for a single night.

But in the end, he took it as incentive. "See boys, that is how a real wife acts." I made a move to hit him but caught myself, just making a face before Duane lead me to the lavish room were my new friends sit around and talk about life away from here.

Tanya was the first up when we walked in, I was just tired and in here I could rest as they gave me the pill that was left for me. Amber and Frankie checked me over "He is a damn monster." I just dozed off and on as we all talked over the plans again and again, trying to work out any flaws and where some men and women would be positioned during the time we would make our exit.

Duane thought it best we wait until Negan leaves and try to run then. "Agreed, it has been weeks that I have been here. I can't take much more."

Night came and so did Negan, I could fight back all I wanted, and I did. He professed love and wanting everything to be settled with us, but that I was causing issues for him.

"You will love me, just like the others."

"Those are meaningless words uttered to you, they are scared of you not in love with you." I spat at him earning another bout of pain, rules are meant to be broken.

"I can love you, I can keep you safe you just have to let me." his lips so harsh on mine as he kissed me with what he thought was passion, but it was empty. He pressed his head to mine, "Just give in."

I say nothing, but my mind is flashing with pictures of Daryl, his head pressed into mine as we both taken in each other. I knew now that Daryl was my forever, he was the man I was supposed to be with even if it took an outbreak to bring us together.

The way his hands touched me made me nearly vomit, some girls would think this is their best bet but for me escape was mine. I may be horrible to look at, but I held my head high as Negan dropped me with the girls seeing as Duane had duties right now.

A few wives already gone, hidden in a house Sherri gave to Duane, we had to act soon or he would notice. We huddled together. "Today has to be the day we all leave." Frankie was worried since we all would pay the price of them being gone. I couldn't even sit everything was so bruised and battered.

"Frankie, chill we all are getting out now it's about the rest slipping out. I will be the hardest to smuggle out." we couldn't panic or we would lose sight of our goal.

A small jingle on the door knob had us all acting as if nothing happened, Negan walked in with Dwight but behind him was Carl, I forgot where I was at when I rushed to him. He moved to me but his face was filled with heart break. "No, no, no sweetheart."

I pleaded, "Please, Negan. Let me talk to him." I hated asking him, pleading like I was desperate, but fuck it I was.

Negan gave a smirk, "Sweetheart, tonight you owe me. Carl why don't you have a little talk with my wife." Carl nearly snarled at the older man. "Guts this kid has balls as big as mine."

I tugged Carl to me, his eyes moved over me. "Don't worry, I am healing, I miss you so much, and Enid. Why're you here?"

"I killed two of his men, it has been weeks I was trying to come get you." he was lying, he was the distraction, someone was with him.

I held him close. "He is beating you?" innocent and I was about to ruin what innocence he still had.

"More than that, you need to go home Carl. Okay, you can't be so rash, think and then act, I can't lose you too." so much pain filled my words as Negan had enough, Carl understood me just fine. Amber helped me to move since every movement caused pain.

"I will kill you for hurting her, my sister." Negan just smiled at the threat Carl made.

We all watched as Negan bent down "So, this is Ricks daughter." he took it as fact, he bent whispering something and that something made Carl jump trying to strangle Negan, I rushed pulling Carl away.

"Just a boy you leave him the fuck alone, you take him home, Negan. Please." pleading with my eyes.

"Sure thing."

I even got to watch him personally taking Carl home from the window, Duane walked in soon after. "Time to go." this was my chance and the first time he has left. We slip out heading to the back of the main house so we can slip into the rear of the factory and out of the fence.

We are nearly at the factory when Jesus turns a corner, his eyes met mine before I launch myself into his arms sobbing. "We have to go now."

"You might want to hurry, once Negan gets back there will be hell to pay. Sherri, he is going to send me to kill you. I have a dress and a girl who looks enough like you hidden, I will find you." Dwight stood against the gray wall watching us all trying to escape.

I held Sherri back. "We have to go."

She hugged and kissed his scared face, then we were gone with Jesus as Duane took the rear. "We found them girls, and they left that note. We have them hidden at a place called Oceanside." we hiked through woods with heels, I was thankful when Jesus stepped in carrying me.

"Thank you."

"Negan messed her up, she can barely sit." Tanya huffed her palm against a tree as we took a breather.

"Joleen and Tara are waiting at Hilltop they will get you to Oceanside by nightfall, but Cami you will not be safe at Hilltop. I have to get you to the Kingdom."

"Let's do it, can we be there by nightfall."

A truck was waiting, "We will be, they will be safe at Oceanside as well by tonight, we will have little time to hide you." I was seated and he was driving off taking the back roads back to hilltop, we aren't; very far since I can see it after a two-hour drive, I prayed Negan had not found us missing by now.

We are out as Tara and a mixed girl stood by another truck with Glenn, who moved fast hugging me close. "My god she needs a doctor, Daryl is going to do something stupid."

Maggie was rushing over. "You're safe." was all she got out as we hugged like we haven't seen each other in months, just holding on to each other.

"I need to hide, Negan will find us all gone soon."

Tara was helping woman into the van that the Joleen girl was driving. "See you at the Kingdom, I am dropping them off and coming to see you before I get back to Alexandria." her hand in mine as words are unspoken, her eyes traveling over me.

The Kingdom was a high school, but it was large and held another community, Duane and I walked in with Jesus.

"Jesus, who do we have here?" A tall man with graying dreadlocks smiles at us, he was leaning on a staff with a pudgy but very happy looking man to his right, on his left was a man who looked tired with a five o'clock shadow.

"King Ezekiel, this is Cameron James and her friend Duane, she needs to go to the cottage. Carol can care for her, Daryl will be reckless if he sees his girl in this state, you can question her there not here." my heart picked up as my hands clenched my torn clothes, he was here, I needed him. But him seeing me would just hurt him.

"I have to go; the Saviors will be on their way hunting her."

"I will die before I go back."

King Ezekiel and Jerry rushed me away, covering me and helping me walk, it was too far though. I stopped needing to breath. Holding up my hand. "Need to rest." Jerry was having none of this with so much gentleness he swooped me into his arms moving faster.

King Ezekiel spoke, "I was looking for a reason to see Carol. No better time than now." seems someone is smitten with her, I even missed her.

"Is Morgan here?" my chest tight, the pain was getting worse as a small cottage was nestled into the woods, a small gate around it, made of jagged iron. Duane and the King moved in front of us knocking on the wooden door, it took only moments that felt like an eternity before the door opened, she looked pissed until her eyes landed on my broken form nestled into Jerrys arms.

Like a whip her voice cut through the air. "What happened, get her in here!" her home was warm, a small shock of pain as I was put on the sofa.

"We can send Morgan to you, if you so desire young Cameron." King Ezekiel took a seat while Carol and Duane fussed over me.

"What haven't you lot told me?" her eyes like daggers at Jerry and the King.

"Abraham, Sasha, and Holly are all dead, Negan bashed their heads in, a group called the saviors have taken over Alexandria like Hilltop, and the Kingdom. They took Daryl hostage for weeks, but when Negan couldn't break him they tried an exchange. I went in his place, Negan made me his number one and real wife as he put it. Every day, every night I was, well you know there is a child here." short and to the point, Carol let the tears fall I may not have said everything but enough was said in the end.

She snarled out, "We need to fight, men like them will take and take until there is nothing left to take. They will kill, and they already have, here, hilltop and Alexandria. I am fighting, you lot better get ready, send for Morgan and Daryl but don't tell them why. Hate for my boy to see his girl like this but he is self-destructive right now and knowing she is here will help him and her."

I just wanted to sleep but after they leave she just gets on her knees. "Did he?" I knew what she was asking.

I answer, "Yes, consent under duress. He was going to kill Enid and Duane if I didn't." maybe she understood much more than I expected her too, I knew nearly nothing about this woman she kept her secrets guarded.

Her eyes hard but filled with warmth and understanding she stood looking down at me. "Let me get you some clothes. Why did you need Morgan?"

I smiled, letting the pain flare. "This might be his son, I am hoping that I am right." it was a slim chance, but in this world chance and luck are key players. Duane smiled as she stared at him probably trying to find the similarities between them, I saw some and maybe she did too.

"You watch her."

He did just sitting by my legs telling me about his mom and dad, his life before the outbreak, he was just a kid tossed into this world. I told him about my family and how I was a teacher, a fact he actually liked. Carol returned with a pair of shorts and tank top for sleeping but right now moving was a task, a task I was not going to do until my body was ready to get up.

Darkness came as I finally moved from the sofa heading to the bathroom, Carol was with Duane making a stew for supper every movement was like walking in mud after being hit by a truck. I was sore but this was not going to hold me back for long.

I sobbed taking off my clothes needing a shower, Carol must have heard me the door opened and she walked in locking it behind her.

The way her face hardened as she spoke. "You need a shower and some food, after sleep. No one here will hurt you, I will not let another man do this, ever. You understand me, Cameron?"

Sobbing was about all I could do, she just rubbed my back until no more tears came, just dry sobbing until that too eased off. "Is Daryl okay? It has been months since we have seen each other." my burning eyes find her green eyes.

A few moments go by as she turns the water on., with a sigh she answers. "He is hiding at the Kingdom but that isn't lasting, he has been so self-destructive. He blames himself for you being taken, but then he is pissed you took his place; that you find his worth more than your own. He has been killing any Savior he can, trying to find you."

"Jesus and Carl, they infiltrated the Sanctuary, Negan took Carl back to Alexandria and we escaped with the help of Dwight and Jesus. All Negan's old wives escaped to Oceanside, and I came with Jesus here."

"I am going to finish supper, you just get clean. You call if you need help." she was near tears, she tried not to show it but something was affecting her, she shut the door behind her. The water was warm against my cold pale bruised skin, I washed but it felt like my body was swaying on the spot, I stayed in the shower a few more minutes making sure my hair was also clean. Like always when I step from the shower it is like a winter chill hitting my bare body, in this I wasted no time drying off and getting the clothes on. It hurt, it really did but I was dressed and any mess cleaned. Honestly, I felt a little better now that I was away from him and clean, another thing deep down I knew she was tellin the truth no one would hurt me here.

I was a weak link, everyone scrambling to protect me, ma, pa, brothers, Rick, Daryl, Jesus, and Daryl. I could farm but I needed more now, to be like her, like Carol. Walking back through the small hall it was so much warmer, the fire going when a knock is heard and a scared Duane is sent my way, I just shove him behind me.

But it is his voice, gruff and annoyed. "Jerry, sent me over. I don't have time to be sitting here knitting with you, my fucking girl is out there." the feeling of my heart dropping into my belly in tattered pieces make my knee's quake.

"Boy, you are going to get yourself killed, is that goin to help her any? No, it will not."

"This ain't your decision. Wasn't nobody's fault but mine. Just let me finish my smoke first then I am going to stomp Negan's ass." he would too, hiding behind a wall, fear held me this was not the time for some weak moment, he was right there.

With Duane's hand in mine we walked out into the living room, Daryl's back was facing us, same as Morgan. "You ain't going to go off stomping anyone's ass, at least not without me." My voice weak, my tone just tired but the way his body tensed up before he spun on the spot, his eyes going wide as his face just crumpled. I have never seen him cry but he was, his body slamming into mine, the pain flared but I held him even as I held Duane's hand.

"You're hurting her, Daryl give her a good look." when he pulled away his eyes moved over every inch of my body that was visible. But behind him Morgan was on his knees also crying, I let Duane go every bit of pain was worth it seeing Morgan and his son reunited both holding on for dear life.

I could feel Daryl; his body was shaking. "A body can heal." but in time I would have to heal my mind as well but right now the best thing to do was push everything down, war was here. By now he has returned and found us all gone, in reality I was dead scared of him more so now knowing his wrath will be beyond anything we have seen.

He watches as I stand and eat a small bowl of food, while they all sit. "Please, sit." he spoke low and everyone tense but loving. I moved to the chair by his side my eyes already watering when Carol stood up moving over to me.

"Can you sit?"

"I can." trying to smile.

Duane bless his heart. "It is real painful for her, Negan beat on her. But she got him good too ya'll should have seen it she torn into him."

Morgan just touched his head in a joking way, but his face was serious. "Come on let me look you over." in his tone was worry and don't give him shit so all I could do was set my bowl down, he wrapped his arm around me leading me into the back room it was small and comfy looking.

"Take your clothes off." he wasn't joking.

"Daryl. Will this somehow help you, to see every mark he made? If you're checking on my wellbeing then fine I will but if this is about him then no."

He says nothing, just presses his head to mine and for a split second I wanted to pull away but he was not Negan, warm feelings when he and I are like this. "I have to make sure you are okay. You have no clue how I was feeling, how I was doing. You gave yourself to him to get me out, I knew deep down it was you he took. That bastard will pay in the end." I started to remove the clothes leaving them on the bed, his eyes so cold and calculating but his hands so gentle turning this way and that way.

Then he was helping me into the bed pulling the quilt over us, he just held me close, my body running along his with my head nestled in the crook of his neck. "I am going to kill him, he violated you, beat you, and I can only imagine anything more. You sleep now, I am here and nothing is going to happen."

"I love you." I whispered into the darkness feeling him relaxing.

"I have never loved anyone the way I love you, you are my life." safe, warm, and falling into the darkness.


	16. Hide and Seek, Bitches.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> His deep voice broken into my thoughts, "You're in pain, we ain't keeping secret's, woman." angry, he was angry as I stood.

I was in bed a little later in the evening with my body just too sore to get actual sleep, but Daryl just laid next to me. His body was tense, and the silence was for the first time thick with anxiety. He suggested a tank top with the issue of Carol and Morgan coming in and checking in on me every so often, Morgan alerted us Duane was in the attic hiding in the small bedroom. It was very well hidden even I walked by it many times after our arrival and never even noticed it, that brought a safe feeling since he was also in high danger.

Morgan left over two hours ago to give the Kingdom an update when Carol went to lay down knowing we're awake and able to keep watch, unsaid words between Daryl and herself told me he knew her past and why she was so caring to me right now, not that she was not like that normally. His voice broke though the tense darkness. "I need to know what happened." this was not what I wanted to talk about. But with him it was just best to tell him and deal with him after, he wasn't about to run off.

I was on my side his arm just draped over me. "I will tell you, but this doesn't give you leeway to run off to stomp his ass. Look Daryl, you can guess what happened but because you asked here it goes, this might help me recover mentally to tell someone." taking another steading breath. "Arat came and offered you for me seeing as how Rick was not there. Knowing he would have just punched her for even trying. But it was logic, you're a warrior and I am not as needed like you are." his hand covered my mouth stopping me from speaking.

"It was you who hid goods, you who grew enough food for three towns. You and a few others who held Alexandria at bay from the Wolves and a horde of walkers, you don't get to think like that. Not you, you're a solider." he just made me feel better, his word's not entirely book smart but still smart at the same time.

"I left with them, I watched as two-face killed you, all in show but still it killed me because who could be trusted was not known. I killed Arat before we reached the Sanctuary. He was a monster no easy way to put this, I figured out about his wife, his real wife, Lucille. The reason he has an un-healthy obsession with his bat. Before the outbreak she got cancer and passed as the outbreak happened. He tried when she got sick to fix their marriage, he cheated on her and a bunch of other issues. Well, he couldn't kill her when she came back to life, he went back after a few months and did it. But now he is an evil shell, he beat the hell out of me for bringing that information to light, he used Enid and Duane as leverage to get what he wanted, they don't rape but will kill and use what you care or love to get your consent, which is called consent under duress. It was like hell those long weeks that I was gone, knowing Duane was sneaking wives out making a small light shimmering at the end of the tunnel was my only life line at those dark times. Bad things happened and you knowing will not change it, will not change the outcome but it will make you angry, sad, hurt so many emotions that Negan would like for you to feel." his face was already filled those emotions, his understanding of that place, that man and adding in the way I looked was enough for him to get the gist of my pain. He was silent for what seems like an eternity as I lay beside him just resting, he looked to have aged three years with puffy bags under his eyes.

"He needs to die, I know how that place is run, even met one of his wives, Sherri. She gave me a warning about Dwight, he agreed to fake my death because he used to be like me before all this shit with that bitch, Negan. Rosita, I knew by her face when I arrived covered in dyed corn syrup it had been a setup she sobbed and told me it was you they took in my place as I drove to Hilltop, then I was taken to the Kingdom. I found Carol a few days later, she took you being gone hard and vowed to help but Morgan and the rest never told her the fucking extent of the issues we are facing." I listened to his voice it had a rough edge to it, but I just relax a little at a time.

Now it is silent as it gets darker, I fall into a fitful sleep his arms like iron around me, we have so much left unsaid but with the steady beating of his heart I was gone.

I woke to a smell, light shined down on us, my face was buried into his arm pit, very gross. Shifting in bed trying to move from the bed feeling stiff and sore. "Morning." his arms moving to help me up as he came around the bed, his long hair messed up as I yawned.

"You need a shower, baby."

A real smile replaced the pain he wore. "I missed you saying that, Carol left some clothes for you. I can help get you dressed."

I waved this off, "You shower pigpen, I can dress myself." he just chuckled leaving me to dress while he showered. I was still so tired, but I try and dress, each movement brings pain to the surface, it will get better there is no doubt about that but for now I could handle that. Naked when I sit back down on the bed, needing a few minutes before dressing personally I think I am doing better today having removed all my clothes and made the bed before needing to sit.

I was a mess, why try and kid myself, I was mentally a mess my hands shaking, my brain having flash backs that set me on edge around Daryl. I should go back to Bama and be with my brothers and heal mentally and physically, but knowing he would follow me was the single thing stopping me.

His deep voice broken into my thoughts, "You're in pain, we ain't keeping secret's, woman." angry, he was angry as I stood pulling on the jeans that I loved, my bra and a warm gray sweater before resuming my seat to pull on my boots. Someone brought me clothes, these were in my bag, Jesus was the last I saw with it. Daryl was a good man, he was cut up, but he was clean as I moved towards him when the door flew open, Carol was pale white.

She snapped, "Get her to the attic, you too. Saviors." I balked in fear, tears starting to leak out as Daryl just dragged me into the tight entrance. Carol, sealed it behind us, we could hear her and Morgan talking, as we couldn't move, Duane was next to me, also shaking.

"Clam down, nothing is going to happen. I will die before they take you." his voice so low as his words are whispered into my ear as he just holds me close, Duane was now in my arms as a pounding was heard on the front door.

Breath held, heart pounding.

"Good Morning Carol, I am sorry to intrude so early but seems the Saviors think we are hiding a girl at this outpost. I am sorry they will need to come in and give your home a check." it was King Ezekiel, his voice cheery, polite, but lanced with worry and hate.

Her voice was firm and annoyed. "I suggest they get on with it, we don't have all day for them to be bastards. I run this Kingdom out post and having the likes of them here."

"Oh Carol, always so welcoming." it was Jerry by the tone he cut her off mid-sentence.

"Now, look. I am looking for my wife, long silkily brown hair, wide green eyes, thick girl probably looking messed up. I am going to find her she might not be here, but I love her and don't want her hurt. Now move your old ass out of my fuckin way." he was here, he came looking himself every nerve was on fire, my body reacted shaking and trying to move far from the voice. Daryl just held me tighter placing a kiss to my forehead as I nearly tried to hit him, fear was powerful.

When I was a kid, I went to a special school for gifted people, some kids my age and some in their teens. I was scared there, men in Army uniform, white coats walking all over the place, one day I was taken home hearing my oldest brother yelling at ma and pa. He was in the Army at the time, I remember him saying I was being used by the government, that was the first time I felt fear. Now it is the only emotion that I can feel, hearing them, hearing him walking around. Daryl, just held me, his hands moving trying to keep me calm but that was not about to happen.

"Oh look, no girl hiding from you. Now get the fuck out." Carol had had enough.

"Carol, please. Negan, you have torn our post up and have not found this girl. We want no issues with you nor have we hidden her." King Ezekiel had a jovial tone as he spoke to Negan trying to keep the peace. Daryl was listening to every word, I was being selfish, he also went through hell there, Duane too. I just put my head under his chin with my arms around Duane, he just held tighter his hair covering my nose, a hint of honeysuckle and cream.

"You keep a look out, I want her back. She needs a lesson just like her Daddy, Rick." god he would kill me.

"We of course will work with you to find your beloved wife, we need to stick together in this new age."

Daryl moved over the larger beams to the very small window, watching them leave. I just curled up sobbing hearing the door being opened five minutes later, they gave them enough time to leave before they let us out.

Duane was the first out, next was Daryl helping me move, this was good move through the pain, it would help strengthen my body. "I am sorry, Carol. I think it best we leave, he will return." I felt horrible they knocked her things down, tore her art leaving it on the floor, beds unmade, but my dress that was torn was dropped on top of my now unmade bed.

Carol was about to tear me a new one when my voice cracked. "Who looked in this room?"

"The one with a burned face, Dwight, if I am correct." that was my saving grace, Daryl closed his eyes.

"Burn the dress." the King walked in snatching it up and leaving the place, I watched as he placed a kiss on Carol, she swatted his chest. I smiled, watching her walk back in. "Say nothing young lady." but she was smiling as we cleaned her place, everything was fine after. Daryl was watching from the window, Duane was reading, same with Carol, Morgan was with Daryl.

I helped cook dinner, trying in vain to clear my thoughts when arms wrapped around me. I knew his smell. "I love you very much Daryl, you are the man I want to spend the rest of this life with. I am just messed up right now, it will take time to heal mentally." the rabbit was frying with a handful of chopped veggies and instant rice. Not the best but it was filling and good, I added the dried seasoning as he just nuzzled my neck.

He answered. "I have to go once it is dark enough, Morgan and I are going to Rick via Hilltop. I will be gone a day at most, I am here for you, might not be helpful. I am going to kill them all, I will not lose a night's sleep over this either. You're mine, my girl, my world you are at the very center of everything now. I never thought I would want to settle down but here I am wanting that life with you. Yet, hell, I can't do that fuckin shit with Negan." I turn.

"You comin' back right." I in no way wanted him to go, Carol just started plating dinner giving me a nod.

"Nothing will stop me."

"Eat and go, the sooner you leave the sooner you'll be back."

It was dark at 7:30, stars littered the nights sky, Carol said she was going to bed at five, she was going on night watch. Duane and I kept watch as his father and my man walked out the back into the dense woods of the Kingdom. Jerry waved walking with them, I gave a slight wave until they vanished into the darkness, Duane and I just sit on the sofa, looking out the curtains every so often, no matter what he was happy, happy to have his father back.

"Daryl said he is going to stomp Negan's ass." I smiled when Duane alerted me of this, his tone low but lighthearted.

"He will too, that's why I have to keep an eye on him."


	17. Storm brewing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I will have to visit my pain. My fear. My weaknesses. My nightmares and demons. The skeletons lurking in my closet and the horrific possibility of self-disclosure, even if veiled.
> 
> Because, as I well know, that's where the frozen sea inside of me is. If you are ever going to crack the ice of another person's soul, you have to be brave enough to go first. To be a witness. A testimony. An example.

I will have to visit my pain. My fear. My weaknesses. My nightmares and demons. The skeletons lurking in my closet and the horrific possibility of self-disclosure, even if veiled.

Because, as I well know, that's where the frozen sea inside of me is. If you are ever going to crack the ice of another person's soul, you have to be brave enough to go first. To be a witness. A testimony. An example.

I sit on the sofa curled into a ball, it was like a horror movie outside. The sky became dark and low with ominous black clouds and the wind picked up, howling, crying, warning, baying like a wolf into the night. The first crack of lightening hit the air and within seconds the rolling boom of the thunder reverberated overhead. Soon the rain fell, slow to start, splattering the dirt road haphazardly. Then it fell as if from buckets, cascading like a waterfall from the heavens. It pounded on the roof as if it were demanding entrance. Again, there was a mutter of thunder from the blackened sky as the wind tore leaves from the trees.

He was traveling in this, but he had been gone with Morgan for hours now, he was very likely safe at Hilltop. I could see the sun trying to poke through, but it was a battle the bright shining sun was about to lose as the storm had full control, even as the clock chimed it reached six in the morning. Duane and Carol would soon be up, so might as well make some eggs, being here makes me miss my home, my animals, my garden and the fresh food it wielded. These are fresh eggs and pork, but he was lacking in food since we arrived, but Jerry said he would bring her more supplies.

The pitter patter of the rain pouring down was all I could hear, silence could be very tricky making you see or hear things that would never be there with the chatter of others. Now the sizzle of the eggs hitting the hot pan brings more noise filling the emptiness.

My stomach was sour, I moved plating the fluffy scrambled eggs as they both walked in looking refreshed and ready for another day. "Morning, Carol. Duane did you sleep okay with the storm brewing?"

Carol retorted, "A storm is good it will halt the Saviors, I am sure the boys made it to Hilltop just fine before it started." she sits but she looks worried all the same, Duane is already eating, guess the fear of not having enough points have finally faded from his mind.

"You need to get a little shut eye, Cami." she was right, but I was scared to sleep, the silence returns as the scraping of forks are the only thing heard.

"Duane, you will be getting a lesson later in the day. Education is still important."

"Yes ma'am." at least I could help him in some way.

I did need to lie down though, I was dizzy and my body still trying to recover as best as it could. Still in my boots, jeans, and sweater I curl up on the bed smelling him all over his pillow. The storm was soothing in its intensity but even when I closed my eyes I see Negan, hear the words he would mutter in my ear as he thought I slept, even the feel of his paws on me are still there, like they never left.

The sweat was building as my heart raced, he was not here, he was not here was all I chanted like a song.

Feeling the heavy sensation of my eyes drooping close when the door burst open, Duane with two bags crashed through the door. "Jerry said Saviors are coming, we have to leave, they are making sure to take shelter here during the storm, with some at The Kingdom. Here is a bag, we have to go out the back now." I was up slinging the bag over my shoulder, Carol was red in the face.

"You get to Hilltop, or Alexandria, or your brothers, in fact get to your brothers. I will send Daryl that way." she was shoving us out the door into the rain. He was bundled in a thick black winter coat, I pulled mine on, the hood providing some relief as we hit the woods behind the house, we had no time to stop. I couldn't get to my family's farm, no map. I wasn't even sure Hilltop was going to be found but for now we just have to get distance between us and the cottage.

The mud was thick as we traveled through the day, Duane was tall like Carl, he was not a little boy like I kept thinking. His voice was deep too, "Did you hear that?"

I did.

"I did, we need to move faster," but it was not that easy the storm was making everything worse, we are chilled to the bone, walkers roam but as long as we're silent they stay hidden.

Duane was looking around when his eyes grew wide.

"Negan, its Negan. He had to come from that road we passed, maybe he saw us." this was how we found us running through the pouring rain, the thick mud both falling and getting right back up and running again.

"YOU CAN RUN BUT I FOUND YOU." his voice demented as it rang clear over the rain, he came from the woods we are done for. Behind us is a small cliff and a river below, in front was Dwight, Wade, Simon, and Negan.

Lucille was on his shoulders, his face was like a nightmare, cold, demented and pissed. If he caught us we are both dead, well I was just going to get hurt while he killed Duane in a brutal way. Fog it swooped in and skirted around the men and the trees, like a giant eraser moving indiscriminately to eradicate what was once there into something that's not. We all stood in a pocket of it, but it only seemed like a pocket to me. I knew that we too are swallowed, erased, eradicated by this enveloping whiteness. It hurt my eyes, it was so white. Staring at it made me feel like I was staring at myself staring at nothing. My mind fought hard to drum up a thousand-different description to plaster across it. But there was nothing that could truly describe nothing. Each thought I had seemed loud and exposed, just like every movement she made in the silence that wrapped like the fog around us.

Dwight looked more worried now, my eyes moved back to Negan's, he looked like the cat that trapped the mouse. He was not as composed as normal. "Get the hell over here right now, come now and the boy will live, might be limping, but he will be alive." he was serious, the way his voice came out was like every nightmare come to life.

Duane gave me a look; his voice shook and broke as he looked behind us over the cliff to the churning waters below. I was freezing my hair plastered to my face "We got to jump, don't think we have much of a choice now. He will hurt you really bad this time, and me they might leave me semi alive." he was right, I would never see Daryl again if we gave up. He held his hand out to me, I clasped it the fall wouldn't be too rough, I've done worse jumps.

Negan saw what we planned, he charged forward. "DON'T YOU DARE!" Duane and I jumped, the air was cold, but the water was below freezing, his hand slipped from mine as we swam upwards, I struggled under the water until my head popped above the water seeing him near the river bank. My body on the verge of giving up but I had to make sure Daryl was okay, I struggled my arms heavy as Duane hauled me into the dirt.

His voice bellowed down. "GET HER AND KILL THAT KID, NOW!"

I gave him a look, "RUN!" and we did taking to the woods our feet pounding into the dirt, the trees thinned out and a clearing was seen, next we saw an old ford. I was in trying to use what little knowledge I had of stealing cars to use, with the wires cross it started and had gas, not a filled tank but nearly half as Duane and I drove off heading to anywhere but here.

"I got you, Duane. I can keep you safe." I smiled, hoping beyond anything that I could.

Daryl's point of view…

I stand with Rick and Jesus when Benjamin walks through the gates of Hilltop, I stayed gone two days longer than I should have, she needed me, but we have the upper hand on the coming battle. I missed Cameron, everything about me was worried about her, I have seen girls like her before, after they get abused.

"Saviors came with the storm, Duane and Cami escaped, but guess Negan caught up with them. Carol is at the Kingdom; King Ezekiel was able to convince Negan she had nothing to do with it. Carol is now joining the search for them, it's been two days and we have no trace, we lost them at the cliff side, it looks like she and Duane jumped, and no sign of them getting out of the river bank either." my heart hammered in my chest, she was gone.

Rick just choked his eyes watering as Morgan just looked to change, his facial expression turned evil. "That mother fucker is going to die, every Savior is going to die. They have taken everything from us, now they have taken too much. She was all I had. The line must be drawn here! This far! No farther! And I will make them pay for what they have done." I couldn't help but compare the night with my own state of mind. Just like those clouds, my insides were in a chaos. A mess. Something was bothering me. Something was hurting me. Something ached inside me.

I sit by myself, away from Maggie and Glenn who are both in mourning, Rick in shock, he left to break the news to his family. I lay on the ground, my face closed in a grimace, my skin is pale and clammy. Every few minutes I would scream, not like one of those guys in some Tarantino movie being tortured, but worse. It had a raw quality, the realness of a person consumed by a pain that knew no end or limit. Then I would go quiet, just panting. I should have been there at her side, at least then she would have known I cared that I loved her more than anything. But instead I walked away to come here.

"He is goin to pay, Cami."


	18. Escape and new friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> New friends

The wheel was cold despite the warmth in the cab of the truck. I drove just heading in a direction that I knew was away from the river and Negan. It was me, my hands shaking uncontrolled, we shouldn't have survived the waters with the intensity, but someone up there really likes us. A harsh storm was upon us, but it was light out now, which means he will send more and more to look for us, he will travel farther as time went on. But for now, getting Duane and myself far from him was my only goal, Hilltop, Alexandria even the Farm is a no go, those would be being watched my heart just hoped Daryl was never found.

More than once we had to stop and find gas, as we got further away gas and food became a little easier to find with many small towns interweaving together. Duane was a gas siphoning expert. I would watch out and collect what food there was to be found. Kentucky was far but still, we needed more and more land between us. So, when a large sign reading Montana was seen, I figured we traveled far enough, for now, we would have to travel back to Virginia and help them out, fear drove me to drive this far.

I turned to Duane. "I think we drove far enough, that town looks good enough to bunker down in, looks to be sectioned off though." my words stopped when the truck was surrounded by a group of ten maybe, all armed.

"We might be in some trouble, Cami." Duane whispered with his hands held high in the air.

The tallest guy I've ever seen yanked the door open, his pale blue eyes roaming over us before he lowered his rifle. "They ain't armed, it's a kid and a young lady." his voice called back as one by one they lowered their guns, but the big guy just held his hand out a gesture my brothers used to help me from the truck when I was younger. We are outnumbered so with my heart racing I placed my hand into his, he just helped me from the cab of the truck and then Duane.

His smile was easy going, he wore faded jeans, a flannel with cowboy boots. "The names Matt, how you folks come up this way?" he seemed like a country boy deep down, he was polite and had not tried to kill us. Even his tone seemed easy, it flowed with his worried emotions.

I spoke. "We are running from a very bad person. Seems that when the world ended so did a lot of peoples' humanity. We are from Virginia."

This had them, the fact we were running from something. "Think we need to have a talk."

"Cameron James, this is my friend, Duane." my hand outheld he shook it with a smile before we are allowed to walk with them, they chatted among themselves as we walked through the gates, it was kinda like the Farm. Woman and children roamed but not many, men and cattle. Matt was signaling another man of massive stature, but he was at least sixty, his skin like worn leather.

Matt touched my shoulder. "Pa, we found these two un-armed other than a hunting knife. Seems they're running from someone."

"Names Jud, come have a seat. Matt get everyone together, we going to have little story time, have the kids do some reading."

I was not thrilled to be sitting with Duane as we sat at what seems like the head of this meeting, woman and I sit around. "We make decisions as a community, yeah, in the end I can go against, but we are family after all. Now Miss. James can you tell us what you are running from?"

With a deep shaky breath, I began. "I am from Alabama, before the outbreak I was a Professor. My older brothers, all six of them sent me away with friends from the Military when everything went to hell, that was how I ended up in Virginia. I was one of the heads of Alexandria, a very protected community, well peace was not meant to last. We ran into a group called the Saviors, they have others small settlements working for them, they take half if not more of everything you have. They kill to get you right on board, we lost over four, my boyfriend was taken to join them because he was the best hunter, tracker, he was a bulldog. It turned out Negan couldn't break him and was going to kill him no matter what, so he proposed an exchange me for him, I took it but knew they were still going to try and kill Daryl. I was held as Negan's 'Wife' for months, the abuse was more than I could bear, myself, Duane, along with his other wifes all escaped. In the end, I was the girl he was tearing states apart for, he found us, and we jumped off a cliff into raging white waters to escape. With luck we lived and found a truck, after that I drove and drove putting distance between us." the old man looked like daddy when Tucker almost killed me in the river, Matt was looking at every female in turn, they understood my small story how it was, I was still messed up the marks clear as day.

"We only ask for a week at most, we have to go back and help Hilltop, the Kingdom, and Alexandria as they take on the Saviors. I was scared and just drove." a girl just stood up, she was older too.

"You both need some clean clothes and some supper, Jud, I am taking them into the bog house. I am saying they can stay, I told you there were people like this roaming out there. The lowest of kinds come lurking when the bad happens, I will take my chances with the dead." she spat out and all bowed to her desire as she just shooed us into the house with Jud and Matt.

A warm meal and a shower made me feel much better as Jud and the old woman talked while holding hands when I walked from the spare room, Duane and I would be sharing while we stayed. She smiled, "Sorry dear, my name is Abby and Jud is my husband and Matt is our son. You two are welcome to stay as long as you need, and a good handful of men have volunteered to take you back home and help out, we survivors and decent human beings need to stick together in times like these." she was sent from God, she was like ma, fierce and protective.

I smiled. "That is so much to offer, are you sure? They will be risking their life's by doing so, they have families to care for." we walked into the living area seeing men standing around talking, all farm hands and owners, looking rugged.

"They understand this, now you lot need rest."

I made my mind up we should leave earlier, it was like a bolt of lightning hitting me. They think we're dead and with that information, they will launch an attack on the Sanctuary in days not weeks.

"I am planning on leaving in a day, our zone thinks we're dead and will act out in a rage. My boyfriend, Duane's pa, everyone we know will be ready to fight." this must have made sense to them because they all agree to head back with us. This was how we should act towards each other, helping and caring for each other, not trying to kill and take all that you can. The Ranch, Hilltop, Oceanside, and the Kingdom will go against the Saviors, I prayed the Farm stayed out of it.

Duane was sleeping when I walked into the spare room taking the bed on the left, but sleep was far away as I stayed awake through the night, it had been two days that we have been here, I was healing better now. It was perfect watching the sun rise over the mountains in bright oranges, yellows, and even reds, it felt like the Farm all over again but without the mountains. We are leaving though, it was another thirty-three-hour drive, with four trucks and a haul of guns, we bid goodbye to Abby and the rest, with every hope to see them once again.

I drove with Duane, the bed of the truck held guns, a few bags, along with Matt, Luke, Billy and Willow. The weather looks gloomy but with any luck we would make good time, and the rain held at bay.

I smiled. "You ready, Duane? When we arrive back I have a bad feeling the war will have already begun."

"Ready." he cocked the gun given to him by Jud after he helped hand make a haul of bullets for the guns, I helped and relished in the knowledge they gave about making them.

I just drove…


	19. Revelations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dr. Banner is that you?

Rain poured down as most are now in the cabs of the trucks with tarps covering everything else, we're making good time; only having to make minimal stops along the thirty-three-hour drive back home. Duane and Matt just talk about horses and how they wish none of this ever happened, how they lost loved ones. I smiled and just held Duane's hand.

I spoke. "We all lost people in the outbreak, but something bothers me. An outbreak of this magnitude…is it possible that the United States Department of Defense and other Western countries are directly responsible for infecting citizens with a virus? I know personally that the U.S. government has a research laboratory located in a town called Kenema in Sierra Leone that studies what they calls "viral fever bioterrorism" the United States and most Western countries, sources of most viral or bacterial GMOs that are strategically designed as biological weapons." taking a breath as they looked at me, in fear or awe.

I say. "It is most disturbing that the U. S. Government has been operating a viral hemorrhagic fever bioterrorism research laboratory in Sierra Leone. Are there others?"

Matt kinda looked upset," You shouldn't talk like that, Cameron. We may not have a government now, but when we did they would never unleash such an outbreak like this. They are our law and order they served and protected, you're talking treason." Matt, was a good country boy and going against our government was like being a terrorist so I dropped it, Michonne agreed with me when I alerted her of this theory.

Duane just chuckled as Matt drove on through the pouring rain. I noticed the rain was gone and the sun was high in the sky once we hit Virginia, at least we had stopped and rested for a little before this. The drive was killer as we all took shifts driving and getting gas for the trucks, ran into two hordes on the way here. But with us working together they were easily dispatched without a single gunshot to be heard.

My body was getting less and less sore even as the marks remained, but in the here and now being sore was not an excuse to lay down, life was always hanging by a thread. Right now, we all wanted just a small normal life, even if that meant killing the dead, but having to protect and kill the worst of us; the scum that survived by killing and taking from any they come across. Duane, Enid, Judith, and Carl deserved to have peace and it hurt us all that would never happen again, walkers roamed but noticing the walker population is dying down.

Again, choosing not to voice this to Matt, a human body will decompose, the eyes the very first to go, and we have run into a fair amount of ones where the sockets are hollowed out, as if by a spoon. Matt's cheery Mideastern tone cut through my thoughts. "We are nearly there, best we take it by foot now. Just like we showed you two, the trucks will be safe in this here lot." maybe he was right but right now, fear was churning my belly once again. I stood with Willow she was the only other female along for the ride.

Hank and Matt are taking the lead, with us all flanking in various positions, they're used to tracking and hunting to them this was no different. The trees are dense and provide security and lacking visibility to others as we creep along with the boys, Duane was next to me his gun ready. I gave him to Willow as I moved further up to Matt and Hank who where waving me up, it was a small hidden outpost we had been lucky to have not run into it when we escaped.

"A savior out post, and it seems they're ready with guns blazing." whispering as low as possible they just sigh making a few gestures, we all understood just fine as we moved in. We make no noise but when closer we hear them muttering. "They have some balls attacking the Sanctuary, Negan says we move in now. The Scavengers have already turned but they have the numbers." I moved first my blade in her neck with my hand held tight over her mouth as Matt took her companion in the same way, we just moved doing the same one by one, for me there really is no redemption for most of them, some yes.

Luke winked. "Like a girl like you, darlin."

But my little knight came to my aid. "She has a man, he is scary." being with Duane made me miss Enid and Carl even more, Duane was lacking in experience, but he was a fast learner, Carl and Enid had it down.

"I can still try." but Willow just shoved him to the nearest tree as we moved closing in on the Sanctuary, but the closer we come the louder the fighting is, we move down into the ditch seeing a horde of walkers advancing on King Ezekiel and Jerry, and after all they did there was no way they were going to die, at least right now.

"My friends, they come from the Kingdom." that's all they need to hear as we advance firing, some using knifes taking them down faster and faster. Jerry was laughing as King Ezekiel stood on a hurt leg when a massive Tiger leaps onto a rock, but she doesn't attack as Ezekiel stumbled to her, just petting her before he attached a chain.

"This, young Cameron James, is Shiva."

"That is the biggest kitty I have ever seen." but my admiration had to wait.

Jerry spoke. "I can get him back to the safe house, or we can go back to fighting." I gave them a look.

"Head to your safe house, does anyone know where it is?"

"Carol." then he and the King are gone, we watched before heading towards the sounds of gunfire.

Walkers are everywhere now, the blood the loudness drew them in like wolves to a flock. I moved faster taking them out with Willow and Duane with us now, these boys knew how to kill, we moved as a single unit taking anything out. Soon enough, I see my friends.

Hank holds up a closed fist. "Luke take them and circle around to the left, Billy you do the same but go around to the right, knock out any, but only kill walkers we have no idea who is with who. We need to cage them in, give me the signal so we can move in." my heart was racing, they are my new heroes. We were left with a small group, moving into a protective circle once to bright green lights were seen. It was smart, the light would go unnoticed by anyone but us. I follow as we expand to form a large circle now, my gun was ready with a bullet in the chamber.

They never noticed this, we moved in now as Negan was seen coming from the factory with Simon and Wade, the fight was already brewing as Hank gave me a look, but my eyes are on Negan and the fact he had a gun pointed at Daryl, he wouldn't miss. Daryl was in a fury as he charged Negan his sweet face so devoid of emotion.

I raised the rifle and fired, it rang clear as we advanced until we have them all caged in. The gun flew from his bleeding hand with a bellow of pain, but it made everyone stop and look around. "Well there she is, my girl." was all Negan could mutter as Simon tied off his wound.

Hank snarled, "Listen here boy, seems this ain't your girl. Now Cameron James, I think it best your friends segregate themselves from the others and join our circle."

"Rick, best if you get the others and join us, we came to aid you. Daryl—" I nearly choked when he impacted me, his arms tight and strong and no matter what he was safe, my personal safe-haven. He smelled like blood and dirt, but we held on as a loud cry was heard.

"MY BOY!" it was happy but anguished all the same, but Morgan was running full hilt until he was hugging his son who hugged him back with just has much enthusiasm. But anger hit me when our ranks formed all my brothers could be seen along with a few others I knew came from the Farm.

"Who got my brothers involved?"

Mark snapped back with Rosita at his side. "Cameron James, you have done gone and hit your head. We come to give you a check up and what do we find out, you at war with this walking piece of garbage. He done rape and beat on you, on our baby sister. Well, now we are here for a good old fashion ass whooping." so many whoops filled the air as the Sanctuary was no more, we rounded them up. Jesus was working alongside Aaron who was cradling an infant, Carl and Enid are with me in a massive hug, that Tara, Rosita, and Michonne join as Glenn talks to Rick.

But with Negan standing facing Daryl, the Saviors on their knees with Oceanside, and the rest guarding them.

"Come on boy, come at me." Negan taunted him, but my brothers all stepped forward dropping their guns.

"Nah see we're her brothers by blood, we ain't her friend."

Yeah, they didn't know, Rosita just smirked at me. "Oh boys, forgot to mention in my letter that Daryl and I, well we're together as in way more than friends." they just glared at him, but their attention turned back to Negan, who looked wary now.

"Damn kitten, you got a large family. Rick, you were a bust boy." he had it all wrong, but none spoke to correct it, maybe they didn't understand.

Daryl just slammed Negan into the ground, his arm around his throat area "That is my wife, my life now you goin to get your ass stomped." Daryl's voice was scary, it was like nothing that I have ever heard come from his lips. Carl and Enid just turned away as I also moved my head, walkers roam and are coming closer as we speak but my eyes see the vast blue sky, birds flying high making a weary caw sound that couldn't hide the scream of Negan.

But when his hands touched my face, he was bloody, and Negan was dead behind him, just like that it all ended.

"I can protect you." he whispered with his head against mine.

Enid snapped. "You just got his blood on her damn face, wash your hands."

A new voice broke the astrosphere. "A true community is not just about being geographically close to someone or part of the same social web network. It's about feeling connected and responsible for what happens. Humanity is our ultimate community, and everyone plays a crucial role." I knew that voice, I have heard that very same quote before when I was in a private school. We are surrounded by men, a United State Military tact unit and at the head was a man with white hair, a kind face if you didn't know better.

"Dr. Banner." I gasped, he should have died.

He smiled. "Hello again Cameron James, seems I was right, Daven taking her to the safe zone was best. We all have much to discuss, just know we have been watching for over a year, we have secured every state other than a few, we have others working on that, but we should have a seat this will be a troubling revelation." it was since Daven was standing in his gear, his eyes fearful as they looked at the six boys standing beside me, then to the one holding me.


	20. Too much, too soon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Not everyone is ready for the world to fall back together.

I was tired even as Daryl helped me take a seat in the ruins of the Sanctuary, Rick, my brothers, Michonne, Glenn, Carl, and the rest all stand behind me waiting to hear whatever Dr. Banner had to say to us. Any resistance was stomped out very fast, Dwight was cuddled up to Sherri, as many others came close to the rest.

Dr. Banner had aged, his hair now white yet it was styled to perfection. His face was the same even though many years passed. "I knew you would make it, Cameron. I do hope you bear no ill will towards Davin he was doing everything on orders. The outbreak was a biological warfare weapon, one which we have made great strides in. At first, it was only affecting America, so in this, we were not blamed, then it spread via air and water to other countries until every land mass was infected. After studying it we saw it was not having any effect on animals and marine life, the dead stayed dead. So, with more and more effort in finding the cure, we also studied the reanimated humans, they died of natural decomposing." He sipped a bottle of water. "Naturally this pleased us, the CDC was our base in this research but even we had time limits."

My hand held up, "This was created by you guys, you unleashed this and sent our world hurling into a movie worth planet. Dr. Banner, has a cure been found?" I questioned with my temper held in check, Bobby just shoved Davin away he betrayed us, in the end, he didn't care if they died it was my brains they wanted to save.

"We have, it has taken time, but you created a formula before you were taken it bonded with the virus, molding it, regenerating it. It can't bring them back, but it will keep us safe, but we in edition have reworked it and soon planes will fly overhead dropping dust that will finally kill and act like acid leaving nothing left of the reanimated. The dust will not harm us, animals, and plant life but now we will be creating a New America. The President and entire cabinet are safe, we will be rounding up any survivor as we re-build. I want you on our team we do not want another outbreak it was a mistake we will take every measure to prevent."

We never had a choice.

Jesus stood next to me months later as we entered the Heath Ridge Facility in Washington D.C. My brothers along with a guard unit went to collect Judith and the rest of the Farm, more escorted Ocean side and the Ranch to their home. Everyone was being moved here, broad cast going to every frequency, as more efforts are being made to keep moving and doing sweeps of state's and towns. But with the Military planes flying banners, guess any survivor will come running, if they want to be found.

Jesus was a smart man. "I hate this but now life will resume now, food will not be scarce. In another century this will be history, our world will renew. We will be in books, you will be the one who found the cure." he was sentimental.

"Oh yeah, my formula created a cure which is great. But we just lived through an actual zombie outbreak, when the film industry takes back off we will have a movie." it had been days since the dust cleared and we found out that so many had survived, more than we ever thought possible. Some must be retrained to act like a human, their speech corrected. But the new government was taking control of it all, they had plans to rebuild, everything was going to be a work in progress for our entire life time. But, our great grandbabies will be thankful, and their children after that. Rick was back to his old self his family settled into a nice home as Michonne was back to being an artist and Rick an officer and government official.

Everyone was finding their place once again, Carol and Ezekiel, Jerry, Aaron, Tara, everyone but Daryl. Even my brothers and the farm are here, all wearing Army uniforms, back to protect and serve, But Daryl, he was lost and I was lost without him.

He was so much more than what he once was.

Eugene found a nice nerdy girl who fit him better, as of right now my brother Mark was with Rosita, it looked like wedding bells and babies will be coming on many fronts. Maggie was going back to being a lawyer, and I had hopes Glenn would re-open a pizzeria, the food of the gods.

I wanted to teach, and it was needed, but not right now, right now working in the lab and conversing with President Obama was my main duty.

"See you tomorrow, time to go home and talk to Daryl. I never thought the outbreak would end, but now that it seemingly has he is just as lost. We have five groups coming first thing in the morning, so be ready." I was worried, and he knew this, it was still a fear the outbreak would return but my formula was solid, he just kissed my head knowing his words would not help. Our home is off from others more towards the woods to make him more comfortable, the home was lovely. It was an older one, with many room, rooms that are not filled yet, we sleep together in the master bedroom; no more him in one and I in another.

He was out on the porch looking clean, his hair was brushed from his face as Rick stood talking to him with Judith in his arms, she was thriving now. So, I lean against a tree hiding a little just listening to the boys chatting.

Rick spoke with his slow drawl, but it always held such authority. "This is what we need, my kids need. You have so much to lose if you chose to leave, they will keep watching you and Hank, as you travel but have you thought of Cameron, man she ain't going to go. She is needed here, you love her, you have that ring hidden from her, we love you Daryl you are our family just think on it, think what you will lose." he was going to up and leave, oh no.

I moved from my hiding spot placing a smile on my face, it hit me if he wanted to leave to travel I shouldn't stop him, he needed closure and if this was his way then he can go. It is going to hurt me, but love doesn't mean we stop the other from living the life they choose, and right now I am vital here and can't leave. I move through the drive way with a smile plastered to my face. "Hey boys." my feet carrying me up the porch.

Judith was the first to speak. "Auntie!" her voice chipper, tinkling like small bells. We all loved that she was talking now, her hands reaching out as I gladly took her from her daddy.

I smiled. "Hey there baby girl, you have fun at nursery school?"

She just nodded when her dad spoke. "Got word today, we have been able to clear and destroy the cars, and extra shit laying around. We think within the next twenty years our world will be what it used to be but with out the population, Australia is reporting the same facts along with Poland." this was good, new devices helped our clean-up but time was what we needed, and a good government not one built on corruption like the last.

"Good, I will be by your office after I and Jesus inoculate the new comers against the virus, I have some reports to go over." my voice low but my eyes bore into Rick's, he understood that my timing was not perfect and that I had heard them talking.

With a low sigh, "I will be there hunnie, come on Judith your mama is waiting." with that he was hugging and kissing us good bye before taking baby girl and walking from the porch.

Daryl was watching me. "You okay, Cami?" his voice low but his tone worried, right now I could tell him my fears and he would stay but that would never be right of me.

I answered him, "I am good, babe. Just tired." his face looked torn on disbelief, but he had no reason to not trust me. But he does take my hand and lead me into the house, it smelled good.

"Glenn brought us dinner, said other than Maggie you deserved this."

My heart racing seeing two perfect pizzas on the kitchen table, one was my favorite Hawaiian the other filled with meat. Of course, this is America we are going to get some good food out there first, Zombies gone for months and now we're rolling out pizzas.

"Bless him." this little statement made Daryl smile as we ate together, he wouldn't touch mine, he would lower himself to scowl at it.

"Enough, what has this delicious pie done to you, you brute?" he just smiled.

Retorting, "Fruit don't belong on pizza." he was wrong, very wrong.

"Oh, hush and eat your meat." We eat and talk before I am off to shower, it is already late and I need to go to bed. And with his arms around me it meant the world, there was, between us, a weightless, seamless desire. When I leaned in and kissed him, and at first, he was slow in his response, and then he was pulling up my light top to free my breasts. Touching the scar on his chest, remembering it again.

I had always thought the expression 'making love' a little maudlin; 'having sex' felt truer and 'fucking' was more arousing, but lying next to him afterwards, both of us smiling, sometimes laughing, my body suffused with peace, I thought how apt it was, that expression 'making love.' There was an awakening even in my nails, in those parts of my body that had always been numb. I wanted to tell him, 'There is no week that passed that I did not think of you.' It was true.

I wanted to kiss him forever. I blocked out all thought about what this was, what it might mean, what further mess I might create for myself. I kissed him until reason seeped out through my pores and I became a living pulse, conscious only of what I wanted to do to him. And suddenly we were crashing around the bed all hands and lips and, oh, God, the scent and taste and feel of him. It was like tiny fireworks going off all over me, bits of me I'd thought dead reigniting to life.

Daryl studied me, then caressed my breasts. He licked and nibbled on my nipples, then moved his lips slowly down my stomach. Daryl removed her underwear, and kissing me just above my pubic bone.

He looked down at me, and a low rumbling sound started in his chest. Working up to the back of his throat, my legs turned to jelly with the look he was giving me, my throat tight and heart pounding. Slowly he bent down over me; he lifted his hand and pulled off my top leaving me exposed as the silk material was ruined. His hand came down on my exposed breast, large and round, soft with large, tight pink nipples. He filled his palm with me, to discover a new warm, velvety texture of my flesh. Then just as slowly his hand drifted down ward once again, smoothing over the sleek delta of my stomach and the slope of my lower abdomen, his fingers at last sliding into the dark curls of my women hood. I sat there, shaking wildly and unable to move, paralyzed by the hot river of pleasure that followed his questioning touch. One finger made a bolder foray, my body jerked wildly, I whimpered as he touched me, his finger was trying to enter me, I was wet, he kept pushing a little too hard till his finger was in. I jerked and cried out, I felt the intrusion and was in heaven He moved it around and in and then pulled it out, I was gasping.

He lifted his gaze. "I love you Cameron James Aldridge." he said in a deep husky voice.

"I love you too Daryl, now till forever." I said panting.

"You're mine forever." he said. Then he started. He was cupping my soft female mound, then his hand drifted to my breast, he latched his mouth around my nipple licking and sucking, he nibbled hard he moved to my other breast and repeated his ministrations.

My eyes were half closed, glazed with desire; my lips were moist and parted, my breath coming in and out in a rush and gasps. And a look of sweet carnality exploded the slim hold he still had on himself. With a wild, deep sound, he tore off his shirt, and then he jerked his pants until they lay on the floor, along with my towel.

He was on top of my body, his hands bracing me for him. He kissed me, with lust and passion; he lowered himself into me, with a rocking motion trying to fit in. My body arched and I screamed into his mouth, in pain and shock. He held me down with his body, my walls gave way and he slid in until my velvet walls in cased him, but he wasn't fully in yet. With all his will power he was able to hold still so I could adjust, I cried out, his mouth was on my neck. There was a pinching discomfort, with a jolt to my senses.

He… Was… oh….

Powerfully, our bodies moved together. The intensity was unbearable. He had rolled his hips into me, with a heavy surge, and it was abruptly too much for me to handle, making me writhe and shake beneath him, my senses shattered in a mind-blowing climax.

I cried out "Dar - Dayr - DARYL." I raked my nails down his back, I could feel his wet blood, as I cried and shook around him.

I was in a bubble of shimmering pleasure and intense heat.

I saw through my heavy-lidded eyes. I felt his heavy pounding of his hard thrusts; he was driving himself with rough force into me. I moaned and wrapped my legs around him clinging to him. Then he started to shake and tremble heaving his body in my arms. His horse wild cries filled my ears, and then came, rough moans echoed as he reached his release. He thrusted frantically in me, I felt hot liquid being spurted in me. He became silent, and still. His muscled body relaxed, and his heavy weight bore down on me, but I cradled him gently, my hands in his long hair.

He levered himself onto his right elbow, he looked down at me as I was pressed into his chest. His beautiful dark eyes were darker with concern for me. After he had taken me with all the care and finesse of a bull in rut! But love was in his eyes, love so pure, it was shining in his eyes. It shattered a wall, in my mind and soul, leaving me vulnerable in a way I have never been before.

I fell asleep in his arms for the first time; I knew it would not be the last.

Only to come home twenty days later from work to a note on our bed, I sat for hours just staring at the note. I knew he was gone, the last two days have been rather odd, he was on edge after a group of saviors came and two men called out to him, His Uncle Jess and his Father, the one who beat on him. They will be out of the quarantine by tomorrow, but he was gone. I can't bring myself to open it so I stare at it, I can hear footfalls behind me and the voice of Maggie calling out for me.

She finds me sitting in bed staring at the note, her round belly making it hard for her to sit but she did her arm around me. "What is it hun, I brought some pizza."

"Read me the note." I sounded ruined, throat clogged with emotion.

She opened it not knowing what it would say, but I knew. I thought we were so happy, that he had changed his mind.

She let out a small sob

"Cameron,

I am in love with you, I need you, so I don't even know why I am running off. I tried to adjust like the rest of ya'll but I wasn't meant for this. You're, you're in your element here, I watched you day in and day out just being baddass. You have filled your day with work and filled my night with such passion. I will be back, I just need to find myself. What am I? The world is back and I still don't belong, now you don't need me. I want you to be my wife but first I need to do this, please don't hate me.

Yours always, Daryl Dixon"

Even through the tears I could see the positive pregnancy test laying in front of me, like a small beacon of betrayal.


	21. Little one

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Not all is good in the world.

It had been a few months since he left, his Uncle Jess was not bad at all a little rough around the edges but still a good guy. His father and I, well we have never spoken, and I was fine with that. Maggie was now on her last leg, in fact, she was in the hospital, we have here waiting to have Rae. I had a rounder abdomen now, it was very noticeable I was with child, and Daryl's Uncle knew it was Daryl's child.

I had Carl and Enid, Tara, and Rosita whenever she was here. She was on the Farm helping to produce more cattle and food supplies, same with the Ranch. I had friends and family all around me, but I was alone, none knew how devastated I was. He left after I thought he was going to stay and us settle down. He just wasn't the type.

"Cameron." Dr. Banner's voice dragged me from my wandering thoughts.

The Vice President and a few others all staring at me. "Yeah, pregnancy brain, it is real fellas. But as I was saying, while reconstructing society is ideal there are still problems with the aftermath because group leaders still love the idea of being in power and will do anything to stay in power. Another problem is if there are enough people in the world to repopulate the planet and if there isn't then humanity will be extinct within the year or the next year, the final problem is how survivors can live with each other. Some survivors may have resorted to cannibalism to stay alive so they'd think that they are at a point where society can never be normal anymore not only that but hostile survivors may still act like violence is the solution to every problem so there is a problem with morals and ethics. We seem to be making headway on all issues, due to the outbreak not having gone on for years, the damage is reversible, I have issued a few orders to put to sleep ones we will not be able to rehabilitate." I took another breath, Jesus and I came to that decision together, it was not something we liked but had to be done.

I continued, "If the government of a nation acts quickly enough and manages to pull together to protect its citizens during the outbreak, it is likely that society will not change much in the aftermath. Which has been our blessing, large areas called safe zones or refugee camps will house survivors until the military can clear dangerous areas. However, this kind of scenario enables the government and military to have extraordinary power; the same power that leads us to the outbreak. This can lead to extreme oppression. It can also cause safe zones to be left unprotected, allowing bandits to harass the citizens and/or take control. Which I have been subjected to, now in this new Government changes need to be made, for the good of your people. I and a few other leaders have gone over these and agree." my hand was pale as I slid the red binder over to our Vice President who smiled, it was a blessing to them we agreed to the changes they wanted to make.

Vice President Biden spoke. "Thank you, Cami. Jill and I are sorry for your loss." he was just sweet like my own Grandfather was.

Jesus and I walked from the late afternoon meeting, I was very tired already trying to just keep myself busy since it made it easier to not miss him, even after months have gone by. "You have an appointment, come on." I did, his voice low and kind as we walked to the elevator.

I was now twenty-eight weeks along, half done with the pregnancy and it made me miss and hate him even more. "What if the outbreak is not gone, what if it happens once again?" he questioned in a hushed tone.

I snorted, "Then Daryl will come back."

But I think we beat this, but it was a fear of anyone's here, what if?

"Have we gotten the sheets for survivors yet? We have to calculate the repopulation percentage."

"Should have them by the morning." it was Dee, she was my assistant, which was good. She was good at it and kept me updated on pretty much anything I was already involved in and some I wasn't privy too. Jesus was going to be in the birthing room with my family in the waiting area. Rick, well he was happy about a grandchild, Michonne was worried about me, Carl and Enid are overzealous in helping me in any way as they do a year of school as a basis to what they have missed. Duane fit right in with them, the three of them like peas in a pod as a few others their age moved into the sector we lived in.

I yawned, "Have them on my desk in the morning if they're ready, that will be a daily process."

"Yes ma'am." with a wave she was heading towards my office and her own desk, after this I was clocking out and going home for the day.

Jesus mused, "It will take a few hours to even calculate, then we will have to do a data wide spreadsheet. But that crap is for tomorrow, today we get to see the baby. Tara and Cyndie came back and no trace of him, but if he wanted to be found he would be, we could ask his Uncle Jess maybe tracking runs in the family, like a pack of bloodhounds." his tone of voice was gravelly like Daryl's low and rough.

His hand in mine, but he was dating Aaron and they have Gracie from the Sanctuary, this was pure friendship, a friendship of the best kind. "I never thought they'd find him but as my friends it meant so much that they tried, Tara is doing well as a teacher, in her element. I think we're going to get Enid in here with us, Carl thinks the force is for him and I agreed, it is in his blood." now my tone of voice seemed very as I was told by Uncle Jess and Jesus, smoky. I never knew a voice could be smoky, Jesus said it was sexually attractive in a slightly mysterious way.

Denise was waiting when we walked up, "Come on in, my last of the day." she was one of many who took to the change well, I figured if Jessie and her two brats lived they would be doing very well here.

"I feel ready to burst am I supposed to be so large?" she gave me a look as Dr. Harris walked in with a large smile.

He chimed in, "We will check the measurements, don't fret it is bad for the baby."

I found myself laying on the reclined ultrasound table as Denise squirted blue gel over my round belly, it was hard, but you could see the baby moving as Jesus traced shapes onto my belly. "Baby likes you." Denise smiled but it wasn't filled with her normal cheeriness. She thought of Daryl like a brother, and he was taking her under his wing but now we are abandoned. I knew if I wasn't having his child maybe then I wouldn't be so angry but here I was so hurt, sad, lonely, and so very angry.

"Now look at this, do you want to know the sex?" oh god, this was so sudden. I want to yes, but should I?

Jesus was watching me with a single nod he spoke, "Yes please, Denise." the baby was moving so much but I could see a small nose, hands waving, legs kicking the shit out of me, so perfect.

Her eyes are misty as she spoke again, "Little Daryl." it was a boy.

"A boy?"

"A boy." she smiled, I was going to be my mama with a horde of boys' running loose on the world. But my brothers all joined our Military and were great brothers, so guess it wouldn't be so bad but here I am getting ahead of myself.

I was alone, now.


	22. My Boy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time is the most undefinable yet paradoxical of things; the past is gone, the future has not come, and the present becomes the past even while we attempt to define it, and, like the flash of lightning, at once, exists and expires.

Time is the most undefinable yet paradoxical of things; the past is gone, the future has not come, and the present becomes the past even while we attempt to define it, and, like the flash of lightning, at once, exists and expires.

I look at my son.

To me he is perfect with his observant nature, he sits with Gracie and Rhee, his best friends. Judith was normally there but now she has friends her own age. Two years ago, I gave birth to this little angel, I named him Daryl Franklyn Dixon after his pa and my own. He had long dirty brown hair and dark blue eyes with unique flecks of hazel scattered. A few freckles touched his little nose, but all in all he looked like his father. I was surrounded by Michonne, Tara, Denise, Enid, Abby, and Maggie when I gave birth, Rick was a mess as the boys had to wait in the lobby.

But for now, he never asked who his father was, he was not very talkative, but he was a fighter. He was taller then the few little ones his age, as Michonne says he has my brains but his fathers bulldog fighting nature. Uncle Jess says little Daryl looks and acts a lot like his father when he was a babe, and that made me smile. I hated my ex, he had made a very rash choice even though in his head he validated it. He left me regardless, and now it has been two years, two damn years, Rick was hurt by this while his wife was down right homicidal.

Maggie smiled, "I never thought we would see these days again, I wish Beth and daddy were around to finally see them too. Daddy always thought the dark days of the outbreak would end." she looked to the sky as she spoke. I had heard such great things about her pa, Hershel, he seemed like a great man and father.

I retorted, "They see it and glad you got to experience it with your family."

Time does not pass, it continues.

Life was as normal as it could be, I stand in the kitchen cooking with Daryl behind me strapped into his chair, coloring his little heart out. He was just mumbling under his breath in words I could never understand, his eyes cast down when I turned to him. "Okay, its supper time. You hungry?" he smiles at the sound of my voice and it made me wonder if his father ever had the chance to look up to his ma and just be happy.

"Yes mama." his voice was silvery, it was light and pleasant even though it sounded a tad husky.

We eat together but my mind is off, it hasn't been like this but at times thinking of his father brought everything back. I was still in love with him, some nights he was my last thought, sometimes he is my first thought when I wake. I caught myself thinking about everything we had been through while I work, I know it needs to stop it has been over two years and about to be over three as our son's birthday is tomorrow.

Daryl slams his sippy cup on the wooden table, "Mama kay?" his little face worried but it faded as I smiled down at him.

"Mama was thinking about your birthday party tomorrow, are you super excited for all our friends and family to come?" he was, his face was lit like a Christmas tree. We talked while he finished his supper, he deserved a father, one who was around but then again, I was very closed off now.

"Come on little bulldog, time for bath than bedtime. You need to have a good sleep, so you can have your party."

"Yes mama." he spoke clearly, but like other children he at times mumbled gibberish.

This was us, our nightly thing, supper, bath, and bed. I set the book down looking at my son. He did, he looked like his father with little parts of me nestled into his features and brain.

I whispered, "Know that being my son means something. It means I will protect you to the very last vestige of my power. I will stand before you should danger come your way, beside you as you find your footing, and only behind when you are ready to be a man. I won't ever leave you. Not ever. Though these bones will age my love is eternal, so am I, so are you. I hope you never felt you had to earn my love, to prove yourself worthy, you never did. I was there when you came into the world, I saw the divine spark that is your soul kindle in your newborn eyes. Whatever challenges come your way, I know the real you, the one inside, the one that is my son." with a small kiss to his head I leave him to sleep while I go clean up the kitchen and get some sleep myself. Tomorrow was a new day, the very day three years ago my son chose me to be his mother.

It was now near noon; his party was at three. Rick walked in with Michonne, Judith, Carl, Duane, and Enid. "I came for my grandson, we are going to go fishing with Carl while you ladies do all the hard work." he has been my rock, he lost too when Daryl left.

Michonne laughed with her arms wrapped around me, "Come to grandma, little bulldog." and he did he loved his grandparents and Uncle Carl and Auntie Enid.

"Thank you, we have so much to get done. Daryl, you be a good boy for grandpa." my lips to his forehead as his little hands mushed my cheeks together, kissing any inch he could as he was passed to grandpa.

I turned back, "Carl, Duane, you are in charge of them both."

He laughed," You got it, sis." his voice was gruffer now, he seemed to grow like a weed too. His hair was longer now as his height reached 6'1 with life being normal, food being given.

Maggie, Tara, Rosita, Abby, Denise, and Enid are all doing task's from blowing balloons up, to decorations anything and everything in little Bulldogs favorite thing, Motorbikes. I was in the kitchen with Michonne and Aaron, we are cooking up some food even though Glenn and Jesus are on their way with pizza. My house would soon be filled, the grill was warming up as Aaron was slathering chicken and ribs with his homemade BBQ sauce. All six of my brothers are out back setting up a play set they built for their only nephew and his little friends. Rosita was taking a break her head on the table as she popped a chip covered in dip into her mouth, she was 4 months along now.

I just rubbed her back, "You got this." she just smiles back holding my hand, her and Markus are a match made in heaven.

I called out, "Denise, is Cyndi on her way with the cake?"

"I AM HERE!" was yelled back, Cyndi was smiling behind me with an awe-inspiring confection in her arms.

"Rick is on his way back, Aaron he said back off the grill." Michonne called out as Glenn arrived everything was perfect as his friends arrived, Judith and Rhee are being watched by Jesus as they break in his gift outback.

Carl was carrying a sleeping Daryl, Rick was smiling with three large fish they reeled in. "I got those." Gale smiled she was good at deboning fish, Oceanside were the best at fishing period.

The party was on, balloons being pooped, kids running around laughing even as I grabbed my son to clean his face, his great Uncle Jess let out a booming laugh. "Run boy, here take a sickle." he handed Daryl a blue raspberry popsicle before he was bolting for the back door.

"You have to let loose once in a while, he is a boy let him get dirty." he was right, I was so strict and that needed to stop. My ma and pa let me get dirty and act like my brothers, as long as every Sunday I was a lady while sitting in the church pews.

This was a great life, Jesus was watching a now mobile Gracie as she tried to hang with the big kids, and the kids took her under their wings helping her onto the playset with both her daddies watching like hawks.

I just laughed as Daryl and his friends sit in a circle covered in ice cream and cake, orange, black, and yellow icing in their hair and Jesus's, he should have let Gracie finish her cake first.

"My god, you did good, you did really good with my grandson. Better than I ever did with my boys, better than their own ma did. I am sorry my boy left like that, I blame myself, I have so many things I needed to say to him and his brother. I saw the ones ya'll killed because they couldn't reform back to who they were, all I can say is that I am glad I changed, that I found Mable when the world fell. Merle is gone, and I can't tell him how sorry I am, but my bulldog is still out there." I had watched this man for the last three years and saw how he must have changed, he came around with little gifts for his grandson and tried to be there, teaching him tracking and hunting with Uncle Jess.

Smiling, "It is never to late, give it time and you will be able to try and make things right."

I moved just watching the fun, even Dr. Brenner is here having fun which is a creepy sight. My brothers watching him as they drink moonshine and love on their wives, my eyes catch something in the kitchen, someone was watching out the window.

Who would be inside when the party was hoppin' outside, I walked away to go drag who ever it was out. The kitchen was empty, but a gruff voice called out. "You havin a party?"

It was Daryl.

"Three years and you come strolling in like it was yesterday, boy you got me twisted. You left me with a note, you left all your family, Rick, Carl, Michonne, and Denise, you left me alone!" shoving him into the wall, my voice reaching high levels.

"Cameron, I never meant to be gone so long. I was wrong, I fucked up, I needed to leave and find myself!"

I yelled, "AND YET YOU COULDN'T TALK TO ME! YOU JUST UP AND LEAVE WHEN I NEEDED YOU, YOU HAD SOMETHING TO STAY FOR!"

A voice chimed over my shoulder, "You thought of no one but yourself, you abandoned your family. I never wanted you to be me, I was a fuck up and a piss poor father to you and your brother. You left your girl and your son." I winced hearing his father behind us, but it was the look on Daryl's face that worried me. He paled steppin back from us both.

"My son?"

"You never talked to me, the day you left I was on my way home to tell you I was pregnant. We have a son, his name is Daryl Franklyn Dixon, he turned three today, this is his party."

Maggie walked in with Tara, both paled with wild eyes as they spotted my ex. Then it was like hell on earth, Tara screamed out. "THIS MOTHERFUCKER CAME BACK, PLAN A1" what was this plan A? But as a horde of angry females started screaming at him he was retreating from them, I saw a smile or two from him, but they just advanced on him until Rick and Morgan broke it up.

The kids filed in. "Get them out until we hose them off, I called to Jesus who did just that, all but my boy who was trying to climb up my thigh with dirty hands, in his wake he left my jeans coated in cake, dirt, and food.

"MAMA YELLIN!" he clapped about to mush my cheeks when my face moved back from him.

"Daryl, you have very dirty hands. Mama needs you to go with Uncle Aaron." Aaron had Gracie, but he came over snatching my boy up.

"I got him, you just calm down."

Daryl was watching all this, the way his eyes lingered on our son, taking in how much they looked alike. "My boy?"

"HER BOY!" Maggie just let lose her fist, we all watched as it slammed into his nose.


	23. I hate you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He whispered, "Hate me, love me, just please let us work this out."

Daryl was taken by Rick and Glenn for a little talk as we cleaned up, Jesus was giving me that look as he tried to judge my emotions and right now so many are busting through it was chaos. "You need me to stay? You know I will." his tone low making the conversation float between only us.

With a sigh my answer is simple, "No, he ain't going to be an issue and if it gets bad he can stay at my dad's until I issue him an apartment, which will probably happen tomorrow." I was very unsure of how to proceed with this, with his return. I was still very much in love with him and wanted us to work out, but time may have changed his mind.

Jesus and Aaron are the very last to leave, Michonne just gave Daryl a side eye as she held Andie in her arms. Andie was my newest little sister, 2 months old with a light chocolate brown skin, lighter by far than her mamas, her eyes a stunning blue she was so small and precious. Daryl, he just hugged her as she passed him. "You watch it boy, that is my baby right there." she was fierce about those she loved, a trait her and I shared, it could be a flaw at times.

My six brothers are at the hotel here, before they leave in the morning we're supposed to meet for breakfast before I head into work, and little D into the care center. Little D was in my arms as I watched the last guest leave my home, at least they stayed to clean leaving me with one, no, two tasks, first was to give little D a bath before bed, second was talking to my ex and his father.

"I am going to go give my son a bath and brush his teeth, its close to his bed time." not sure if I was talking to him or saying things out loud to fix the odd silence that had taken over.

He just looked at me, "Can I stay, or you want me to go?"

I just turned back to him, "It don't matter none, do what you want. It is what you do, you don't take the one you love into account."

I left him staring taking the right hall to little D's room, with his little bathroom. I just grabbed a few things as the tub filled and little D removed his clothes, he was such a good boy sticking them in the small hamper. "Come on, we need to get you tucked in," his little hand in mine as we walked into the tub. He just played while I brushed his teeth, soon after I was staring down at him as he fiddled with the arrow, it looked harmful but really wasn't. His eyes turned up to my own, "You sleep well? Mama is going to go finish cleaning your bathroom and then go talk to my friend."

"He my daddy, like Unca Glenn to Rhee?" he understood just fine.

"Yes, my little bulldog, he is your daddy." he just smiled playing with his arrow while his eyes dropped once, then twice as I walked away to tidy up his bath toys. Once I walked back into his room he was sleeping with his father watching from the open door, I just walked passed him heading to the front room so that we could talk. Talking was going to lead to so many emotions, emotions I have tried to hide and deny, but now was not the time for either of those.

I heard the soft click of my son's door closing then the heavy steps he was taking behind me. I just sit in the lounge chair as he looked for a closer seat but found none, so he just pulled the end table to sit in front of me, I wanted him a few feet away as why I took this damn chair.

He spoke first, his voice low and gruff. "Cameron, I really messed up and can never tell you how stupid I was for doing it. I wanted to find myself, but all I found was the man who was the same after time passed, all I lost was you. I thought it be easier on you and me, if I just left without you having to see me. I was selfish, I couldn't look at you cry and just leave, so I just vanished. I was always who I made out to be, I just felt you didn't need me now."

His eyes turning down, his hair was a tad longer now his features a little older as well. "I needed you, not because I was having our son but because you were my other half. This adjustment to the new world was hard on you, but you were needed we found a job for you. Hunting down a few escaped unsavory people, some don't want to come here and be treated but if they don't we could have another small outbreak. Now, we have sent others due to your leaving and they have not been as successful as you could have been. I needed you to love me, our son needs you now, you need to be his father. I can authorize you an apartment near Carl as he and Enid have their own too." his body was up, and he was glaring down at me with some emotion moving across his face.

He snapped, which was new he never talked to me in that tone or in that way. "I will be staying in our home, we got this one together. We can raise our son together end of story." he was not backing down, but if push came to shove Rick would escort him out to avoid a fight.

But his face changed "You found someone?"

"No, have not dated or tried. I still love you, but the fact you stayed gone for so long has changed things."

That was all the encouragement he needed, "Then I ain't going to go live alone, we are going to be a damn family. I can work on my mistakes as long as I know I have you and now our son."

I snapped back. "What if I don't want you here?! You think of that, you just packed up and left the girl you love after everything we have been though. While you were gone, I had a son, Michonne had a daughter, same with Maggie. Carol married Ezekiel, all our friends are so happy, and I was stuck hating you for hurting me. I never was angry you left little Daryl because you never knew, but you knew me, you loved me but, in the end, you still left. YOU LEFT ME, AND I HATE YOU FOR IT!" my voice getting higher and higher as my anger flared, but he just wrapped me in his arms holding me close, not letting me move with good right since I was going to punch him.

He whispered, "Hate me, love me, just please let us work this out."


	24. Barbecue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The end

I've looked high and low. I've been from shore to shore, if there's a short cut I'd have found it. But there is no easy way around it.

I watched little Daryl sleeping, it was barley seven in the morning, but it was Saturday and that meant gardening and time with my family. We're having a Barbeque, so the ribs would need to go on the smoker for at least a good six to eight hours before hand, we got some chicken and sausage also going in. It has been two weeks since his return, he is due back today, he was with his father and Uncle Jess rounding up a few men who in no certain terms rather the world fall apart once again. This kept him busy and feeling rather important, he and I have yet to work out our issues when time would do that for us in the end.

I needed to get on cooking, everyone was bringing a side dish so there was really not much I could do but make a fruit salad and smoke the meats. Music was on low as I cleaned the house, would have been nice to sleep in but that was a far-fetched dream. Daryl was gone and when he was here he was in the spare room until we figured out how to fix things. But knowing he was a single room away was eating at me. When he is home he would sleep little and be grumpy. He was bonding with our son though, it was like they were never apart, like two peas in a pod. Little Daryl was still a mama's boy who would run to me with every cut and boo-boo asking for a kiss.

His father would watch us with soft eyes, seeing a past he never had but would have liked. Together this last two weeks we worked very well together to make sure he was well rounded, he was smart and a hunter.

It was a blessing to have him home, I didn't feel as stressed with work and our home life, I was able to, as Uncle Jess put it, loosen up a bit with Little Bulldog.

Outside it was humid, the air sticky with heat as the smell of red wood and cherry billowed from the smoker, I just tended to my small garden to keep myself busy. It was like a stress relief to be honest, one I was good at. We had hours before all the family came for the small engagement party, Enid and Carl would do well in marriage.

I found myself sitting under the umbrella just watching little Bulldog and Rhee playing together, only months apart but best friends. Maggie next to me as Glenn was at work and she resumed her work as a lawyer, but for now we sip sweet tea and chat while our kids play.

She gave me a look, "He is going to ask you, Rick would kill me for tellin but hell you're my best friend. Daryl, he got you a ring." her tone playful but serious, her face matched mine in the shock and dismay.

My breath caught in my throat, I was shell shocked, he was goin to ask me to be his wife, this was not the best time we aren't even sleeping in the same room. She continued, "Guess he just can't let you go, as he said, 'she is my girl and I ain't going to let some bastard have her'." but no one had me, Maggie knew this.

"Lord help me." my voice coming out as if I needed more air, breathless.

I knew he would be home soon, I held Andie as Michonne was bringing Dad another cold one, I loved having everyone over and seeing the life we never thought we would have being played out in front of my own eyes. Like a dream.

The music played as he walked in taking a beer before picking our son right up and moving towards Rick, Jesus stood with us since Aaron was now the one pushing kids on the swing set.

Carl and Enid laugh as they get teased without mercy, but fate worked out for so many, and it was destiny they found each other. But right now, I can feel his stare boring into my back.

I snapped, "Stop staring at me."

"Hard not to look at you. You're goin to be my wife, we're going to have another little, rugrat." he was off his rocker, I don't know if I wanted another child.

For the next sixteen years, his love, his passionate kisses, the love we shared for our only child, the love we had for all our family held us together. Daryl was my future, and a very loving and hardheaded one at that, we married and lived a lifetime filled with hunting, love and happiness.


End file.
